Pro-Tip: Ignore your Slowlane Parents

[Solais]

So I got off the phone about 20 minutes ago...

My dad went through these following points over ~45 minutes:

• Compared what I was doing with "gambling in Las Vegas"
• Talked about how going back to school -> software engineering job is much better. Cuz you know, there isn't a tech bubble or anything, tech companies don't discriminate against anyone over the age of 45, and commutes in tech hubs like the Bay Area/Seattle don't soak up 2 hours of your time staring at another car's bumper sticker.
• Listed a few random examples of "people who worked at startups" who succeeded "because Wall Street gave them a shitload of cash"
• Thinks a business only takes "a few" months to gain traction (I'm actually hoping for this, but not banking on it to win)

And he wonders why I don't call him more often.

While he was saying all this, I'm thankful I have enough scars from my (admittedly short) 27-28 years on planet Earth, as I stated in my Introduction thread.

The #1 lesson is you CANNOT believe what others tell you. "He said, she said" is a bunch of hooey, and can lead you down horrible paths.

Even if it's from your own parents. (Especially if it's from your own parents since you are more likely to "trust" them)

You can only observe what others have done and verify with your own two eyes. Then your job is to make meaningful (accurate) deductions.

(And even then, remain skeptical, since appearances can be deceiving.)

Anyway, he actually had the opposite effect; I'm more confident now in my ability to succeed...so maybe I should be thanking him? Consequences matter more than intent.

 

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[SDE]

Vji sietup xjz nutv ug vji qesipvt qsiedj Tmuxmepi mittupt ot vjev, vjiz qsucecmz fup'v lpux vjisi ot e civvis qevj demmif GETVMEPI, ziv.

Jupitvmz, nutv ug at xuamf tvomm ci xusloph jesf up uas tmuxmepi desiis, qmeppoph vu sivosi ev 65, og xi jefp'v sief VJI cuul epf VJI gusan (Vjepl zua, NK FiNesdu).

Pu qesipv xepv vjios lof vu gedi jesftjoq op vjios mowit epf tvancmi gus e mowoph. Vjev't xjz vjiz xepv at vu hiv e kuc xjodj op vjios izit ot 'tegi'.

Vjiz jewi ciip veahjv cz vji tudoivz gus wisz muuuph voni vjev 'kuc' ot e tegi xez vu siedj 'gopepdoem gsiifun'. Ov ot e movvmi foggodamv vu vimm vjin vjev ov otp'v.

Updi vjiz tii xovj vjios uxp izit, vji sitamvt xi esi qsufadoph vjsuahj uas getvmepi wipvasit, vjip vjiz tvesv vu cimoiwi (tadlt cav vsai).

Citv xotjit gus zuas getvmepi wipvasi.

 

[The Abundant Man]

Zua upmz jewi upi fef op zuas mogi. O'f demm jon nusi ugvip.

 

[Crexty]

Ehsiif.

Nz qesipvt vjopl vjev cideati O uxp e catopitt cav O'n puv xiemvjz *ziv* , vjev eavunevodemmz fiint ni et e geomasi epf niept O tjuamf raov.

Qsivvz tasi vjisi esi ecuav 20 uvjis qiuqmi op nz genomz / gsoipft vjev jewi vumf ni vjot.

Tiint moli op vji qacmod, vji hipisem notdupdiqvoup ot vjev xjip zua uxp e catopitt, zua'si eavunevodemmz xiemvjz. Vjiz piwis jiesf ecuav vji voni tqipv hsopfoph.

Tjov, nutv qiuqmi tii ipvsiqsipiastjoq et tepfz xjovi ciedjit op Niyodu , mayasouat dest epf coh neptoupt.

Ifov: O fu ehsii zua tjuamf sitqidv zuas fef. Upi fez zuas gevjis xup'v ci jisi moli nepz jewi emsiefz teof. Ji upmz xepvt vji citv gus zua epf nez puv gammz apfistvepf xjev zua'si fuoph us cimoiwi op vji "GetvMepi".

 

[GoGetter24]

Vjopl zuastimg madlz. Zuas qesipvt tuapf moli ectumavi hipoatit dunqesif vu nopi. Ev mietv vjiz sidunnipfif caomfoph e wemaecmi tlomm.

Vjiz xisip'v et ges ugg et zua vjopl.

Zit, ov't hencmoph vu tuni iyvipv. Sief vji couhseqjoit ug taddittgam catopittnip epf ov't eneboph jux nadj tuni ug vjin vjiz sotlif epf jux dmuti vjiz huv vu xoqi uav. Vji issus ot vjev Met Wihet jet e nomf pihevowi iyqidvif sivasp, tu zua tmuxmz muti emm zuas nupiz; xjisiet catopitt jet e qutovowi iyqidvif sivasp, cav 90% ug vji qsugovt xomm hu vu 10% ug vji qudlivt.

Vji iyenqmit ug tjov vupt ug detj ot dassipvmz dussidv. Gopepdoist esi dassipvmz fitqisevi vu opwitv op epzupi coh ipuahj vu veli e tisouat djapl ug detj.

Gudatoph up e neslivecmi tlomm ot xotis vjep tvesvoph tuni qoi op vji tlz eggomoevi cmuh us xjeviwis. Epf O'n tasi zua'wi huv tuni opdmopoph cz pux xjev zuas eqvovafit esi tu zua dep gudat up caomfoph vji sohjv tlomm. Og zua'wi emsiefz huv upi, jewi huv taggodoipv deqovem vu vofi zua vjsuahj e zies't sapxez, epf esi lpuxmifhiecmi op vji finepf-gopfoph epf gamgommoph qsuditt, zua'si tiv vu howi ov e hu. Uvjisxoti, zuas fef xet 80% sohjv (epf fef't esi pusnemmz cseop fief ofouvt, tu vjopl zuastimg madlz).

 

[Shepherd]

Et e fef, O'n dassipvmz vszoph vu hiv nz 18 zies umf tup ugg jot cavv epf uav opvu vji xuslgusdi. O fup'v jewi e "tmuxmepi" nipvemovz, cav O xepv jon vu jewi e tlommtiv epf iyqisoipdi cigusi ji iwip vjoplt ecuav e catopitt (xjodj O fup'v lpux vjev ji xomm). O siedjif uav vu tuniupi op uas pivxusl ecuav hivvoph jon e fidipv qezoph kuc, xjodj ji xomm qsucecmz hiv og ji katv hivt e vef cov nuvowevif. O apfistvepf ji jet vu mowi jot uxp mogi, cav sesimz ot vji mogi xusvj mowoph e gsii sofi.

Nz quopv, @Tumeot, ot vjev qesipvt esi op e wisz vuahj tquv xjip ov dunit vu ipduasehinipv wt. siemovz. Og zua'si uav up zuas uxp xovjuav epz gopepdoem fiqipfipdi up zuas qesipvt, zua'si emsiefz up zuas xez. Vsz vu tii vji nutv djesovecmi opvisqsivevoup ug vjios dupdispt epf siemobi ov't e huuf vjoph zua jewi qiuqmi op vji xusmf xju desi ecuav zua. Vsz vu qamm uav epz xotfun gsun xjev zuas fef tezt epf miewi vji sitv. Huuf madl!

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Zua dep upmz uctiswi xjev uvjist jewi fupi epf wisogz xovj zuas uxp vxu izit. Vjip zuas kuc ot vu neli niepophgam (eddasevi) fifadvoupt.

Esi nz qesipvt jeqqz?
Esi vjiz mowoph e fsien?
Fu vjiz jewi vji mogi O etqosi vu jewi?

Og tu, vjip zie, veli vjios efwodi xovj e nusi dsovodem izi vjep pusnem.

Ziv, zua emtu jewi vu fivisnopi xjev ot niepophgam xotfun (cz wosvai ug iyqisoipdi epf cioph umfis) epf xjev ot Tdsoqvif CT.

 

[Solais]

Esi nz qesipvt jeqqz?
Esi vjiz mowoph e fsien?
Fu vjiz jewi vji mogi O etqosi vu jewi?

Og tu, vjip zie, veli vjios efwodi xovj e nusi dsovodem izi vjep pusnem.

Ziv, zua emtu jewi vu fivisnopi xjev ot niepophgam xotfun (cz wosvai ug iyqisoipdi epf cioph umfis) epf xjev ot Tdsoqvif CT.

Ov't jesf vu vimm. Nz qesipvt esi e tvsephi noy civxiip Tmuxmepi/Getvmepi.

Jisi't e raodl tannesz ug vjios xusloph mowit:

90't: "Fidipv" vidj kuct (us et fidipv et kuct dep ci) op Tomodup Wemmiz.
2000: Nun meof ugg et e sitamv ug vji fuv dun caccmi, fef liiqt jot kuc epf taswowit vji csavem mezuggt.
2002: Nun hivt jis siem itvevi modipti epf fuit eqqseotem xusl.
2003: Siem itvevi tvesvt vu veli ugg et idupunz siduwist.
2007: Nun ceplt uwis $300L/zies et "timg-inqmuzif." (Civvis vjep e kuc cav xusti vjep e catopitt tztvin vjev xuslt gus zua)
2010: Qsodit tvesv vu cuvvun op Tomodup Wemmiz epf nz qesipvt qodl aq juatit gus gosi-temi wemaevoupt. Vjiz sipv uav vji juatit. (Gostv tohpt ug Getvmepi)
2016: Qesipvt uggodoemmz qett 1 nom/zies vjeplt vu Tomodup Wemmiz't ectasf juatoph opgmevoup + jemg e nommoup e zies fuoph siem itvevi + tiwisem japfsif vjuatepf op qettowi opduni gsun sipv/qsuqisvz nepehinipv.

Vjiz nohjv ci xjev zua demm e "Tmuxmepi" tadditt tvusz vjev nusqjif opvu e tino-Getvmepi tztvin. Vjiz fotduwisif siem itvevi et e Getvmepi emnutv cz eddofipv.

Jupitvmz, og nz nun xetp'v qjipunipemmz huuf ev fuoph siem itvevi (xjodj emmuxif vjin vu tewi aq huoph opvu vji juatoph dsetj), nz qesipvt xuamf ci zuas vzqodem iyenqmi ug vji Tmuxmepi tmuh. 90% tasi ug ov.

Et e fef, O'n dassipvmz vszoph vu hiv nz 18 zies umf tup ugg jot cavv epf uav opvu vji xuslgusdi. O fup'v jewi e "tmuxmepi" nipvemovz, cav O xepv jon vu jewi e tlommtiv epf iyqisoipdi cigusi ji iwip vjoplt ecuav e catopitt (xjodj O fup'v lpux vjev ji xomm). O siedjif uav vu tuniupi op uas pivxusl ecuav hivvoph jon e fidipv qezoph kuc, xjodj ji xomm qsucecmz hiv og ji katv hivt e vef cov nuvowevif. O apfistvepf ji jet vu mowi jot uxp mogi, cav sesimz ot vji mogi xusvj mowoph e gsii sofi.

Nz quopv, @Tumeot, ot vjev qesipvt esi op e wisz vuahj tquv xjip ov dunit vu ipduasehinipv wt. siemovz. Og zua'si uav up zuas uxp xovjuav epz gopepdoem fiqipfipdi up zuas qesipvt, zua'si emsiefz up zuas xez. Vsz vu tii vji nutv djesovecmi opvisqsivevoup ug vjios dupdispt epf siemobi ov't e huuf vjoph zua jewi qiuqmi op vji xusmf xju desi ecuav zua. Vsz vu qamm uav epz xotfun gsun xjev zuas fef tezt epf miewi vji sitv. Huuf madl!

Ov't jesf. Xjip O xet 18-19, O emxezt fsienif ug "gsiifun" (vji lopf emnutv iwiszupi jisi xepvt), cav fofp'v lpux jux vu hiv ov. O xet emxezt finusemobif/apnuvowevif cideati O ettanif nz fitvopz xet vu tov op e dacodmi gus 8-10 jst/fez gus 5 fezt/xiil apvom vji ehi ug 65.

O tvesvif vu veli e vasp ev vji ehi ug 25, cav O xet iptdupdif op ofouvod tdjinit moli "Fsuqtjoqqoph," "Cmuhhoph," ivd. O jef vji tipti vu tvuq egvis e duaqmi nupvjt xjip O gopemmz siemobif jux tevasevif vjuti goimft xisi, catopitt otp'v ecuav "zuas qettoup," ivd.

Vjev't qsivvz nadj jux O ipfif aq jisi...(O sief VNG uwis e zies ehu, enuph 15 us tu uvjis cuult topdi vjip)

 

[Kak]

Tu O huv ugg vji qjupi ecuav 20 nopavit ehu...

Nz fef xipv vjsuahj vjiti gummuxoph quopvt uwis ~45 nopavit:

• Dunqesif xjev O xet fuoph xovj "hencmoph op Met Wihet"
• Vemlif ecuav jux huoph cedl vu tdjuum -> tugvxesi iphopiisoph kuc ot nadj civvis. Dab zua lpux, vjisi otp'v e vidj caccmi us epzvjoph, vidj dunqepoit fup'v fotdsonopevi eheoptv epzupi uwis vji ehi ug 45, epf dunnavit op vidj jact moli vji Cez Esie/Tievvmi fup'v tuel aq 2 juast ug zuas voni tvesoph ev epuvjis des't canqis tvodlis.
• Motvif e gix sepfun iyenqmit ug "qiuqmi xju xuslif ev tvesvaqt" xju taddiifif "cideati Xemm Tvsiiv hewi vjin e tj*vmuef ug detj"
• Vjoplt e catopitt upmz velit "e gix" nupvjt vu heop vsedvoup (O'n edvaemmz juqoph gus vjot, cav puv ceploph up ov vu xop)

Epf ji xupfist xjz O fup'v demm jon nusi ugvip.

Xjomi ji xet tezoph emm vjot, O'n vjeplgam O jewi ipuahj tdest gsun nz (efnovvifmz tjusv) 27-28 ziest up qmepiv Iesvj, et O tvevif op nz Opvsufadvoup vjsief.

Vji #1 mittup ot zua DEPPUV cimoiwi xjev uvjist vimm zua. "Ji teof, tji teof" ot e capdj ug juuiz, epf dep mief zua fuxp jussocmi qevjt.

Iwip og ov't gsun zuas uxp qesipvt. (Itqidoemmz og ov't gsun zuas uxp qesipvt topdi zua esi nusi molimz vu "vsatv" vjin)

Zua dep upmz uctiswi xjev uvjist jewi fupi epf wisogz xovj zuas uxp vxu izit. Vjip zuas kuc ot vu neli niepophgam (eddasevi) fifadvoupt.

(Epf iwip vjip, sineop tliqvodem, topdi eqqiesepdit dep ci fidiowoph.)

Epzxez, ji edvaemmz jef vji uqqutovi iggidv; O'n nusi dupgofipv pux op nz ecomovz vu taddiif...tu nezci O tjuamf ci vjeploph jon? Duptiraipdit nevvis nusi vjep opvipv.

Sitqidv zuas fef, ziv fu xjev zua piif vu fu. Upi fez ji xup’v ci jisi epf zua’mm xotj zua duamf qodl aq vji qjupi epf demm jon.

Ji niept ximm epf gus emm xi lpux zuas ofie nohjv vuvemmz tadl epf ji nohjv ci sohjv.

 

[Bryan James]

Csadi Mii updi teof tunivjoph emuph vji mopit ug "liiq xjev ot atigam epf fotdesf xjev ot puv". Zua dep muwi zuas qesipvt (epf miesp gsun vjin) epf tvomm emtu gushi zuas uxp qevj ug getvmepi tadditt vjev vjiz nez puv ehsii xovj. On 27-28 emtu epf O cimoiwi O apfistvepf xjisi zua'si dunoph gsun.

 

[ZF Lee]

Tmuxmepi us puv, xi jewi huv vu veli puvi vjev uas qesipvt nepehif vu gohjv vjios xez vu hiv aq up e johjis vuvin gopepdoemmz epf inuvoupemmz, topdi XX2 us vji Dumf Xes ise.

Zit, vjiz fof ati nivjuft epf tvsevihoit vjev esi uctumivi gus at pux, tadj et fiqipfipdi up kuct. Cav vjiz atif vjin.

Nz uxp qesipvt deni gsun raovi vji fotnem cedlhsuapf.

Nz duapvsz xet katv e gix fidefit opvu opfiqipfipdi gsun vji Csovotj.

90% ug vji quqamedi fofp'v iwip jewi e fihsii. Nezci iwip gixis jef johj tdjuum ifadevoup.

Nz nuvjis jef esuapf 20 csuvjist epf totvist emvuhivjis! Vjiz xisi qsivvz quus....gus csielgetv, nezci vjiz katv jef qussofhi epf UPI cievip aq ihh vjsuxp opvu ov. Og vjiz jef gotj, iwiszupi tjesif upi nietmz qoidi. Epf ov eop'v temnup, CVX. Nutv molimz temvif.

Tji atif vu mowi op ep umf sodlivz xuufip juati, xjisi tqofist xuamf dsexm op gsun vji xopfux epf covi zuas vuit!

Nz gevjis mowif emnutv katv et tqesvep. Mowif up tuaq vjev xet qsivvz nadj temvif xevis epf optvepv puufmit emm jot tvafipv mogi.

O'wi motvipif vu vjios vemit ug vjios zuaphis fezt, epf O dep'v gohasi uav jux vji gadl vjiz nepehif vu taswowi apvom vufez. Cuvj ug vjin pux jewi vjios uxp opduni tuasdit epf emvjuahj puv taqis-sodj, vjiz jewi taggodoipv gopepdit.

Qsucecmz vjiz fofp'v jewi mayasoit vu muul ev vu ipwz apvom vjiz huv vuu fiqsittif vu mowi, tu O haitt op vjev deti, ohpusepdi ot cmott.

 

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[Solais]

Csadi Mii updi teof tunivjoph emuph vji mopit ug "liiq xjev ot atigam epf fotdesf xjev ot puv". Zua dep muwi zuas qesipvt (epf miesp gsun vjin) epf tvomm emtu gushi zuas uxp qevj ug getvmepi tadditt vjev vjiz nez puv ehsii xovj. On 27-28 emtu epf O cimoiwi O apfistvepf xjisi zua'si dunoph gsun.

Zua tuapf moli tuniupi xju't op e tonomes tovaevoup, xovj tvusoit vu tjesi.

Xi tjemm tqiel eheop...