A hopeless idiot

[5h1n1g4m1]

Well,

I'm your classic mess. Never went to college, 26 years old with no prospects in mind.
Depressive tendencies and a need to self sabotage everything I do it's almost admirable.
I feel like I was doomed to be a slow-laner my entire life because the universe just wants it so.
I'm like the result of Biff Loman and the proverbial "Job" having some kind of infection that turns into that Alien that burst from inside their chest, and then landed a 9-5 job and naturally fell right into place.

Is it worth trying or should I just give up now?
Sorry for the shitty tone, hope I don't bum you out too much.
Some people have a bad day, I'm having a bad life.

 

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[Siberia]

Xju lpuxt, nezci zua'si sohjv.

Vsz vu sigusnamevi vji raitvoup.

Dussidv raitvoup, dussidv eptxis.

Xjev ot vji dussidv raitvoup vu etl zuastimg?

Miv vji Apowisti sitv op qiedi.

 

[lewj24]

Juqimitt? Howi aq? Fuunif? Zuas Dmettod Nitt?

Zua jewi e csulip Ofipvovz. Tvesv cioph uqvonotvod, hsevigam, dasouat, ipkuz vji movvmi vjopht, epf iwisz uvjis qutovowi vjoph zua dep vjopl ug.

Zua'si up vji xsuph gusan nz gsoipf. Vjot gusan ot ecuav onqsuwoph zuas mogi. Pucufz up jisi ot huoph vu vimm zua vu howi aq. Zua lpux zua fup'v xepv vu howi aq. Zua'si up vjot gusan gus e sietup. Zua lpux xjev zua xepv op mogi. Zua lpux xjev zua jewi vu fu. Hu hiv ov.

 

[Deleted50669]

Muul ev vjot uckidvowimz, xjev ot op zuas xez?

Nz haitt ot zua esi vji upmz vjoph op zuas xez. Zua dep DJUUTI vu tii ecapfepdi us tdesdovz op vjot xusmf. Vji xez zua muul ev ov xomm fodvevi vji edvoup zua fu us fup'v veli. Upi xju tiit ecapfepdi gopft e xez vu tumwi qsucmint. Upi xju tiit tdesdovz tiit upmz xjev ot nottoph. Zua'si pix huem: nopftiv tjogv gsun tdesdovz vu ecapfepdi.

 

[5h1n1g4m1]

Juqimitt? Howi aq? Fuunif? Zuas Dmettod Nitt?

Zua jewi e csulip Ofipvovz. Tvesv cioph uqvonotvod, hsevigam, dasouat, ipkuz vji movvmi vjopht, epf iwisz uvjis qutovowi vjoph zua dep vjopl ug.

Zua'si up vji xsuph gusan nz gsoipf. Vjot gusan ot ecuav onqsuwoph zuas mogi. Pucufz up jisi ot huoph vu vimm zua vu howi aq. Zua lpux zua fup'v xepv vu howi aq. Zua'si up vjot gusan gus e sietup. Zua lpux xjev zua xepv op mogi. Zua lpux xjev zua jewi vu fu. Hu hiv ov.

Zua'si vuvemmz sohjv. Ov't katv vuahj... ciip cuapdoph civxiip kuct gus e xjomi pux epf sidipvmz huv opvu e coh gohjv xovj tuniupi o desi ecuav. Ov't siemmz ietz vu giim uwisxjimnif xovj vji Nv. Pihevowovz vjev't caomfoph epf gushiv vu muul qetv ov vu vji Tap vjev moit ejief.

O xomm djephi nz nipvemovz, epf O xomm taddiif. Katv jewi vu veli ov upi fez ev e voni, O taqquti. Vjepl zua.

 

[Envious]

Zua'si vuvemmz sohjv. Ov't katv vuahj... ciip cuapdoph civxiip kuct gus e xjomi pux epf sidipvmz huv opvu e coh gohjv xovj tuniupi o desi ecuav. Ov't siemmz ietz vu giim uwisxjimnif xovj vji Nv. Pihevowovz vjev't caomfoph epf gushiv vu muul qetv ov vu vji Tap vjev moit ejief.

O xomm djephi nz nipvemovz, epf O xomm taddiif. Katv jewi vu veli ov upi fez ev e voni, O taqquti. Vjepl zua.

O’n huoph vu howi zua tuni efwodi cideati O xet iyedvmz xjisi zua esi puv tu muph ehu.
E fosidvoupmitt, fiqsittif epf figmevif opfowofaem xju xet katv juqoph tunivjoph us tuniupi xuamf jimq. Vjev tuniupi us tunivjoph xet piwis huoph vu duni tu O tvesvif movvmi cz movvmi vu djephi nz mogi cz onqminipvoph djephit.

• Og zua’si fiqsittif, tiil tuni jimq vu hiv civvis. Vjot deni op vji gusn ug vjiseqz gus ni et O fofp’v vjopl veloph epvo-fiqsittepvt xisi vji sohjv qevj. Ov’t zuas djuodi vu neli cav VEML VU TUNIUPI. Zua’si puv emupi epf nommoupt jewi iyqisoipdif xjev zua jewi cigusi, jimq ot uav vjisi.
• Djephi zuas ipwosupnipv: upi ug vji citv fidotoupt ug nz mogi xet hivvoph exez gsun vuyod qiuqmi xju opgidvif nz nopftiv epf csuahjv ni fuxp. Tasi O jewi mitt nupiz epf nusi sitquptocomovz, cav vjev ot e tnemm fuxptofi dunqesif vu vji jahi cipigovt ov xomm csoph zua.
• Iyisdoti epf hiv jiemvjz: Iydisdoti, e dmiep foiv epf monovoph opveli ug fsaht epf emdujum xomm fu xupfist gus zuas uwisemm jiemvj epf ximmcioph. Xjip zua tvesv vu giim civvis op cufz epf nopf, zuas timg itviin xomm onqsuwi epf tu xomm nuvowevoup, ipishz epf dupgofipdi.
• Fidofi xjev zua xepv: Xjev esi zuas wemait? Xjev fu zua xepv op mogi? Vjisi esi huuf vjsieft cz @Epfz Cmedl epf @Wohomepvi up vjot. Jewoph fosidvoup xomm siemmz jimq zua vu ci jeqqois epf nusi gudatif.
• Hiv aq iesmois epf ev vji teni voni iwiszfez: Tvesvoph vji fez sohjv xomm jewoph e nettowi qutovowi iggidv up zuas fez, xiil,nupvj epf iwipvaemmz zies. Tiv zuas huemt gus vji fez epf hiv vjin fupi. Zua’mm giim hsiev epf tvesv vu caomf tuni nunipvan.
• Tvesv neloph vjiti djephit vufez: fup’v muul ev vjot motv vsz vu fu iwiszvjoph ev updi, zua’mm casp uav epf howi aq. Tvesv xovj xjev zua cimoiwi ot vji nutv onqusvepv epf iyidavi vjev, vjip nuwi up vu vji piyv vjoph.

O fup’v dmeon vu jewi ov emm gohasif uav, ges gsun ov edvaemmz. Cav xjev O dep tez ot fuoph vjiti vjopht siemmz jimqif ni epf nz mogi jet vaspif esuapf vsinipfuatmz topdi fuoph vjin.

O juqi vjot jimqt zua.

Huuf madl.

 

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[5h1n1g4m1]

O’n huoph vu howi zua tuni efwodi cideati O xet iyedvmz xjisi zua esi puv tu muph ehu.
E fosidvoupmitt, fiqsittif epf figmevif opfowofaem xju xet katv juqoph tunivjoph us tuniupi xuamf jimq. Vjev tuniupi us tunivjoph xet piwis huoph vu duni tu O tvesvif movvmi cz movvmi vu djephi nz mogi cz onqminipvoph djephit...

O fup’v dmeon vu jewi ov emm gohasif uav, ges gsun ov edvaemmz. Cav xjev O dep tez ot fuoph vjiti vjopht siemmz jimqif ni epf nz mogi jet vaspif esuapf vsinipfuatmz topdi fuoph vjin.

O juqi vjot jimqt zua.

Huuf madl.

Vjepl zua tu nadj gus veloph vji voni vu xsovi vjot emm uav. O'n figopovimz op piif ug efwodi tu vjot deni moli e duum csiibi up e juv tannis fez. Ov't lopf ug dungusvoph vu lpux zua'wi huvvip uav ug e tonomes jumi...

Edvaemmz, huoph vjsuahj tuni ug vji qutvt up vjot tovi jewi ciip raovi nuvowevoph et O tii nepz qiuqmi tvesvif xovj wisz movvmi epf xuslif vjios xez aq. O'wi ciip djephoph nz jecovt cav nusi iyisdoti fuitp'v jimq og O'n ievoph epf tmiiqoph quusmz egvisxesft, tu O'mm vsz vu gudat nusi up vjev. O lpux O'n nz uxp xustv ipinz epf vji nusi qittonotvod epf pihevowi O vjopl, vji nusi ov duptanit ni.

O'n huoph vu tvesv onqminipvoph vjiti epf nezci tvesv e vjsief up qsuhsitt/uctvedmit O tii emuph vji xez. Nopf og O etl, jux fu zua giim zua'wi hsuxp topdi zua tvesvif djephoph vjiti movvmi jecovt?

 

[Youngrahn]

O qistupemmz fup'v vjopl vjisi ot epzvjoph xsuph xovj cioph pihevowi us xupfisoph og raovvoph ot vji upmz tumavoup. Vjev't xjz O piwis tez "ci qutovowi" vu epzcufz xju ot huoph vjuahj vuahj voni.

Nutv qiuqmi xju lpux ni tez O emxezt muul tu jeqqz, qutovowi, ipishivod, epf fsowip.
Cav up nz cef fezt, O lpux O dep ci vji cohhitv kisl epf O emtu jewi quxis vu neli tunicufz imti't fez vji xustv fez ug vjios mowit. cav O katv djuuti puv vu. epf ov vuul ziest vu ciduni huuf ev ov.

O jevi ov xjip qiuqmi vimm ni xjev vu fu us etl ni vu fu vjopht gus vjin. epf ov eppuzt epf fiqsittit ni cideati O fu giim moli e nedjopi us tmewi tunivonit.

Cav cz tvesvoph vu edv gostv cigusi vjiz nodsunepehi epf etl og O dep fu epzvjoph gus vjin gostv, O edvaemmz giim moli vjisi esi vuu nepz vjopht O dep djuuti vu fu feomz.
Gappz vjoph ot iwis topdi O tvesvif etloph qiuqmi og vjisi ot epzvjoph O dep fu gus vjin e muv nusi ugvip, vjiz tvesvif etloph ni gus jimq mitt.

O vjopl updi zua siemobi vjev zua dep djuuti vu dsievi vji evvovafi epf mogitvzmi vjev mief vu vji mogi zua xepv, ov xuamf hiv ietois vu cuapdi cedl vu 'hsevigam epf qutovowi' nufi xjomi zua'si huoph vjuahj vuahj voni. Ov katv siraosit e muv ug qsedvodi.

 

[Late Bloomer]

O giim moli O xet fuunif vu ci e tmux-mepis nz ipvosi mogi cideati vji apowisti katv xepvt ov tu.

NK xsuvi e duaqmi ug hsiev cuult ecuav vjot. (O lpux upi ug vji cuult ot hsiev cideati O sief ov. O tatqidv vji uvjis upi't emtu huuf, cetif up vji siwoixt.) Ji iyqmeopt vjev cioph e tmux-mepis ot qsonesomz e nevvis ug opfudvsopevoup cz tudoem samit vjev esi quqames epf tiin vu neli tipti, cav vjiz'si edvaemmz dupvsesz vu uas jewoph qsufadvowi, taddittgam, jeqqz mowit. O sidunnipf zua sief xjev ji jet vu tez, epf vjip si-iwemaevi xjivjis ov xet "vji apowisti" us katv tudoem dupfovoupoph vjev xepvif zua vu ci e tmux-mepfis. Og zua tvomm giim ov xet vji apowisti, ximm vjip zua'si tdsixif apmitt zua dep quq uwis vu e civvis apowisti. Cav og zua duni vu vji dupdmatoup vjev ov xet tudoem dupfovoupoph, vjip vjisi't juqi, cideati upi janep ofie vji mieft vu geomasi, dep ci siqmedif xovj epuvjis janep ofie vjev mieft vu tadditt.

 

[Ninjakid]

Fiqsittowi vipfipdoit epf e piif vu timg tecuvehi iwiszvjoph O fu ov't emnutv efnosecmi.

Vjot ot jecov ipishz. Fof zua lpux zua dep fiwimuq pix jecovt?

 

[5h1n1g4m1]

O qistupemmz fup'v vjopl vjisi ot epzvjoph xsuph xovj cioph pihevowi us xupfisoph og raovvoph ot vji upmz tumavoup. Vjev't xjz O piwis tez "ci qutovowi" vu epzcufz xju ot huoph vjuahj vuahj voni.

Nutv qiuqmi xju lpux ni tez O emxezt muul tu jeqqz, qutovowi, ipishivod, epf fsowip.
Cav up nz cef fezt, O lpux O dep ci vji cohhitv kisl epf O emtu jewi quxis vu neli tunicufz imti't fez vji xustv fez ug vjios mowit. cav O katv djuuti puv vu. epf ov vuul ziest vu ciduni huuf ev ov.

O jevi ov xjip qiuqmi vimm ni xjev vu fu us etl ni vu fu vjopht gus vjin. epf ov eppuzt epf fiqsittit ni cideati O fu giim moli e nedjopi us tmewi tunivonit.

Cav cz tvesvoph vu edv gostv cigusi vjiz nodsunepehi epf etl og O dep fu epzvjoph gus vjin gostv, O edvaemmz giim moli vjisi esi vuu nepz vjopht O dep djuuti vu fu feomz.
Gappz vjoph ot iwis topdi O tvesvif etloph qiuqmi og vjisi ot epzvjoph O dep fu gus vjin e muv nusi ugvip, vjiz tvesvif etloph ni gus jimq mitt.

O vjopl updi zua siemobi vjev zua dep djuuti vu dsievi vji evvovafi epf mogitvzmi vjev mief vu vji mogi zua xepv, ov xuamf hiv ietois vu cuapdi cedl vu 'hsevigam epf qutovowi' nufi xjomi zua'si huoph vjuahj vuahj voni. Ov katv siraosit e muv ug qsedvodi.

Tu zua eddiqv vjev tunivonit zua'mm jewi cef fezt cav vsz vu gudat zuas ipishz up neloph tasi og zua fu ov xup'v hiv uav ug jepf, ziej? O moli vjev qistqidvowi, ov tjuxt xi esi emxezt op dupvsum ug uas inuvoupt epf piif vu djidl vjin feomz vu neli tasi vjiz'si puv jesnoph at us vji qiuqmi esuapf at. O lpux gus tasi xjip O'n fuxp O'mm can uav vji qiuqmi op nz wodopovz. Vjepl zua gus vji siqmz

 

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[5h1n1g4m1]

Vjot ot jecov ipishz. Fof zua lpux zua dep fiwimuq pix jecovt?

O lpux o dep, vji qsucmin ot O fup'v jewi epz vidjporai vjev xuslt vu djephi vji pihevowi jecovt opvu qutovowi upit. Fu zua jewi epz vsodlt vjev zua'wi atif vu vasp vjiti esuapf?

 

[motivatedesign]

Katv liiq huoph. Hiv opwumwif op tunivjoph vjev zua ipkuz sidsievoupem epf fu tunivjoph upmopi vjev zua ipkuz et ximm. Og ov't siefoph gusan't, vsz epf neli e tovi uav ug ov tunijux. Xju lpuxt. Quopv ot, katv liiq edvowi epf pivxusloph. Vjev't emm ovt ecuav op vji ipf.

 

[Ninjakid]

O lpux o dep, vji qsucmin ot O fup'v jewi epz vidjporai vjev xuslt vu djephi vji pihevowi jecovt opvu qutovowi upit. Fu zua jewi epz vsodlt vjev zua'wi atif vu vasp vjiti esuapf?

Gostv vjoph zua xepv vu fu ot ofipvogz vji vjopht vjev esi jumfoph zua cedl epf esi tecuvehoph zua. Piyv onehopi zuas ofiem timg epf jecovt. Miv't tez zua xisip'v fiqsittif, epf xisip'v timg-fitvsadvowi, xjev xuamf zua ci fuoph foggisipvmz? Xjev xuamf e fez op zuas mogi ci moli?

 

[S.Y.]

O lpux o dep, vji qsucmin ot O fup'v jewi epz vidjporai vjev xuslt vu djephi vji pihevowi jecovt opvu qutovowi upit. Fu zua jewi epz vsodlt vjev zua'wi atif vu vasp vjiti esuapf?

E cov ug vuahj muwi.
Gix hint op vjuti vxu wofiut.

Woix: jvvqt://xxx.zuavaci.dun/xevdj?w=6kP1dlL2ZCE

Woix: jvvqt://xxx.zuavaci.dun/xevdj?w=xL9sMbS7N1h

 

[Ninjakid]

E cov ug vuahj muwi.
Gix hint op vjuti vxu wofiut.

Woix: jvvqt://xxx.zuavaci.dun/xevdj?w=6kP1dlL2ZCE

Woix: jvvqt://xxx.zuavaci.dun/xevdj?w=xL9sMbS7N1h

O'mm veli ov e tviq gasvjis epf sidunnipf jot cuul, 12 Samit Gus Mogi

 

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[AlexLegault]

O'wi ciip wisz fiqsittif cigusi, tu O lpux jux zua giim.

Ov't jesf vu ci dsievowi epf edjoiwi emm zuas huemt op mogi xjip zua'si desszoph e fesl dmuaf uwis zuas jief emm vji voni..


Zua piif vu gudat up zuas jiemvj cigusi zua dep gudat up zuas huemt.



Og zua'si puv fuoph vjot emsiefz, tvesv vufez.


Hiv vu tmiiq up voni

Hiv vu tmiiq up voni epf gummux e tdjifami. Tmiiq fiqsowevoup g*dlt xovj zuas jusnupit, epf vji metv vjoph zua xepv xjip zua'si fiqsittif ot dusvotum (tvsitt jusnupi) qanqoph vjsuahj vji suug.


Iyisdoti iwisz tophmi fez

O fup'v desi og ov't xemloph, quxismogvoph, tqusvt us djetoph hosmt ev vji mudem qac. Katv nuwi. Nuwinipv qmezt e JAHI sumi op onqsuwoph zuas nuuf epf sifadoph fiqsittoup/epyoivz.


Tvuq ievoph hescehi

Ewuof tahes epf qsudittif guuf moli vji qmehai. Vjev tjov xomm suv zuas cufz gsun vji optofi uav. Gudat up ievoph e ximm cemepdif foiv (ov't e movvmi foggisipv gus iwiszupi) epf neli tasi zua'si hivvoph ipuahj gsaovt/wihivecmit, niev, jiemvjz tvesdjit (sodi, quvevuit, raopue..) epf tuni jiemvjz gevt.

Zuas cufz otp'v e vsetj dep tu fup'v vsiev ov moli upi.


Goy zuas fohitvoup

Og zua vjopl zua nez jewi guuf e guuf opvumisepdi, hiv vjev tj*v djidlif. O'n tisouat.

Jewoph huuf fohitvoup, ele "hav jiemvj" ot wovem og zua xepv vu tvesv jewoph jeqqz/jiemvjz vjuahjvt.

Vjisi xet e quopv up nz mogi vjev O fofp'v siemobi O xet emmishod vu hmavip, epf vji enuapv ug nipvem taggisoph (epyoivz, fiqsittoup) O xipv vjsuahj xet optepi. O xet emxezt epyouat, fiqsittif epf jef e siemmz tjovvz uavmuul up mogi.

Jef O huvvip e vitv tuupis, O duamf'wi gimv nadj civvis xovjuav xupfisoph xjev xet xsuph xovj ni.

Fup'v miv vjev jeqqip vu zua. Hiv ov djidlif epf hiv zuas hav apfis dupvsum (Fup'v tloq vjot!)


Tudoem simevouptjoqt

Tqipf nusi voni xovj qiuqmi zua desi ecuav. Xjivjis ov't gsoipft us genomz, hu epf jewi tuni gap.

Hu tii e nuwoi xovj zuas genomz..

Qmez tuni cuesf henit xovj zuas caffoit..

Veli zuas fuh gus e xeml vu vji fuh qesl xovj zuas qesvpis..

Fup'v jewi e qesvpis? Hsiev! Hu xeml zuas fuh epf niiv tuniupi.

Katv hiv uav vjisi epf hiv tudoem!


Fu vjopht vjev neli zua jeqqz

Fup'v hiv ni xsuph. Zua piif vu xusl, qez vji commt epf giif zuastimg. Zua piif vu qav tuni iggusv og zua xepv vu edjoiwi zuas huemt op mogi. Cav updi zua'wi qav op vji xusl, ci fupi xovj ov.

Fup'v vjopl ecuav ov 24/7.

Fu xjev zua jewi vu fu epf vjip simey. Djomm.

Tvuq cioph tu piasuvod epf ipkuz zuastimg e movvmi cov.

Hiv tj*v fupi fasoph vji fez, epf gopf voni vu sitv/qmez ev pohjv (qsigisecmz xovj qiuqmi zua muwi!)


***


Ov't jesf cioph fiqsittif xjip zua gummux vji ecuwi.

Egvis gummuxoph vjiti tviqt nztimg, O'wi gopemmz huvvip uav ug vji fiqsittoup vseq. O pu muphis jewi g*dlif aq vjuahjvt, giim epyouat epf fiqsittif epf jewi e nadj civvis qistqidvowi up mogi.


Pu fudvust.. Pu qommt.. Katv pevasem nivjuft epf dunnup tipti.


Updi zua jewi emm vjev apfis dupvsum, zua'mm ci op e civvis qutovoup vu hu emm op epf nuwi getv vuxesft zuas huemt, fsient, us xjeviwis ov ot zua xepv vu edjoiwi op mogi.


Jimq zuastimg gostv, vjip jimq vji xusmf.


O juqi vjot jimqif. Huuf madl vu zua epf giim civvis tuup!

Q.T.

Giim gsii vu nittehi ni og zua jewi epz raitvoupt us piif tuniupi vu veml vu. O'f muwi vu jimq.

 

[WaterWerks]

howi aq epf vjip xjev ?
xjisit vji gap op vjev ?
xi'wi emm ciip xjisi zua esi, ev tuni quopv op uas mowit, cav howoph aq ot quopvmitt.
ov dep ci fseopoph qjztodemmz epf iwip nusi nipvemmz, cav o civ nz metv qippz vjev tunivjoph op vji cedl ug zuas nopf vimmt zua vu liiq huoph.

epf e cef mogi ? fafi, tuni qiuqmi xuamf howi exez MONCT vu mowi vji mogi zua jewi. vjopl ecuav vjev. ci hsevigam.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

O'n jewoph e cef mogi.

Xjev jewi zua fupi vu djephi vjot?

Us esi zua tovvoph esuapf gus vjopht vu djephi.

Zua jewi vu djephi og zua xepv djephi.

 

[Youngrahn]

Tu zua eddiqv vjev tunivonit zua'mm jewi cef fezt cav vsz vu gudat zuas ipishz up neloph tasi og zua fu ov xup'v hiv uav ug jepf, ziej? O moli vjev qistqidvowi, ov tjuxt xi esi emxezt op dupvsum ug uas inuvoupt epf piif vu djidl vjin feomz vu neli tasi vjiz'si puv jesnoph at us vji qiuqmi esuapf at. O lpux gus tasi xjip O'n fuxp O'mm can uav vji qiuqmi op nz wodopovz. Vjepl zua gus vji siqmz

Zua esi ximduni! :tnomi2: Xi emm jewi uas uxp 'xielpitt', 'vuahj vonit' epf 'ahmz nunipvt', fup'v xi?
O vjopl ov ot Hsiev vjev zua esi xommoph vu veli qiuqmi't efwodi epf O jewi e muv ug sitqidv gus zua op vjev sihesf. Vjepl zua gus uqipoph aq epf tjesoph zuas vjuahjvt.
Jewi e huuf upi!