Hello everyone, I hope y'all are doing well.
Before I start writing something about myself, I would like to give a heartfelt thanks to everyone here.
I joined the forum a while ago and have had the opportunity to read through many fantastic posts. The value that is presented in this forum is incredible. I didn't think I would ever find anything like this and be offered the chance to take part in it. Please know that you have given me courage and support with your stories and experiences.
I'm working hard to return this offered value, even if I can't speak from experience yet. At least from the perspective of an entrepreneur.
___
Okay, but who am I now anyway?
Until recently, I would probably have answered with something like: my name is Jin, I'm 25 years old, from Germany, and an almost graduated student of ecotrophology.
While these facts have not changed, my perception of my identity has evolved thanks to countless insights during my recent life. One example is @Antifragile with this thread GOLD! - ASSERTION - MINDSET - Tell us, who are you?, who reminded me of something almost forgotten. (thank you!)
As a child, I always got what I wanted. I'm an only child and grew up in good circumstances. Big house, a playground garden, loving grandparents, caring parents, pets.
You could see that reflected in my personality. Although children often act without thinking, I was very ego-focused. After all, I was the center of attention in my family, so naturally, I had to be the center of attention for everyone else, right?
Fancy private elementary school - bullying victim. No friends, bad grades, but a lot of degradation and insults. My self-esteem? Not a shred left. Then I changed schools. Friends for the first time, suddenly better grades. Nevertheless, I was fat, socially disturbed, and unhappy.
That's how it went until I graduated from 10th grade. No bullying incidents, but a burning family drama in the background. My mother often cried because of my father.
Eventually, she found a new man and wanted to move out. But I didn't want that. The mere thought was devastating. I couldn't imagine being without my grandparents, leaving the safe space of my childhood.
However, if you have to choose between mom and dad, who will it be?
For me, it was always my mom.
New city, new school, and a man who "took away" my mother from my younger self. I hated him.
The new school was just as awful. A grammar school in which everyone shared a deep connection, knowing each other for eons. I wasn't a part of that, being the new girl. At last, I managed to make two friends.
These friends quickly became my pillars to which I clung desperately. I didn't know the rules of healthy friendship. My grades plummeted again, but this time badly.
My old school was known for its vulgar background and low teaching standards. My new one was famous for its high ideals and conditions.
Due to constant stress and my pronounced selfishness, my only two friendships broke up. It all dragged me down into a temporary depression.
I was done with the world and dropped out of school four months before graduation. Of course, everyone was disappointed in me. My self-hatred was at its peak.
With no school cornering me against a wall, I had a lot of time to think.
Something flipped inside my mind and drove me to turn everything upside down.
Change of diet, sport: 15 kilos lost. Savings, driving licence: autonomy.
My relationship with my stepfather improved. My mom was always by my side, loved me unconditionally, and supported me in everything I did. Even her new marriage wouldn't change that. I had just been too blind and ignorant to realize that. I was happy to form more of a grown-up relationship with her as well, one where I could prove how grateful I was to have her.
Self-confidence and social awareness finally grew with my age. Soon, I would even be the first in my family to go to university.
And just as the fog was finally clearing in the valley, we were surprised by an unexpected force of nature. The most violent storm I had experienced.
My mom was diagnosed with brain cancer. My biggest nightmare grew into reality in one fell swoop. I was still a teen lost in life, I needed my mother more than everything.
For the next two years, we went to war for a battle that carried no happy end. Our living room transformed into a hospital room. My stepfather and I became carers until the bitter end. Each day, every day. There was no room for silly dreams of the future. We commuted to hospitals, went through dozens of doctors' consultations, and organized the death of someone who wasn't supposed to die.
I held her hand when she stopped breathing. With her, my most important life support disappeared. It was the biggest shit I've ever experienced.
Ironically, it was her death that revealed to me what kind of person my mom was. In Germany, we have this saying: "You only realize that something is valuable when it's no longer there."
She was a person that others subconsciously liked to gather around. She was a best friend to many, and a valuable part of life for even more. No words in the world can come close to doing justice to what I see in her. She became the idol I respected most.
At the same time, I could see everything more clearly now. I understood what was important in life. Or so I thought.
I had time to think about myself again. What do I want to do with my life? Forgotten dreams slowly started their comeback, lurking around in the edges of my mind.
As promised, I was the first in my family to go to university. Nutritional science promised a lot of well-paid jobs and the change in diet I accomplished boosted my interest. Anxiety often tried to stop me, but I went anyway, moved into my first apartment, and vowed to pull this off to prove to everyone and myself that I could do it.
And I was good at it, very good in fact.
I became one of the best students in my year, popular with many fellow students and professors alike, and a member of the student council. I grew a strong network of renowned names in my industry, got offered to publish my bachelor thesis, and received invitations to respectable congresses where even more golden opportunities seemed to only wait for me to grab them.
But something felt wrong.
My one very good friend, who is two years younger than me, told me about freedom. Of course, I knew what freedom was and had my idea of it, but hers differed greatly. While I talked about being able to choose a promising career with my good degree, she talked about happiness.
That was my first push to start thinking out of the box.
We talked often and for hours and hours and hours when she visited me. Her vision of her path to happiness was more vivid every time. But this path was not at all compatible with our social rules. It couldn't possibly work.
But it did.
Right now, she lives on her property with a forest, her own house, and absolute freedom. And she is 23 years old.
I wouldn't be here now without her.
I had changed a lot since my mom died. No words can phrase how I felt but this time made me into someone I have learned to love. I've found lifelong friends and filled the gap that my mother's death left in my family. I started focusing on the well-being of those around me. I read about Gabor Maté, Marshall Rosenberg, and many other inspiring people, reinforcing my out-of-the-box vision.
I came free from my video game addiction and forged my life alone. I grew independent and felt better than ever before in life.
Finally, by absolute coincidence, MJ's Millionaire Fastlane fell into my hands. I have never read a financial book before. I don't know what whim made me buy the book anyway, but I devoured the contents in a few days.
For many, this is the beginning of a journey towards their freedom.
For me, it is confirmation, mentor, and teacher. It symbolizes my goals and reminds me to keep pushing my boundaries. It shows me the plan I've been looking for for so long.
I don't yet know what the dense forest I'll walk through will look like inside, but I know that as long as I follow the path I'll get there. The monsters I have to face along the way? I hope they don't come alone.
I want to make my mom proud. I want to move something in this world. I'm done being just an observer watching shit burn down around me while some "experts" tell me not to sweat it with a shrug. I'm fighting against inequality, poverty, and environmental destruction at once. I'll be reaching as many people as possible to turn their lives into something worth living for.
There are so numerous individuals to whom I owe the fact that I am who I am now. I want to give them something back that goes beyond a thank you.
That's me. That's what I'm going to do.
Thanks, mom, for everything you did for me. I will continue to grow, never stop learning, and always go full out. I'm going to turn the tides around for our family. I'm going to crack all obstacles anyone might throw in my path.
Thanks for being my mom. Only you even enabled me to take a chance in this life. I'm going to make it worthwhile.
___
Finally, to everyone who's still reading this, thank you. We're nothing more than strangers, yet we met on this path through the forest. I'm going to assist in every way I can.
And, of course, thank you @MJ DeMarco for doing what you do. Thanks for writing these fantastic books, thanks for building this community. I greatly respect you and wish you all the best in life. Continue being as amazing, you matter a lot.
Cheers!
Before I start writing something about myself, I would like to give a heartfelt thanks to everyone here.
I joined the forum a while ago and have had the opportunity to read through many fantastic posts. The value that is presented in this forum is incredible. I didn't think I would ever find anything like this and be offered the chance to take part in it. Please know that you have given me courage and support with your stories and experiences.
I'm working hard to return this offered value, even if I can't speak from experience yet. At least from the perspective of an entrepreneur.
___
Okay, but who am I now anyway?
Until recently, I would probably have answered with something like: my name is Jin, I'm 25 years old, from Germany, and an almost graduated student of ecotrophology.
While these facts have not changed, my perception of my identity has evolved thanks to countless insights during my recent life. One example is @Antifragile with this thread GOLD! - ASSERTION - MINDSET - Tell us, who are you?, who reminded me of something almost forgotten. (thank you!)
As a child, I always got what I wanted. I'm an only child and grew up in good circumstances. Big house, a playground garden, loving grandparents, caring parents, pets.
You could see that reflected in my personality. Although children often act without thinking, I was very ego-focused. After all, I was the center of attention in my family, so naturally, I had to be the center of attention for everyone else, right?
Fancy private elementary school - bullying victim. No friends, bad grades, but a lot of degradation and insults. My self-esteem? Not a shred left. Then I changed schools. Friends for the first time, suddenly better grades. Nevertheless, I was fat, socially disturbed, and unhappy.
That's how it went until I graduated from 10th grade. No bullying incidents, but a burning family drama in the background. My mother often cried because of my father.
Eventually, she found a new man and wanted to move out. But I didn't want that. The mere thought was devastating. I couldn't imagine being without my grandparents, leaving the safe space of my childhood.
However, if you have to choose between mom and dad, who will it be?
For me, it was always my mom.
New city, new school, and a man who "took away" my mother from my younger self. I hated him.
The new school was just as awful. A grammar school in which everyone shared a deep connection, knowing each other for eons. I wasn't a part of that, being the new girl. At last, I managed to make two friends.
These friends quickly became my pillars to which I clung desperately. I didn't know the rules of healthy friendship. My grades plummeted again, but this time badly.
My old school was known for its vulgar background and low teaching standards. My new one was famous for its high ideals and conditions.
Due to constant stress and my pronounced selfishness, my only two friendships broke up. It all dragged me down into a temporary depression.
I was done with the world and dropped out of school four months before graduation. Of course, everyone was disappointed in me. My self-hatred was at its peak.
With no school cornering me against a wall, I had a lot of time to think.
Something flipped inside my mind and drove me to turn everything upside down.
Change of diet, sport: 15 kilos lost. Savings, driving licence: autonomy.
My relationship with my stepfather improved. My mom was always by my side, loved me unconditionally, and supported me in everything I did. Even her new marriage wouldn't change that. I had just been too blind and ignorant to realize that. I was happy to form more of a grown-up relationship with her as well, one where I could prove how grateful I was to have her.
Self-confidence and social awareness finally grew with my age. Soon, I would even be the first in my family to go to university.
And just as the fog was finally clearing in the valley, we were surprised by an unexpected force of nature. The most violent storm I had experienced.
My mom was diagnosed with brain cancer. My biggest nightmare grew into reality in one fell swoop. I was still a teen lost in life, I needed my mother more than everything.
For the next two years, we went to war for a battle that carried no happy end. Our living room transformed into a hospital room. My stepfather and I became carers until the bitter end. Each day, every day. There was no room for silly dreams of the future. We commuted to hospitals, went through dozens of doctors' consultations, and organized the death of someone who wasn't supposed to die.
I held her hand when she stopped breathing. With her, my most important life support disappeared. It was the biggest shit I've ever experienced.
Ironically, it was her death that revealed to me what kind of person my mom was. In Germany, we have this saying: "You only realize that something is valuable when it's no longer there."
She was a person that others subconsciously liked to gather around. She was a best friend to many, and a valuable part of life for even more. No words in the world can come close to doing justice to what I see in her. She became the idol I respected most.
At the same time, I could see everything more clearly now. I understood what was important in life. Or so I thought.
I had time to think about myself again. What do I want to do with my life? Forgotten dreams slowly started their comeback, lurking around in the edges of my mind.
As promised, I was the first in my family to go to university. Nutritional science promised a lot of well-paid jobs and the change in diet I accomplished boosted my interest. Anxiety often tried to stop me, but I went anyway, moved into my first apartment, and vowed to pull this off to prove to everyone and myself that I could do it.
And I was good at it, very good in fact.
I became one of the best students in my year, popular with many fellow students and professors alike, and a member of the student council. I grew a strong network of renowned names in my industry, got offered to publish my bachelor thesis, and received invitations to respectable congresses where even more golden opportunities seemed to only wait for me to grab them.
But something felt wrong.
My one very good friend, who is two years younger than me, told me about freedom. Of course, I knew what freedom was and had my idea of it, but hers differed greatly. While I talked about being able to choose a promising career with my good degree, she talked about happiness.
That was my first push to start thinking out of the box.
We talked often and for hours and hours and hours when she visited me. Her vision of her path to happiness was more vivid every time. But this path was not at all compatible with our social rules. It couldn't possibly work.
But it did.
Right now, she lives on her property with a forest, her own house, and absolute freedom. And she is 23 years old.
I wouldn't be here now without her.
I had changed a lot since my mom died. No words can phrase how I felt but this time made me into someone I have learned to love. I've found lifelong friends and filled the gap that my mother's death left in my family. I started focusing on the well-being of those around me. I read about Gabor Maté, Marshall Rosenberg, and many other inspiring people, reinforcing my out-of-the-box vision.
I came free from my video game addiction and forged my life alone. I grew independent and felt better than ever before in life.
Finally, by absolute coincidence, MJ's Millionaire Fastlane fell into my hands. I have never read a financial book before. I don't know what whim made me buy the book anyway, but I devoured the contents in a few days.
For many, this is the beginning of a journey towards their freedom.
For me, it is confirmation, mentor, and teacher. It symbolizes my goals and reminds me to keep pushing my boundaries. It shows me the plan I've been looking for for so long.
I don't yet know what the dense forest I'll walk through will look like inside, but I know that as long as I follow the path I'll get there. The monsters I have to face along the way? I hope they don't come alone.
I want to make my mom proud. I want to move something in this world. I'm done being just an observer watching shit burn down around me while some "experts" tell me not to sweat it with a shrug. I'm fighting against inequality, poverty, and environmental destruction at once. I'll be reaching as many people as possible to turn their lives into something worth living for.
There are so numerous individuals to whom I owe the fact that I am who I am now. I want to give them something back that goes beyond a thank you.
That's me. That's what I'm going to do.
Thanks, mom, for everything you did for me. I will continue to grow, never stop learning, and always go full out. I'm going to turn the tides around for our family. I'm going to crack all obstacles anyone might throw in my path.
Thanks for being my mom. Only you even enabled me to take a chance in this life. I'm going to make it worthwhile.
___
Finally, to everyone who's still reading this, thank you. We're nothing more than strangers, yet we met on this path through the forest. I'm going to assist in every way I can.
And, of course, thank you @MJ DeMarco for doing what you do. Thanks for writing these fantastic books, thanks for building this community. I greatly respect you and wish you all the best in life. Continue being as amazing, you matter a lot.
Cheers!
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