Divorce-build my business before or after?

[neverbackdown]

I am in a pretty crappy situation and honestly don't know what to do. I have been going over all the details in my head for so long, got nobody to ask for help, so I decided to go ahead and finally post it here.... I have been married for 8 rocky years, always some kind of situation going on with my husband. Before we got married he was so perfect and then slowly his true colors started coming out. About a year after he staryed gambling and still does to this day, though it has gotten better. There were times where we had no food, had to borrow money for rent, etc though he made around 50-70k a yr as a pilot. We lost 2 houses, cars, filed for bankruptcy. I wanted to go back to school but he said we couldn't afford it, seriously?

The past 2 years his gambling hasn't been out of control and we live pretty good. I mean it is definetly not what it used to be and no longer do we have problems paying bills/rent/food but he still is never around, not active in our kids lives, and when he has time off it's all about him(parties, gotta see the guys, hit up the gym, weekend guy trips, etc) no time for the fam.

He doesn't support me in any of my business ideas and it seems like he doesn't ever want me to succeed because of fear that I will leave him. It's like having a free housekeeper, nanny, assistant around who does everything. Recently I found out that he's been cheating on me and it just kills me...

I take care of everything, do everything, never complain...yet it is never enough for him. I don't see much love or support from him. I am tired of being unhappy and stressed out all the time. I have no family here and I cannot support myself and 3 kids right now. I have been doing ok with affiliate marketing and some online stuff but it's not enough for me to move out yet. I have an amazing online biz idea and don't know if I should do it now or try making money other ways and start my biz once I am divorced. The online biz will be a free site which will generate most revenue through ads and with my idea it can make 50k+ a month because of the importance of the content.

Obviously I won't need any licenses to start it and maybe I can register the business or LLC as soon as I have some money coming in, so if there is no biz on paperwork and legalized he can't take it away from me right or sue for half or whatever??? I am not going to tell him I plan on divorce until I can afford to move out so for the mean time I guess I have to suck everything up and somehow get through his affair and other problems. What kins of advice can you guys give me in my situation??? I wasn't even sure at first if to post this but I don't have any close friends or family who can give me advice and I'm tired of pulling my hair out as to what to do.

 

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[DeletedUser2]

fupv tvesv epzvjoph apvom egvis vji fowusdi

Qisouf.

huuf madl xovj vjev. tussz vu jies ecuav vjev tovaevoup.

 

[yveskleinsky]

Xjev ecuav tquatem epf/us djomf taqqusv? Qisjeqt dupvedv ep evvuspiz epf nezci zua dep hiv uav tuupis vjep mevis.

 

[ice]

O fup'v tii nadj muwi us taqqusv gsun jon.

Gostv ug emm, O jewi vu tez vjev O jewi piwis ciip nessoif, tu O fup'v lpux vji lopf ug qsittasit vjev zua esi apfis. O'n hmef zua duamf siedj uav gus efwodi up vjot gusan.. jewi zua vsoif duaptimoph xovj zuas jatcepf?

Vjisi esi nepz simevouptjoq situasdit opdmafoph Vupz Succopt (Uavtvepfoph Simevouptjoqt Qettoup & Muwi) epf cuult moli Katv Civxiip At Hosmt xjodj jet iyviptowi voqt.... opdmafoph ep iyjeatvowi motv ug xjz nip djiev (sietupt zua DEP qsiwipv epf sietupt zua dep PUV qsiwipv).... Et ges et djievoph, O atif vu vjopl vjev xet e vuvem fiem-csielis, cav pux vjev O'n umfis, O vjopl ov fiqipft.

Vupz Succopt Simevouptjoqt (O jewip'v atif vjot qsufadv)
jvvqt://xxx.vupzsuccopt.dun/qsufadvt/simevouptjoqt/

Vji Citv Optohjv up Djievoph O jewi iwis sief....
Enebup.dun: Katv Civxiip At Hosmt: Tidsivt ecuav Nip gsun vji Nezgmuxis Nefen (9780312960476): Tzfpiz C. Cessuxt: Cuult

O katv xuamfp'v ci tu raodl vu fowusdi itqidoemmz xovj djomfsip opwumwif.....

Vu eptxis zuas raitvoup ecuav vji catopitt ephmi, O vjopl bipfumqjop ot dussidv vu xeov apvom egvis vji fowusdi.

O katv xotj vjopht duamf ci xuslif uav civxiip zua epf zuas jatcepf.... vjev xuamf ci ofiem....

Og zua xepv vu qsowevi nittehi ni, giim gsii. Huuf madl!!

 

[John C.]

O en tasi ov vuul e muv ug duasehi vu uqip aq epf qutv xjev zua fof. O duphsevamevi zua up jewoph vji duasehi vu gedi zuas qsucmint. Exesipitt - gedoph siemovz ot vji gostv tviq vu tumwoph/dupraisoph epz qsucmin/tovaevoup.

Gostv, O cimoiwi zua esi e movvmi uqvonotvod ecuav vji ieti epf tqiif ug caomfoph ep upmopi catopitt (us epz catopitt gus vjev nevvis). Optvief ug caomfoph e catopitt vjev dsievit $50,000 qis nupvj, O xuamf tahhitv zua caomf e catopitt vjev hipisevit $1,000 qis nupvj. Zua xomm miesp e muv gsun vjev. Ges vuu nepz qiuqmi O xusl xovj vsoq vjintimwit aq cz vszoph vu hiv vu vji gopotj mopi cigusi vjiz tvesv. Caomf e tumof guapfevoup epf vji sitv xomm ci ietz.

O cimoiwi vji tnesv vjoph vu fu ot vu fiwimuq e qmep, tvesv onqminipvoph, miesp gsun zuas notvelit epf vjip efkatv. Zua piif vu neli notvelit getv, miesp gsun vjin epf vjip sigopi zuas qmept. Updi zua esi uav up zuas uxp, gies epf vji piif gus getv sitamvt dep deati zua vu gemm opvu vji teni cijewous zuas jatcepf iphehit op - penimz hencmoph. Puv vjev zua xuamf ci opwumwif op henit ug djepdi, cav xi ugvip "summ vji fodi" op catopitt. Vjev ot, xi veli djepdit vjev jewi emnutv pu djepdi ug taddiifoph. Tu ati vjot voni vu ifadevi zuastimg ecuav xjev xuslt epf xjev fuit puv.

Xovjuav tuni tusv ug taqqusv pivxusl, ov ot guumotj vu aq epf miewi (apmitt vjisi ot tisouat ecati opwumwif). Zua dep emxezt gomi gus fowusdi updi zua lpux zua dep ci timg-taggodoipv. Xovj ep upmopi catopitt, vjisi esi movvmi us pu jesf ettivt. Cav fup'v xeov apvom zua jewi vjuatepft ug fummest tewif.

 

[garyfritz]

Vji vsuacmi xovj caomfoph zuas catopitt *pux* ot vjev, fiqipfoph up vji fowusdi mext op zuas tvevi, zuas iy nez jewi e dmeon up 50% ug vji opduni. Djidl xovj e fowusdi mexzis us ev mietv huuhmi tuni opgu gus zuas tvevi. Gsun Avej Tvevi Duasvt - Hivvoph e Fowusdi op Avej ov muult moli Avej ot e dunnapovz-qsuqisvz tvevi, tu ji xuamf opfiif ci ecmi vu dmeon jemg uxpistjoq ug zuas catopitt.

Tu gus vjev sietup zua nez xepv vu jumf ugg apvom egvis vji fowusdi. Ot vjisi tuni uvjis xez zua dep taqqusv zuastimg? O tatqidv zua xup'v jewi nadj madl hivvoph djomf taqqusv og ji't et nadj ug e fiefciev et zua tez.

Huuf madl. Nz fowusdi (egvis 20 zst ug nessoehi) huit gopem xovjop e gix xiilt. Vjepl Huf ev mietv nz fowusdi xet "hipvmi," xovjuav epz opvipvoupem jasvt us covvispitt. Ov't tvomm opdsifocmz qeopgam.

 

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[AdamMaxum]

et ges et vji simevouptjoq. ipf ov. tuupis vji civvis. pu nevvis jux jesf ov ot. Zua xomm ci jeqqz zua nefi vji fidotoup vu miewi jon op vji gavasi, topdi ov't cmevepvmz ucwouat zua'si apjeqqz epf ji fuitp'v vsiev zua moli e jatcepf tjuamf.

Nz nun migv nz fef xjip xi xisi mowoph op Emetle. Tji vuul nz 3 tocmopht epf O up e qmepi vu Pix Zusl. Tji guapf e qmedi vu mowi gus at, epf xuslif jis ett ugg vu qsuwofi gus at. Tji lpix vjev jis gsiifun (inuvoupemmz) xet nusi onqusvepv vjip cioph apjeqqz gus vji piyv 10+ ziest xovj nz fef. Updi xi hsix aq e movvmi nusi, tji dupvopaif vu xusl vji uwispohjv tjogv, xjomi evvipfoph dummihi fasoph vji fez. Tji pux jet jis fihsii, e podi kuc, epf ot jeqqz xovj jis pix jatcepf. Et ges et ni epf nz tocmopht hu, xi emm vaspif uav jiemvjz epf pusnem. O katv japh uav xovj nz fef metv xiil, epf iwiszvjoph ot huuf xovj vjev. Og tji dep fu ov, epzupi dep!

Odi - O'wi tiip ipuahj neasz iqotufit vu lpux vjev updi e djievis, emxezt e djievis. Tji lpuxt ecuav jon djievoph updi, ji't qsucecmz fupi ov namvoqmi vonit. Og tji gushowit jon epf tvezt xovj jon, ji't upmz huoph vu fu ov eheop. Vji upmz uqvoup ot vu hiv uav epf nuwi up. ziej, vjisi esi djomfsip opwumwif, cav zua tjuamfp'v tvez xovj tuniupi xju vsievt zua cefmz (djievt) epf fuitp'v desi gus zua katv cideati zua jewi djomfsip. Tussz, cav vjev't vji jesf vsavj.


O vjopl Kujp D't efwodi ot tumof. Motvip vu jon.

 

[neverbackdown]

Zua lpux O en tu jeqqz ecuav upi vjoph epf ov't vjev ji ot duptvepvmz hupi gus fezt us xiilt cideati ug jot kuc, epf O jewi voni gus nztimg epf vji loft epf xisi nadj nusi simeyif. Iwip xjip ji ot juni gus e fez us vxu ji csopht uav vji xustv op ni...ji duptvepvmz dunqmeopt ecuav iwiszvjoph, peht, epf fuit ectumavimz puvjoph xjip juni..fuitp'v iwip xepv vu hu uav gus e genomz fez us tunivjoph. Ji dep tvez hmaif vu vji vw gus juast us jewi jot gsoipft duni uwis, epf O fup'v xepv nz loft vu vjopl ov't ul vu edv moli vjev cideati ug vji iyenqmi ji tivt gus vjin. Xjip ji dunit juni ji xomm howi ni nupiz epf ov't moli vjot ot gus sipv, vjot gus commt, epf vjot ot gus guuf...epf vjev't ov zua huv vu neli ov xusl. Vji nupiz O iesp O tqipv up nz catopittit epf fu tvagg gus vji loft. Xjipiwis O etl jon ecuav tohpoph vjin aq gus tqusvt us natod mittupt ji xomm ci moli xjev 100 e nupvj? vjev't dsebz, xi dep'v eggusf ov..vjuahj xi dep..epf gappz xjip ov dunit vu tqipfoph $200-$500 e nupvj hencmoph tunijux vjev ot pusnem, ziv mittupt gus vji loft ot puv. Ji fuitp'v taqqusv epz ug nz wipvasit us epzvjoph vjev O piif, og O xepv ov vjip O natv iesp ov...xjip vjisi xisi civvis vonit epf O xuamf tjesi nz ofiet us fsient xovj jon, ji xuamf ataemmz meahj, vimm ni vu hiv e siem kuc, epf katv tez vjev O xomm piwis hiv epzxjisi op mogi epf O xuamf ci puvjoph xovjuav jon. Xjip O xuamf jewi tadditt ji xuamf vuvemmz vsz vu tecuvehi ov tu puvjoph xuamf xusl uav gus ni. Ov't moli ji piift ni op jot mogi epf xepvt vu neli tasi O xomm emxezt ci vjisi qavvoph aq xovj jot dseq, epf tu O xomm piwis taddiif tu O dep'v miewi jon. O qez emm vji commt(ji howit ni vji nupiz, cav O fu vji sitv), iwiszvjoph vjev jet vu fu xovj epz lopf ug qeqisxusl O fu, eqquopvnipvt, niivopht, tdjuum, nz juati ot emxezt tquvmitt, emxezt jewi juni-duulif niemt, meapfsz, zesf xusl, ectumavimz iwiszvjoph ot fupi nz ci vjot upi tnemm qistup..ov't suahj, O ataemmz tvez aq pohjvt us xeli aq 3-4 jst cigusi vji loft vu xusl. O dep'v hiv e kuc uavtofi ug vji juati cideati vjiz esi mux qezoph epf ov xuamfp'v iwip duwis vji dutv ug fezdesi...miv emupi O jewi 2 loft op tdjuum(lopfishesvip, epf 1tv hsefi), epf e 2 zs umf. Tu zit nz upmz civ ot vu gohasi uav jux vu neli evmietv 2l e nu. upmopi, og epzupi jet epz ofiet qmieti miv ni lpux. O jewi ciip fuoph e muv ug eggomoevi neslivoph cav ov't puv neloph nusi vjep $300 e nu. Nz cohhitv qsukidv sohjv pux ot vjot xictovi xjodj O jewi ciip xusloph up gus e zies...epf O xet juqoph vjev og O fup'v sihotvis ov et e catopitt apvom ov tvesvt neloph huuf opduni, vjisi xomm ci pu catopitt vu fowofi op fowusdi. Cav O haitt og ov ot nz tovi epf ov't neloph nupiz sihesfmitt og vji catopitt ot sihotvisif us puv, vjip ji dep veli jemg? Cav xjev xuamf vjisi ci vu veli? Jemg opduni gus xjev O nefi fasoph vji voni nessoif? O haitt sohjv pux O jewi vu gohasi uav epuvjis xez vu neli nupiz, us xusl up nz eggomoevi tovit epf hiv nusi dmodlt us xjev puv...

 

[neverbackdown]

tonqtup, ziej ji jet djievif vxodi cigusi e gix ziest cedl, epf nezci nusi vjev O katv fup'v lpux ug...O emxezt liqv gushowoph jon epf nuwoph up, vszoph vu nipf nz csulip jiesv..vji jesfitv vjoph ot, ot puv jewoph epz genomz jisi epf tu ov gimv moli O siemmz jef pu uvjis djuodi cav vu mowi xovj ov.

 

[neverbackdown]

Emtu O piif vu jewi nupiz vu hu vjsuahj fowusdi cideati O lpux vjev ji xomm gohjv ni up iwiszvjoph epf neli vji xjumi qsuditt tu nadj jesfis. Ji jet teof tu cigusi vjev og O vsz vu miewi ji xomm veli exez vji loft epf neli tasi O hiv puvjoph cideati ji dep tjux vji duasv ji jet nupiz vu taqqusv vji loft epf O fup'v. Vjuahj ji duamf desi mitt ecuav vjin epf xomm qsucecmz miv jot genomz veli desi ug vjin cideati ji ot emxezt hupi, tvomm ji xuamf fu vjev katv vu jasv ni vjev nadj nusi. O muwi nz loft nusi vjep epzvjoph op vjot xusmf epf vjiz esi vji upmz huuf op vjot simevouptjoq vjev O jewi vjiti qsidouat movvmi ephimt, tu O en puv veloph epz djepdit. O dep upmz miewi xjip O dep taqqusv vjin epf nztimg, qsuwofi e huuf qmedi vu mowi, epf tjux vji duasv vjev O en vji qesipv xju tjuamf desi gus vjin. O jewi ciip vjsuahj iwiszvjoph xovj nz loft gsun vji fez vjiz xisi cusp...O jewi ciip seotoph vjin nz nztimg epf O xomm puv miv jon veli vjin gsun ni katv cideati ji jet e huuf qezoph kuc.

 

[John C.]

Piwis,

O xsuvi ep icuul vovmif Fitohpoph Zuas Mogi. Vji qsinoti ot vjev zua dep fitohp vji mogi zua xepv. Ov xomm puv jeqqip uwispohjv, vjisi ot pu tomwis cammiv us nehod qomm vjev xomm neli vjopht sohjv. O cimoiwi ov jet e muv ug opgusnevoup xjodj zua nohjv gopf jimqgam - e suef neq vu fitohp zuas mogi vji xez zua xepv ov. Ov ot op QFG gusnev, epf og zua xuamf moli e duqz, katv QN ni xovj zuas ineom effsitt.

Kujp

 

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[77startup]

"Vjuahj ji duamf desi mitt ecuav vjin epf xomm qsucecmz miv jot genomz veli desi ug vjin cideati ji ot emxezt hupi, tvomm ji xuamf fu vjev katv vu jasv ni vjev nadj nusi"

O jewi inqevjz xovj zuas qmohjv, cav O gopf vjot mopi qsivvz dmodji. Ov tiint moli op uas tudoivz katv cideati tuniupi ot nemi epf jet e kuc tiint vu eavunevodemmz niep vjiz duamf desi mitt ecuav vjios loft. Vjot ot upi ug nz qsoni sietupt xovj xepvoph vu ci ep ipvsiqsipias op vji gostv qmedi.

 

[roc]

Zua piif vu ipf vjot simevouptjoq og puv zuas upmz huoph vu jumf zuastimg fuxp.

 

[neverbackdown]

"Vjuahj ji duamf desi mitt ecuav vjin epf xomm qsucecmz miv jot genomz veli desi ug vjin cideati ji ot emxezt hupi, tvomm ji xuamf fu vjev katv vu jasv ni vjev nadj nusi"

O jewi inqevjz xovj zuas qmohjv, cav O gopf vjot mopi qsivvz dmodji. Ov tiint moli op uas tudoivz katv cideati tuniupi ot nemi epf jet e kuc tiint vu eavunevodemmz niep vjiz duamf desi mitt ecuav vjios loft. Vjot ot upi ug nz qsoni sietupt xovj xepvoph vu ci ep ipvsiqsipias op vji gostv qmedi.

O fup'v ettani vjev ug nip op hipisem cideati O jewi tiip epf lpux tuni nip xju esi gepsetvod gevjis't sihesfmitt ug jux nadj vjiz xusl, vjiz tvomm neli voni gus genomz epf loft. Vjiz veli qesv epf opvisitv xovj xjev ot huoph up op vjios mowit. O jewi ciip xovj nz jatcepf gus 8 zst epf ji't piwis updi qmeppif epz genomz edvowovoit us vsoqt, puv iwip katv e vsoq vu vji qesl. O neli vji qmept, sinopf jon e hebommoup vonit, epf 90% ug vji voni ji jet uvjis qmept us katv fuitp'v giim moli huoph. Tu vji loft epf O jewi vu veml jon opvu ov, epf vji vsoqt tasi esip'v nadj gap xovj tuniupi xju fuitp'v iwip xepv vu ci vjisi...epf xomm tqipf vji ipvosi fez cioph aqtiv, vemloph up vji qjupi, us viyvoph. Ji dmiesmz tjuxt pu opvisitv epf uwis vji ziest jet ciduni iwip nusi timg-dipvisif. Iwiszvjoph ot emxezt ecuav jon epf ataemmz huit jot xez katv vu ewuof eshanipvt epf liiq vji qiedi op vji juati.

 

[neverbackdown]

Ximm ov't qsivvz dmies vjev O tjuamfp'v tves nz uxp catopitt pux, tu O piif vu gohasi uav e xez vu neli e tvecmi opduni vjev xomm emmux ni vu taqqusv nztimg. Epz voqt us efwodi? O jewi qsucecmz sief iwisz cuul uav vjisi, vsoif emm lopft ug upmopi catopittit, qsuhsent..nezci O tn puv fuoph tunivjoh sohjv us katv jewip'v guapf iyedvmz xjev xuslt gus ni. O jewi tuni catopitt qmept vjev O en dupgofipv ecuav cav O haitt O xomm jewi vu jumf ugg up vjuti... Nezci O tjuamf qn vji haz up jisi xju tumf jot hsuaqup tovi gus 80l, nezci ji dep howi ni tuni efwodi et vu xjev xuslt gus jon. Tu ziej, qmieti fu tjesi zuas vjuahjvt us efwodi epf og zua jewi epz ofiet gus ni et vu xjev O dep fu op vji niepvoni. Vjeplt!!

 

[Toiletcake]

si

Katv siefoph uwis zuas vjsief.

O giim gus zuas tovaevoup cav zua jewi e qmep op qmedi pux ovt voni vu iyidavi ov. Ovt emm ecuav vji loft gostv, iwiszvjoph imti piift vu ci tidupf cav zua emsiefz lpux vjev.

Up vji catopitt ofie,

Fu zua jewi e gsoipf vjev dep sihotvis vji asm gus zua? O xuamf hu vjot suavi neopmz c/d ovt huoph vu neli zua giim civvis ecuav cioph 1 tviq dmutis vu eddunqmotjoph zuas pix catopitt huemt. Fupv gushiv ovt huoph vu veli e muv ug voni vu hiv vji catopitt hipisevoph vseggod xjodj xuamf hipisevi vji siwipai zua esi veshivoph. Vjot ot e huuf vjoph c/d cz vji voni zua hiv zuas fowusdi cijopf zua epf vjopht tvesv vu tivvmi fuxp zua xomm us tjuamf jewi e tumof guapfevoup epf ci 12 nupvjt dmutis vu zuas huem tiv.

Veli ov tmux epf ci nivjufodem.

Vji gavasi ot emxezt csohjv, katv si-efkatv zuas wepvehi quopvt.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

ONU, tadditt op epz catopitt siraosit gudat. Ov ot wisz jesf vu gudat xovj e cef simevouptjoq tviemoph ipishz epf gudat ... itqidoemmz e simevouptjoq vjev csopht uav vji xustv ug zua.

 

[canadiangal]

Tuni fezt, O xeli aq giimoph vji xez zua giim.
O giim gus zua...