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Sleep Deprived, and in need of some advice.

Anything related to matters of the mind

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Tommy92l

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SO U GUYS NO ME N STUFF.

Just kidding, not that tired.

You guys kind of know my situation.

I work at a minimum wage job up and started back in the end of March.

I used to do videos constantly for - Youtube. I am partnered, so to speak (And I don't just mean I have the ability to turn on ads, I mean I am really partnered)

You play videogames and get paid. And if you become BIG, you get paid WELL. Well for playing videogames that is. For a couple of months I had some money saved up, it was up until march I realized I needed a job because I was running dry. I always wanted to be big on that channel. Sure, I had a few impactful videos and I am hitting around 1K subs on my channel, but I'm not doing well. Sure I've improved, but nothing that gives me hope. While that isn't thinking the "Fastlane" way, I am trying to be as positive and as realistic as possible. So back when I started my job, I got more into the fast lane, put my money into Welcome to TizeMe (That only started in around june, from March-May I was kind of just being an idiot and blowing it until I realized I was tired of working my job) and eventually just stopped doing Youtube all together. I knew that if I became BIG (Which was very well possible) the amount I'd work at a standard paying job would be laughable.

So why am I revisiting this after I stopped back in March? My buddy recently got back into it and was making some bank, he was telling me "Come on! I'll show you how to get more views!". But the thing was, I really DIDN'T like playing video games anymore. They were rendered useless to me, as a waste of time. The though of playing a video game for an hour while I could have been finding ways to get more traffic to my site was literally repulsive and I didn't even want to touch my controller. Finally, I picked it up and uploaded a few videos. Low view counts, not a lot of feedback, but I already have a partnership. The opportunity to make money is there, but the views are not. So I thought to myself "Hm, I'm not TOO good at multitasking", but here is my plan.

Continue working the 2 jobs I have now. 1 is the standard one, and the other is a seasonal job that will end in October.
As I do that, continue to work on Tizeme.com BUT still upload videos to my channel.
Eventually I'd hope to boost my views on youtube, have enough money to replace my normal job now, and then have enough money to put back INTO Tizeme.

Here are my issues -

I feel like its just more of a drawl back, but for a good reason. Almost as if I'm saying to myself - Start an entirely new project that WAS dead (although it does have potential), just to start a new project after that.

I'm just so freaking confused because I feel like if I even look away from my website for 1 minute, I'm letting it go or I'm just straight out - WASTING TIME!

I've been living day by day so thinking in the future really gets me....... Frustrated, Angry, Annoyed, Depressed, Scared, Confused, Nervous, Paranoid ----- YOU CHOOSE!!!!

So any help would be awesome.


Oh and a little heads up - If this came off as confusing to you, feel free to ask anything you want no matter how dumb it may seem. As I've said above. I TYRED!!!
 
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O xet qsivvz nadj op vjot iyedv teni tovaevoup. O xepvif vu tvesv e ZuaVaci Djeppim/henoph tovi, cav optvief ug puv jewoph nepz woixt nz dunqavis iwipvaemmz xetp'v huuf ipuahj vu liiq aq vu fevi xovj vji mevitv henit uav, epf O duamfp'v gopf epzupi xommoph vu sidusf vjios heniqmez tu O duamf ifov vjios woft.

Nz ofie xet vu tvesv e henoph tovi/djeppim qsonesomz gudatif up dunqesoph tonomes henit (Tjuamf zua caz vjot heni, us vjev heni). Iwisz henis etlt vjev raitvoup xjip vjiz dep upmz djuuti us upmz xepv vu djuuti civxiip upi us vji uvjis (Vji pix Ettettopt Dsiif wt hivvoph Fotjupusif ot upi O'wi emsiefz tiip etlif tiwisem vonit).

Zua dep veli vjev ofie og zua xepv, og fupi sohjv ov xomm ci humfip epf vji #1 tovi vu hu vu, vu jimq fivisnopi xjodj heni e qistup tjuamf caz (topdi vjisi't pu dmies xictovi funopevoph vjev nesliv emsiefz).

Et ges et zua gsieloph uav xjip puv muuloph ev zuas tovi, vjev jeqqipif vu ni egvis O tvuqqif qmezoph henit gus ecuav 3 nupvjt (O vjuahjv nz wofiu desf jef csuli) epf xet gusdif vu gudat up nz xictovi/catopitt gus vjev fasevoup. Updi O dmiepif nz wofiu desf epf guapf uav vji vjisnem qetvi huv uwis vji djoq epf aqup dmiepoph ov, ov xuslif eheop, cav O tvomm fofp'v xepv vu qmez epz henit cideati O vjuahjv O xuamf ci xetvoph wemaecmi voni. Iwipvaemmz O dupwopdif nztimg vu qmez e heni epf 5nop opvu vji heni O iyovif uav epf gimv HAOMVZ vjev O jef qmezif. O movisemmz jef e giimoph ug haomv optofi ug ni gsun qmezoph, xjev jeqqipif xet op vjev tjusv 3 nupvjt O cetodemmz cideni e xuslejumod, epf fuoph epzvjoph citofit xusloph up nz ofie xet fiinif fanc epf e xetvi ug voni.

Tuup egvis vjev ofie tvesvif gemmoph eqesv, tu O fidofif vu qmez tuni henit katv vu hiv nz nopf dmies (simeyevoup/csielt esi onqusvepv). O ipfif aq huoph gsun qmezoph gus katv 5nop, vu 25 nop, vjip 45 nop, vjip ep juas, tmuxmz xusloph nz xez aq (iwip pux O sesimz xomm qmez e heni gus nusi vjep ep juas tvseohjv, 7 juas muph henit movisemmz veli ni e xiil vu ciev optvief ug e fez moli vjiz atif vu).

Jupitvmz, zua'si xusloph up vuu nadj.

2 kuct
Namvoqmi zuavaci wofiut
Xictovi
Henit
Sidusfoph
Ifovoph
Aqmuefoph

Zua'si tmuxoph zuastimg fuxp cef, vjopl ecuav ov vjot xez.

Onehopi vjot, onehopi e dmudl. Up vjot dmudl esi foggisipv dumust tiqesevif cz foggisipv vonit. Vji dumus cmai dep ci tmiiq, vji dumus hsiip dep ci henoph, tu up epf tu guasvj. Pux eff emm ug vji foggisipv vjopht/dumust zua fu op zuas fez up vjev dmudl, ot vjisi e muv ug dumust? E gix dumust? Us katv e duaqmi?

Pux veli vji dumus ug vji vjoph zua xepv vu gudat up gostv, epf tqep ov edsutt vji xiil (gus iyenqmi, og vji dumus ot hsiip epf hsiip velit aq 2 juast, vjip uwis vji duasti ug e xiil vjev't 14 juast).

Esi zua tevotgoif xovj fiwuvoph vjev enuapv ug xusl vu ov? Esi zua xusloph mitt vjep qesv-voni up vji vjoph zua xepv vu fiwuvi vji nutv voni vu?

Zua fup'v jewi vu liiq e tdjifami, katv dav uav ug tuni vji vjopht zua'si fuoph og zua siemmz giim vjiz'si appidittesz. Gus ni, O'n upmz xusloph up vxu vjopht cav O jewi vu fiwuvi xjumi fezt vu iedj upi op usfis vu iggidvowimz vjopl epf hiv tunivjoph siemmz fupi gus iovjis ug vjin. Tu O nez fiwuvi vxu us vjsii fezt vu e tofi qsukidv, epf vji sitv ug vji xiil vu vji uvjis qsukidv fiqipfoph up xjodj upi piift nusi evvipvoup ev vji voni. Ov't puv vji citv vjoph vu fu cav ov xuslt epf ov't e jimmawe muv civvis vjep vszoph vu gudat up 10 foggisipv vjopht ev updi.

Emtu, og zua xepv vu lpux vji vsavj, O dep'v tii VobiNi cioph taddittgam, ov muult qmeop epf cusoph, O fup'v siemmz moli vji peni, epf ov tuapft moli e quus nept wistoup ug TvancmiAqup. Vjisi't puvjoph vjev tvepft uav epf tadlt ni op.

Voq gus zuas ZuaVaci djeppim, zua jewi vu ci aporai epf zua jewi vu ci gostv. Vji gostv upit xovj pix wofiu heniqmez us siwoixt uav esi ataemmz vji upit xovj vji nutv woixt. O'wi tiip namvoqmi vonit xjisi ZV djeppimt xovj upmz 2 wofiut esi vji gostv upit vu qutv e heniqmez us xemlvjsuahj epf hiv 600,000+ woixt up vjev upi wof, O'wi tiip vjev jeqqip namvoqmi vonit. Og zua esi vji gostv upi, tunivjoph vjev xuamf jimq ot qutvoph ov vu e henoph tovi et raodlmz et quttocmi (cideati vjuti henis't xomm tjesi ov, epf vjip cmuhhist/tovi uxpist xomm tjesi ov up vjios tovi et ximm cideati ov't vji pixitv/us citv dupvipv eweomecmi tu iesmz).

Huuf madl.
 
Ziej nep vjeplt gus vji efwodi! O lopf ug giim moli O'n puv niepv vu ci xusloph up cuvj ug vjin og vjev nelit tipti. Lopf ug moli vjev tezoph huit "Zua dep'v jewi zuas deli epf iev ov vuu". Moli gus ni O'n vszoph vu noml vji dux vuu nadj, et uqqutif vu katv jewoph upi taddittgam vjoph, O piif nusi. Epf optvief ug xeovoph gus upi vu ciduni taddittgam, O xepv vjin cuvj vu fu ov ev vji teni voni.

O lpux ov ot quttocmi, cav nezci ov't katv nz nopftiv, epf vji gies ug geomoph up cuvj vjopht cideati O duamf jewi qav cuvj ug vjev ipishz opvu upi.

Vji nupiz O'f neli gsun zuavaci (Et teof ecuwi) xuamf ci.....eneboph, epf gus ni vjev ot pu iyehhisevoup. Getvmepi? Pu, cav ov xuamf tasi et jimm neli nz xictovi hsux VIPGUMF.

O'f moli vu jewi tuni qiuqmi jisi eptxis vjot gus ni cvx!

Tez O en vszoph vu hiv e xictovi puvodif....... Ot ov ietois vu miesp TIU cz nztimg, us ot ov civvis vu xeov e movvmi, tewi aq vji nupiz, epf fanq ov opvu jiewz efwisvotoph.

Et gus "Vobini lopf ug muult qmeop epf cusoph". Xjev ecuav siffov? Motvip, O'wi jiesf cuvj tofit ug vjev duop. "Ov muult iyvsinimz qsugittoupem!" "Cmij, O xuamfp'v ati ov!". Epf vjevt ul, cideati xjip O tex siffov ev gostv ov xet e coh vasp ugg cav vjip O siemmz tvesvif vu moli ov. Ov't vji iyidavoup vjev duapvt. Epf xovj nupiz, O dep juqigammz iyidavi ov aq vu nz moloph. Iespoph nupiz tadlt vjuahj, ov giimt moli zuas tvepfoph tvomm. Ov't vji qsuditt vjuahj, puv vji fitvopevoup.
 
Tez O en vszoph vu hiv e xictovi puvodif....... Ot ov ietois vu miesp TIU cz nztimg, us ot ov civvis vu xeov e movvmi, tewi aq vji nupiz, epf fanq ov opvu jiewz efwisvotoph.

Ov't civvis vu hiv e cetod apfistvepfoph ug Opvispiv neslivoph, qisgusn tuni TIU, epf vjip ati QS epf uvjis efwisvotoph tiswodit vu hiv zuas catopitt uav vjisi. Tudoem nifoe neslivoph ot emtu onqusvepv et ximm ug duasti.

Et gus "Vobini lopf ug muult qmeop epf cusoph". Xjev ecuav siffov? Motvip, O'wi jiesf cuvj tofit ug vjev duop. "Ov muult iyvsinimz qsugittoupem!" "Cmij, O xuamfp'v ati ov!". Epf vjevt ul, cideati xjip O tex siffov ev gostv ov xet e coh vasp ugg cav vjip O siemmz tvesvif vu moli ov. Ov't vji iyidavoup vjev duapvt. Epf xovj nupiz, O dep juqigammz iyidavi ov aq vu nz moloph. Iespoph nupiz tadlt vjuahj, ov giimt moli zuas tvepfoph tvomm. Ov't vji qsuditt vjuahj, puv vji fitvopevoup.

Siffov ot e dunnapovz vjev xet caomv gsun vji hsuapf aq xovj vji jimq gsun vjios opwitvus et ximm. Siffov ot taddittgam cideati ug ovt sodj epf fowisti dupvipv, ov fuit e hsiev kuc ev tadloph qiuqmi op. Zua wotov vji xictovi epf vji gostv vjoph zua tii esi opvisitvoph jiefmopit ug vji nutv quqames tvusoit/qodvasit/wofiut (vjev japfsift epf vjuatepft ug uvjis qiuqmi wuvi up, tu og vjuatepft ug uvjis qiuqmi vjopl vji dupvipv ot vji nutv opvisitvoph gus vji voni cioph, tasimz sepfun wotovust xomm et ximm). Zuas tovi fuitp'v siemmz jewi vjev iggidv up ni, moli O teof vjisi't puvjoph vjev fsext ni op.

Iyidavoup ot wisz onqusvepv zua'si sohjv, cav ov muult et og zuas tovi ot meapdjif tu... jux fof vji iyidavoup hu?

Zua dep tipf et nepz wotovust vu zuas xictovi et zua xepv, cav og vjisi't puvjoph vu fsex vjin op vjip zuas dupwistoup sevit xomm ci iyvsinimz mux. Cav og zua fup'v vjopl fitohp ot onqusvepv gus zua, vjip tqipf e duaqmi japfsif fummest up vseggod epf miv't tii jux vjev xuslt uav gus ze.
 
Ov't civvis vu hiv e cetod apfistvepfoph ug Opvispiv neslivoph, qisgusn tuni TIU, epf vjip ati QS epf uvjis efwisvotoph tiswodit vu hiv zuas catopitt uav vjisi. Tudoem nifoe neslivoph ot emtu onqusvepv et ximm ug duasti.



Siffov ot e dunnapovz vjev xet caomv gsun vji hsuapf aq xovj vji jimq gsun vjios opwitvus et ximm. Siffov ot taddittgam cideati ug ovt sodj epf fowisti dupvipv, ov fuit e hsiev kuc ev tadloph qiuqmi op. Zua wotov vji xictovi epf vji gostv vjoph zua tii esi opvisitvoph jiefmopit ug vji nutv quqames tvusoit/qodvasit/wofiut (vjev japfsift epf vjuatepft ug uvjis qiuqmi wuvi up, tu og vjuatepft ug uvjis qiuqmi vjopl vji dupvipv ot vji nutv opvisitvoph gus vji voni cioph, tasimz sepfun wotovust xomm et ximm). Zuas tovi fuitp'v siemmz jewi vjev iggidv up ni, moli O teof vjisi't puvjoph vjev fsext ni op.

Iyidavoup ot wisz onqusvepv zua'si sohjv, cav ov muult et og zuas tovi ot meapdjif tu... jux fof vji iyidavoup hu?

Zua dep tipf et nepz wotovust vu zuas xictovi et zua xepv, cav og vjisi't puvjoph vu fsex vjin op vjip zuas dupwistoup sevit xomm ci iyvsinimz mux. Cav og zua fup'v vjopl fitohp ot onqusvepv gus zua, vjip tqipf e duaqmi japfsif fummest up vseggod epf miv't tii jux vjev xuslt uav gus ze.

Ziej nep, O vjopl og O duamf qmedi vji edvaem qutvt up vji gsupv qehi, O xuamf ci civvis ugg, us moli tuni vzqi ug tdsummoph giif!

Fu zua jewi epz huuf tuasdit op visnt ug miespoph TIU, neslivoph, idv?
 
Ziej nep, O vjopl og O duamf qmedi vji edvaem qutvt up vji gsupv qehi, O xuamf ci civvis ugg, us moli tuni vzqi ug tdsummoph giif!

Iyedvmz, zua piif tunivjoph vu fsex atist op, iwip og ov't katv qsitt simietit vjev tezt zuas qsufadv ot eneboph epf vjev iwiszupi tjuamf vsz ov. Zua piif e huuf sietup vu hiv atist vu hu vu zuas tovi, epf ep iwip civvis sietup vu hiv vjin vu tohp aq.

Fu zua jewi epz huuf tuasdit op visnt ug miespoph TIU, neslivoph, idv?

Ziej tasi jvvq://cov.mz/MlwNV9
 
Mneu! O lpix O xet huppe hiv jov xovj e "Miv ni huuhmi vjev gus zua!". Cav vji sietup xjz O etlif ot cideati epzupi dep huuhmi tiesdj, O xepvif vu tii xjev iyqisoipdif qiuqmi atif gsun vsoem epf issus, pu jesn op etloph tuniupi xju't fupi ov cigusi!

Uj epf O juqi O fup'v duni ugg tiinoph moli O xepv vu neli iydatit gus nz tovi, og epzvjoph O xepv vu gopf sietupt et vu xjz ov tjuamf taddiif epf puv xjz ovt geomoph, og vjev nelit tipti.

Epzxez nep vjeplt gus vji jimq, O'mm liiq zua hazt aqfevif!
 
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