The abundance is slowly killing my drive

[hellolin]

I just graduated from college, had a 3 month medical vacation(Back surgery) in China, during which I stayed with my father's family, and I just came back to the states last week.

During my 3 month stay in China, all I can do was reading books and think about my future ventures, I read the TFM, really opened my eyes and thoughts, then processed to read a lot more. During my college time, I had an internship at a company which the CEO shared his reading list, and from that list I was able to get a lot good books to read, including books such as "Zero to one", "The hard things about hard things", then a lot more books from people on this forum. I was motivated even though I had to stay on bed to rest my back from the surgery for most of the time, I found out I really enjoyed to read, and from reading books written for a certain purpose, I can surely gain a lot of insights and eventually get ahead in life.

There was also the issue of scarcity, as many of you might know, China is still in the developmental stage of a third world economy, during my 3 month stay, I saw how my family in China was living (Or surviving), life is a lot different, not just because it is a different culture, but because my family had to really plan everything out, and mostly, trying hard to maintain a good personal relationship with everyone around my family, as many Chinese here will tell you, without "Guan Xi"(Personal relationship management), your life will go nowhere in China. The roads and infrastructure was also years behind compare to the US, there are way too many people sharing way too few resources (Relative to the US). The internet in China is not that useful as well, as it is a semi-state controlled media carrier, it can not be used as a resource for free information as well as here in the US.

Last week I finally ended my vacation and here I am in the US, I am still amazed at the level of abundance my life has here. Everything was within my reach, for a relatively small cost to me, the roads, buildings and everything around me is nicely build and run, with no need for complex plannings to get things done. I have fast internet at home which grants me access to every free information/learning tools I need, however, I already starts to feel like I have too much choices at my hands, and the level of abundance is making me feel like I am living in a womb, compare to my life in China for the past 3 month. I used to think Los Angeles is too crowded and with too many cars on the road, but compare to China, LA probably has less than half of the density of cars and people which makes me feel like the streets are empty here. It's been less than a week since I got back and I already feel like I am starts to becoming lazy. It's not like my own life situation is set, I am still recovering from the surgery and living with my family here, and is likely need to find a way to make a living soon enough, however the level of abundance around me is already making me feel like my life is set, which is clearly not.

TL,DR: Lived in China with scarcity for 3 month, was motivated to read books and think, now that I came back to the states, lived in abundance for less than a week, and is already losing motivation. What should I do to keep my drive going?

 

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[Get Right]

That's cool. I'm glad you are enjoying what our fore-fathers built.

So what will you build for the next generation?

 

[Delmania]

Build strong habits.

Motivation is like a starter engine in a car, it gets the engine of change going, but it's not enough to sustain you. Humans inherently seek the path of least resistance. Rather than fighting your inclination to laziness, you want to use it. That's done by establishing habits. Set a specific and place for reading, and stick to it. At first you'll be fighting inertia, but after a while, your brain will automatically enter into that habit loop and you'll find yourself automatically walking to that place when it's time. If you have a book ready and waiting for you, you'll pretty much start reading it.

The same goes for thinking. Set a time and place for thinking (as distraction free as possible) and stick to it.

 

[Fendaril]

Have you considered that maybe you don't need more?

 

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[DeletedUser394]

Take 75% of your income and divert it to an account the sole purpose of which is to use to fund a business/real estate, etc.

Live on 25%. Boom, you're back into scarcity mode and need to force yourself to try something different if you want to eat.

On a less extreme vein, spend ONLY the money that is required for living. No 'wants' at all. All that 'want' money goes towards funding your business. If you want to have nice things, you need to create a business to get those things.

Or maybe you just to want it bad enough and are happy with your lot in life. No problems there.

 

[ToniLene]

Have you considered that maybe you don't need more?

Oh, nevermind.

 

[ToniLene]

That's cool. I'm glad you are enjoying what our fore-fathers built.

So what will you build for the next generation?

Who's "our?'

 

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[theag]

TL,DR: Lived in China with scarcity for 3 month, was motivated to read books and think, now that I came back to the states, lived in abundance for less than a week, and is already losing motivation. What should I do to keep my drive going?

How about you get off your a$$ and do something?

The alternative is living a life of mediocrity and leeching off others in the lower middle class. Personally this would make me want to kill myself asap.

But then again, not everybody is cut out for bigger things in life. Maybe just keep doing whatever you're doing all day.

Your life, your decision.

 

[DeletedUser394]

Why does everyone need to be an a**hole all of the time? It's about as old and stale as the memes have become.

This guy is recovering from back surgery... he just got back from a 3 month life changing trip that has changed his view on the world.

He has said nothing disparaging about anyone, and yet all he is met with is derision (for the most part).

OP I wish you the best.

 

[Fendaril]

How about you get off your a$$ and do something?

The alternative is living a life of mediocrity and leeching off others in the lower middle class. Personally this would make me want to kill myself asap.

But then again, not everybody is cut out for bigger things in life. Maybe just keep doing whatever you're doing all day.

Your life, your decision.

Why does everyone need to be an a**hole all of the time? It's about as old and stale as the memes have become.

This guy is recovering from back surgery... he just got back from a 3 month life changing trip that has changed his view on the world.

He has said nothing disparaging about anyone, and yet all he is met with is derision (for the most part).

OP I wish you the best.

GrumpyCat, it's because they are insecure and want to make him feel the same way.

You can usually tell who will remain on the fastlane and who is heading for financial and emotional ruin.

 

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[Get Right]

Who's "our?'

Uhhh, the world?

 

[IrishSpring600]

How about you get off your a$$ and do something?

The alternative is living a life of mediocrity and leeching off others in the lower middle class. Personally this would make me want to kill myself asap.

But then again, not everybody is cut out for bigger things in life. Maybe just keep doing whatever you're doing all day.

Your life, your decision.

This helps OP and gives him constructive advice on how to proceed.

Uh...rewind?

OP, be honest with yourself. You're motivated to write a long post and use the internet to communicate with others. Maybe you were meant to be a blogger. The motivation is clearly there.

 

[theag]

motivated

motivation

Nobody gives a F*ck about anybodys motivation.

 

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[theag]

This helps OP and gives him constructive advice on how to proceed.

Uh...rewind?

OP, be honest with yourself. You're motivated to write a long post and use the internet to communicate with others. Maybe you were meant to be a blogger. The motivation is clearly there.

OP, listen to his constructive advice and become a blogger. He clearly knows what he is talking about.

 

[Imgal]

TL,DR: Lived in China with scarcity for 3 month, was motivated to read books and think, now that I came back to the states, lived in abundance for less than a week, and is already losing motivation. What should I do to keep my drive going?

@hellolin - Glad to hear the recovery from your surgery is going well. I've mentioned it a few times in other posts so I apologise to others if I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but you need to reframe your thinking. Usually I'm telling people to focus on the positives and not on the negatives. Here I would tell you to not be so focused on the here and how and your frame of mind right now. When you were in China you were able to develop a different mindset... one that you felt worked better for you. You might forget your books or your favourite jumper when leaving a place, but the way you felt in China isn't something that got switched off when you worked through the gates and boarded the plane. You have decided to shift your mindset back to how you felt in the US before because that kind of thinking has become a habit for you. Just as you have the mental power to feel how you do about it now, you equally have the power not to.

You can have the same thoughts and drive you had in China. It's just a matter of believing that. Seriously. It's that simple.

 

[Fendaril]

OP, listen to his constructive advice and become a blogger. He clearly knows what he is talking about.

No, I think you don't know what you're talking about.

Not only that, you look dumber after each post, and I'm not the only one who thinks so.

 

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[sija1]

@Imgal Great post, as always.

@hellolin Wish you the best!

 

[Mattie]

TL,DR: Lived in China with scarcity for 3 month, was motivated to read books and think, now that I came back to the states, lived in abundance for less than a week, and is already losing motivation. What should I do to keep my drive going?

Perhaps you're focused on the wrong things. Whether you're in the middle of a flooding volcano or standing top of the most expensive castle in the world, your focus should be on goal to achieve. The goal may change over and over again, but the surroundings are irrelevant to keeping yourself focused.

If you're demotivated this must be you're swinging in the Low arousal zone. Fears about taking action and having to get back on your feet and face the real world after having surgery and being in recovery. You've been healing for a certain point in time. Now you are resisting the change that comes that you have to do something different.

If your goal is to make a certain amount of dollars. That means focusing right now what you can do. Is there a reason buildings and environment have something to do with taking action? No. It's scenery. It's escapism and an excuse. Internet doesn't sound like a bad thing. Most of us use it to find resources. We don't get overwhelmed by information. We search for what we need at the moment to take action in some part of the process. One book at a time, article, video. We're not thinking about how much money we have in my experience at least. I don't think about it at all. I do what's in my control. Get around the obstacles, and problem shoot. There's really no difference between you and us, healing or not, you have opportunity right there at your finger tips instead of focusing on all this other stuff.

Perhaps you need to divert your attention to the "NOW" and what you can create "NOW" and what you can be working on instead of talking about all the scenery that supposedly makes a difference. I wasn't in the best circumstances when I got here. I was more excited because I was in a better environment, had open reign to take control of my life, use the resources available online, and found fast lane to hold me accountable, to what I already had in my mind. What you're thinking about scarcity for at this point, I have no clue. The opportunities, resource, and environment is way better as you complain. I suggest you go listen to some motivational music and find a project to work on.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

No, I think you don't know what you're talking about.

Not only that, you look dumber after each post, and I'm not the only one who thinks so.

You've been here barely a week. Take a breather. Please post less and start reading more. If you can't take this advice, I can make it happen for you.

 

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[Fendaril]

You've been here barely a week. Take a breather. Please post less and start reading more. If you can't take this advice, I can make it happen for you.

Go ahead.

There are thousands of other places to go.

Thousands of other ways to become successful.

I won't care, and I will forget about this place and move on.

Adios.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Go ahead.

Done.

There are thousands of other places to go.

May I suggest Reddit.

 

[ZCP]

The OP asked for motivation.

If everyone provides it in a slightly different way, OP may be able to find the one way that helps him get it in gear. No nonsense, tough love works. So does talking through your feelings for enlightenment and pursuing your dream. Different for different people.

Repeat, the OP asked for motivation.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

@hellolin -- practice gratitude. Running water, a warm place to sleep (and shit) food on the table, and thankfulness that your back will get better.

the OP asked for motivation.

The OP needs to find a meaning and a purpose. If you he had a gun pointed in his direction, purpose nor motivation wouldn't be an issue. Comfort comfortably kills.

 

[Kingmaker]

TL,DR: Lived in China with scarcity for 3 month, was motivated to read books and think, now that I came back to the states, lived in abundance for less than a week, and is already losing motivation. What should I do to keep my drive going?

Start a business.

Right now your problem is being lazy, not abundance. Reading books and thinking isn't doing, so you were lazy even in "scarcity".

Get off your a$$ and provide value to someone, and once you have customers expecting you to deliver the value to them motivation is never an issue, you will just learn to get stuff done.

 

[Imgal]

@Mattie - that is an incredible post. Thank you. Recommended reading for anyone stuck in their own poured sandpit of quicksand.

 

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[Iwokeup]

I just graduated from college, had a 3 month medical vacation(Back surgery) in China, during which I stayed with my father's family, and I just came back to the states last week.

During my 3 month stay in China, all I can do was reading books and think about my future ventures, I read the TFM, really opened my eyes and thoughts, then processed to read a lot more. During my college time, I had an internship at a company which the CEO shared his reading list, and from that list I was able to get a lot good books to read, including books such as "Zero to one", "The hard things about hard things", then a lot more books from people on this forum. I was motivated even though I had to stay on bed to rest my back from the surgery for most of the time, I found out I really enjoyed to read, and from reading books written for a certain purpose, I can surely gain a lot of insights and eventually get ahead in life.

There was also the issue of scarcity, as many of you might know, China is still in the developmental stage of a third world economy, during my 3 month stay, I saw how my family in China was living (Or surviving), life is a lot different, not just because it is a different culture, but because my family had to really plan everything out, and mostly, trying hard to maintain a good personal relationship with everyone around my family, as many Chinese here will tell you, without "Guan Xi"(Personal relationship management), your life will go nowhere in China. The roads and infrastructure was also years behind compare to the US, there are way too many people sharing way too few resources (Relative to the US). The internet in China is not that useful as well, as it is a semi-state controlled media carrier, it can not be used as a resource for free information as well as here in the US.

Last week I finally ended my vacation and here I am in the US, I am still amazed at the level of abundance my life has here. Everything was within my reach, for a relatively small cost to me, the roads, buildings and everything around me is nicely build and run, with no need for complex plannings to get things done. I have fast internet at home which grants me access to every free information/learning tools I need, however, I already starts to feel like I have too much choices at my hands, and the level of abundance is making me feel like I am living in a womb, compare to my life in China for the past 3 month. I used to think Los Angeles is too crowded and with too many cars on the road, but compare to China, LA probably has less than half of the density of cars and people which makes me feel like the streets are empty here. It's been less than a week since I got back and I already feel like I am starts to becoming lazy. It's not like my own life situation is set, I am still recovering from the surgery and living with my family here, and is likely need to find a way to make a living soon enough, however the level of abundance around me is already making me feel like my life is set, which is clearly not.

TL,DR: Lived in China with scarcity for 3 month, was motivated to read books and think, now that I came back to the states, lived in abundance for less than a week, and is already losing motivation. What should I do to keep my drive going?

Yo man,

I hear what you're saying. I lived in Japan for two years and learned to live a much simpler life, with a changed outlook, diet, fitness, and spirituality. It was wonderful. But when I came back to the States? Extremely difficult to maintain.

Abundance is its own drug. It's a powerful dream killer.

It's why diabetes is such an insidious disease: how bad can that extra donut really be? That Dr. Pepper? That pizza?

The problem is that over time that abundance of sugar overwhelms and 'burns out' the pancreas' ability to produce insulin (which helps to absorb sugars and turn it into energy and/or fat [=long term energy storage]) and it also makes the rest of the body less sensitive to insulin.This then leads to an overabundance of sugars in the body, which leads to the death of:

• The myocardium (heart muscles)
• Nerve endings (leading to very painful diabetic neuropathy)
• Poor vascular supply to the extremities, increasing the risk of gangrene (NSFW warning).
• Increases the risk of necrotizing fasciitis (have seen multiple cases. It's horrible. If you search, then you've been warned)
• early death
• blindness
• And so on....

The thing is, diabetes (the acquired kind) is a disease that's unique to societies with an overabundance (of cheap carbs).
.
.
.
.
.
So what does that have to do with you?

You've just come back from a situation where things were stripped down and so you had to focus on what was really important. But now that you're back, the clarity is getting muddled.

What can YOU do about it?

I have THREE suggestions that may provide you with the motivation that you need.

You probably won't like what I have to say, but then nothing in life that's worthwhile is ever easy. Business, providing value (in whatever way possible), relationships, being a good human being.

I'm a former Marine. And as Marines are wont to proclaim:

Becoming a Marine was one of the toughest things that I ever did. But something that has provided me with decades of Confidence, Pride, and the knowledge that I CAN achieve whatever I set my mind to.

This is the Fastlane. We're focused on doing things that obey to the best possible way MJ's CENTS criteria. None of it's easy.

Alright! Enough talk. Okay, are you ready?

• Put yourself in a situation where you're uncomfortable.

Take a chance! Leave the nest. Find a job outside of LA (LA's not how the rest of the world works, man. ). Maybe leave California altogether. Move cross country. Maybe move to Vietnam or Thailand and start from there. If possible, set yourself up with six months of bills and rent paid on an apartment. You've got a hard deadline to get something together. Get WAAAY out of your comfort zone. You're NEVER going to grow, learn, and truly test yourself until you have some adversity to go up against.​

• Take some serious time to get to know yourself. Are you truly committed to providing value/service to others? Yes? No? Don't be afraid of the answer! I've counseled people for decades now (sheesh) and if there's one piece of advice that always proves valuable, it's this

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.- Wm. Shakespeare, via Polonius, Hamlet, Act 1, Sc. 3

It's really that simple. You are unique - no one else has your unique combination of talent, experiences (able to live in China for three months with family? I'll never have that), beliefs, and mindset. No one. So what's really important to you? If you don't know right now, that's just fine.

Start finding out by doing things (just get out there!).

Some things you'll like, some you'll hate, and some you'll love. Who cares what it is? Just get going. The information gleaned from these "tryouts" can take as long as it needs to, and it's going to be incredibly important information to you. For the rest of your life.
​

• Last but not least, BELIEVE in YOURSELF.

Seriously. When the chips are down, winners don't quit. They go "Get get their weight."​

 

[jon.a]

Seriously. When the chips are down, quitters don't quit. They go "Get get their weight."​

Quitters don't quit?

 

[Iwokeup]

Quitters don't quit?

ah, editing. Thanks! Fixed..

 

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[Chazmania]

How about you get off your a$$ and do something?

That's about the best advice OP or anybody could receive if they're complaining that it's the country's fault they aren't taking action. Not trying to get on the OP's case or anything but just sayin - it's always about action.

 

[ddzc]

You need to get out of that beautiful L.A comfort zone you're in. My biggest change was getting uncomfortable and hustling 16-18 hours a day, moving away from home...forcing myself to do something which will make a huge impact in the future. Hope you recover well...change your zone and it will change your mentality and work ethics in the entrepreneurial world, I promise you.