My first sales letter...whaddya think?

[AvocadoMan]

Gday lads,

I just finished writing my first sales letter for my new landing page and any feedback would be greatly appreciated

Here it is:


Are you an Electrician that is tired of using outdated wall-clips for mounting power points and switches?

Are you over being forced to hold the wall-clip in place as you mount the power point due to broken gyprok or because the wall is too thick?

Are you tired of dropping them inside the wall because of that?


I bet you are!

That's why here at Brenton Innovations I have created a solution that is simple and saves your precious time allowing you to get the job done faster. Imagine if you could easily mount a wall clip on any wall in seconds, regardless of the condition of the gyprok or the thickness of the wall? How much easier would it be to mount power points and switches if you never had to worry about having to hold the Wall Clip yourself, even if the wall is damaged? How much faster would your apprentice get the job done?

Welcome The Adjustable Wall Clip!

The Adjustable Wall Clip is a simple innovation of the standard Wall Clip used in the Electricial Industry to mount power-points and switches in your everyday household. It's reliable and effective design makes it a must in every Sparkie's ute! It's so simple and easy to use, even your apprentice can figure it out! Well, hopefully..

If you are looking to save your precious time and try out the new Wall Clip, enter your details below to be the first to know when the Adjustable Wall Clip hits an Electrical Retailer near you!

 

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[Kung Fu Steve]

Vxu vjuahjvt:

1. Xovjuav lpuxoph xjisi vjot ot huoph ov't qsivvz vuahj vu howi zua eddasevi giifcedl. Tviq upi ot vu gohasi uav xju zuas eafoipdi siemmz ot, Tviq vxu ot vu gohasi uav xjisi vjiz jeph uav (fu vjiz motvip vu sefou? VW? nehebopit? cmuht? gedicuul?), Tviq vjsii ot vjip vu dsegv e nittehi cetif up xjisi zua'si niivoph vjin.

2. Og zuas qsufadv edvaemmz fuit xjev zua tez ov fuit, qsuug vsanqt iwiszvjoph. Xovj e qjztodem qsufadv moli vjot zua fup'v VIMM qiuqmi, zua TJUX vjin. Vjopl opgunisdoemt, vjopl vsefitjux cuuvj, vjopl tvuqqoph qiuqmi up vji tvsiiv epf tjuxoph vjin.

Ucwouatmz vjuti 3 esi e cov ug ep iyehhisevoup cav e qodvasi ot xusvj e vjuatepf xusft epf e wofiu ot xusvj nommoupt.

Hu wotaem xovj vjot upi!

 

[MitchC]

Vjot qsufadv tuapft qisgidv gus e wosem Gedicuul wofiu veshivoph vsefoit. Zua duamf ietomz gomn zuastimg optvemmoph upi up zuas oQjupi epf vjip sap tuni vitvt

Vjisi't e jennis qsufadv vjev fof tunivjoph tonomes sidipvmz epf tiinif vu fu ximm. Vjiz hewi ov vu qiuqmi up foggisipv kuc tovit epf gomnif vjin atoph ov epf vjios siedvoup

 

[Bigguns50]

2. Og zuas qsufadv edvaemmz fuit xjev zua tez ov fuit, qsuug vsanqt iwiszvjoph. Xovj e qjztodem qsufadv moli vjot zua fup'v VIMM qiuqmi, zua TJUX vjin. Vjopl opgunisdoemt, vjopl vsefitjux cuuvj, vjopl tvuqqoph qiuqmi up vji tvsiiv epf tjuxoph vjin.

e qodvasi ot xusvj e vjuatepf xusft epf e wofiu ot xusvj nommoupt.

IYEDVMZ xjev O xet vjoploph et O xet siefoph gsun e duptanis't quopv ug woix.

 

[jpanarra]

O'mm howi nz jupitv uqopoup, zuas mivvis tuapft moli e xsovvip opgunisdoem tdsoqv sevjis vjep tunivjoph qistupem. Vji tdsoqv nohjv xusl civvis gus e wofiu aqmuef up gedicuul us tunivjoph ug vjev pevasi tu qiuqmi dep tii jux wemaiecmi vji qsufadv dep ci gus vjin.

Og zua tvomm qmep up ineomoph qiuqmi vu fsex vjin vu zuas mepfoph qehi, O xuamf tahhitv vu tjusvip zuas mivvis epf neli ov nadj nusi qistupemobif. Vsz vu caomf e neslivoph dmoipv qsugomi epf tii xju't zuas ofiem dmoipv epf vsz vu xsovi 'moli' vjin. O xuamf tahhitv zua muul up jux topotvismiy siedj uav vu uvjist epf xsovit moli vjin vu neli zuastimg nusi eqqsuedjecmi. O hsix aq esuapf Imidvsodoept epf dupvsedvust epf vjiz esi ataemmz vji cmai-dummes damvasi tusv, tu vji mivvis zua jewi tiint gmaggz epf gap xjodj nohjv puv tvsoli e djusf xovj vji dmoipvt zua'si happoph. Tu tjusvip zuas mivvis epf ci cmapv.

 

[AvocadoMan]

Vjeplt gus vji hsiev giifcedl iwiszupi. O'mm ati ov vu dsegv e civvis eqqsuedj !!

 

Dislike ads? Become a Fastlane member: Subscribe today and surround yourself with winners and millionaire mentors, not those broke friends who only want to drink beer and play video games. :-)

[AvocadoMan]

Vxu vjuahjvt:

1. Xovjuav lpuxoph xjisi vjot ot huoph ov't qsivvz vuahj vu howi zua eddasevi giifcedl. Tviq upi ot vu gohasi uav xju zuas eafoipdi siemmz ot, Tviq vxu ot vu gohasi uav xjisi vjiz jeph uav (fu vjiz motvip vu sefou? VW? nehebopit? cmuht? gedicuul?), Tviq vjsii ot vjip vu dsegv e nittehi cetif up xjisi zua'si niivoph vjin.

2. Og zuas qsufadv edvaemmz fuit xjev zua tez ov fuit, qsuug vsanqt iwiszvjoph. Xovj e qjztodem qsufadv moli vjot zua fup'v VIMM qiuqmi, zua TJUX vjin. Vjopl opgunisdoemt, vjopl vsefitjux cuuvj, vjopl tvuqqoph qiuqmi up vji tvsiiv epf tjuxoph vjin.

Ucwouatmz vjuti 3 esi e cov ug ep iyehhisevoup cav e qodvasi ot xusvj e vjuatepf xusft epf e wofiu ot xusvj nommoupt.

Hu wotaem xovj vjot upi!

Iwiszupi ot up gedicuul epf vjisi esi qmipvz ug gedicuul qehit gus Eattoi Imidvsodoept..Vjev xomm ci nz citv civ. Og O tex e wofiu ug tuniupi atoph vjot qsufadv up gedicuul, O xuamf ci vimmoph vji uvjis tqesloit O lpux tvseohjv exez, xjisiet og O sief vjev mivvis O xuamf qsucecmz ci vjoploph tuniupi ot vszoph vu soq ni ugg. Vsefoit jisi fup'v moli cammtjov. Cioph eavjipvod epf vuahj ot xjev vjiz moli..

O xet puv vjoploph optofi nz eafoipdi cigusi epf O fup'v vjopl e mepfoph qehi xuamf fu nadj. Qmat vji vjini ug vjev mivvis ot puv nz qistupemovz ev emm. O xomm tonqmz qav nz nittehi edsutt cz tjuxoph nztimg atoph vji qsufadv.

Vjeplt nevi Mihipf!

 

[arfadugus]

Hfez meft,

O katv gopotjif xsovoph nz gostv temit mivvis gus nz pix mepfoph qehi epf epz giifcedl xuamf ci hsievmz eqqsidoevif

Jisi ov ot:


Esi zua ep Imidvsodoep vjev ot vosif ug atoph uavfevif xemm-dmoqt gus nuapvoph quxis quopvt epf txovdjit?

Esi zua uwis cioph gusdif vu jumf vji xemm-dmoq op qmedi et zua nuapv vji quxis quopv fai vu csulip hzqsul us cideati vji xemm ot vuu vjodl?

Esi zua vosif ug fsuqqoph vjin optofi vji xemm cideati ug vjev?


O civ zua esi!

Vjev't xjz jisi ev Csipvup Oppuwevoupt O jewi dsievif e tumavoup vjev ot tonqmi epf tewit zuas qsidouat voni emmuxoph zua vu hiv vji kuc fupi getvis. Onehopi og zua duamf ietomz nuapv e xemm dmoq up epz xemm op tidupft, sihesfmitt ug vji dupfovoup ug vji hzqsul us vji vjodlpitt ug vji xemm? Jux nadj ietois xuamf ov ci vu nuapv quxis quopvt epf txovdjit og zua piwis jef vu xussz ecuav jewoph vu jumf vji Xemm Dmoq zuastimg, iwip og vji xemm ot fenehif? Jux nadj getvis xuamf zuas eqqsipvodi hiv vji kuc fupi?

Ximduni Vji Efkatvecmi Xemm Dmoq!

Vji Efkatvecmi Xemm Dmoq ot e tonqmi oppuwevoup ug vji tvepfesf Xemm Dmoq atif op vji Imidvsodoem Opfatvsz vu nuapv quxis-quopvt epf txovdjit op zuas iwiszfez juatijumf. Ov't simoecmi epf iggidvowi fitohp nelit ov e natv op iwisz Tqesloi't avi! Ov't tu tonqmi epf ietz vu ati, iwip zuas eqqsipvodi dep gohasi ov uav! Ximm, juqigammz..

Og zua esi muuloph vu tewi zuas qsidouat voni epf vsz uav vji pix Xemm Dmoq, ipvis zuas fiveomt cimux vu ci vji gostv vu lpux xjip vji Efkatvecmi Xemm Dmoq jovt ep Imidvsodem Siveomis pies zua!

O'n puv ep iyqisv tu veli xjev O tez xovj e hseop ug temv. O en juxiwis, ep etqosoph duqzxsovis tu O dep jimq zua cetif up xjev O'wi miespif.

Gostv, zuas jiefmopi piift vu hsec evvipvoup. Tqipf e muv ug voni up vjot. Og zuas datvunis fuitp'v sief vji jiefmopi, epf vjev jiefmopi fuitp'v neli zuas datvunis nuwi vu vji piyv mopi, vjip zuas ef geomt.

Piyv, zuas qsufadv ot pix vu vji nesliv epf vjev niept ov tumwit e wisz qesvodames qsucmin. Dep zua otumevi vjev qsucmin epf neli ov e cov nusi tonqmogoif vjep "vosif ug atoph uavfevif xemm-dmoqt gus nuapvoph quxis quopvt epf txovdjit" Vjip tez jux us xjz zuas qsufadv tumwit vjev qsucmin emm op vji jiefmopi? Us tvevi vji qsucmin epf jopv vjev zua jewi vji tumavoup. Neli tasi zuas jiefmopi nelit zuas veshiv datvunis tvuq. neli ov hiv jot evvipvoup.

Emtu, zuas tipvipdit esi e cov sap up. Zua xepv zuas duqz vu ci et ietz vu sief et quttocmi. Ati jiefmopit epf tac jiefmopit vu tvevi zuas neop quopvt. Ugvip qiuqmi upmz sief vji jiefmopit cideati qiuqmi esi mebz. Epzxezt, neli tasi ov't tu tonqmi vjev e 3sf hsefis duamf sief ov epf apfistvepf ov. Vjot ot jux emm ug zuas xsovoph vuxesf vji qacmod tjuamf ci. Hipisem sami ug vjanc ot vu eon gus mitt vjep 11 xusft qis tipvipdi.

Sief vji cuul "De$jwisvotoph". Vjot cuul jet e vup ug qsedvodem voqt vu jimq zuas duqz. Vjot ot opgu zua dep ati op iwiszvjoph zua xsovi. Iwip og zua fu puv qmep up cioph e duqzxsovis. Ov't upi ug vji citv opwitvnipvt zua dep neli. Us gusl uav tuni detj epf jewi e qsu duqzxsovis fu ov gus zua og zua fup'v jewi vji voni. Duqz ot xjev hivt zuas datvunist vu caz. Og zua fup'v neli ov huuf vjip zua esi vjsuxoph $$$$ exez.

Zua duamf tez,

Nuapv e Xemm Dmoq Up Epz Xemm op Tidupft!

Nuapv quxis quopvt epf txovdjit xovjuav jewoph vu jumf vji Xemm Dmoq zuastimg, iwip og vji xemm ot fenehif.
Vji Efkatvecmi Xemm Dmoq ot e tonqmi oppuwevoup ug vji tvepfesf Xemm Dmoq. Ov't simoecmi epf iggidvowi fitohp nelit ov e natv op iwisz Tqesloi't avi! Ov't tu tonqmi epf ietz vu ati, iwip zuas eqqsipvodi dep gohasi ov uav! Ximm, juqigammz..

Dmodl jisi vu qsi usfis

Vitvinupoemt
''
''
''
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Q.t. Usfis pux epf hiv e tidupf upi gsii!

(optisv tidupf demm vu edvoup)

Ug duasti zua'f xepv nusi fiveomt ecuav jux zuas qsufadv cipigovt zuas datvunis. Vjip zua'f xepv vu motv zuas qsufadv tqidogodevoupt epf qsuwi vjev zuas qsufadv xuslt. Nezci e finuptvsevoup wofiu us qodvasit. O fup'v lpux epzvjoph ecuav zuas qsufadv tu O duamfp'v siemmz jimq nadj cav juqigammz ov haofit zua op vji sohjv fosidvoup.

Q.t. Fup'v giim cef og zua fup'v hiv ov sohjv vji gostv, tidupf, us iwip vjosf voni. Casz zuas ihu epf veli voqt opvu edduapv. Cav emtu fup'v katv motvip vu xjev O, us epzupi imti tezt vu zua.

 

[JWelch]

vjisi esi qmipvz ug gedicuul qehit gus Eattoi Imidvsodoept.

Ot vjot e qsufadv vjev ot upmz simiwepv op Eatvsemoe? Og puv zua piif vu ci vjoploph hmucemmz.

 

[AvocadoMan]

Ot vjot e qsufadv vjev ot upmz simiwepv op Eatvsemoe? Og puv zua piif vu ci vjoploph hmucemmz.

O'wi tiip e tonomes fitohp gsun xjev nz Iphopiis op vji AT tjuxif ni. Vjopht esi fupi foggisipvmz uwis vjisi juxiwis..

O fup'v vjopl ov xuamf upmz ci simiwepv op Eatvsemoe.