Asking someone if they need help - how exactly?

[devine]

There is a legend few times a year, the Confusion Man takes the form of a forum user, and brings mass confusion to all the other users on the forum.
For a while, the Confusion Man took the form of a user called Lights, who remained for several years wrapping the minds of all who was in his path.
Now Confusion Man has come back once again, to fulfill their ultimate goal making sure no one understands anything.

Something about this thread, man.

Some interesting facts about our mammal cousins.

$HARKS can smell blood.

A LION$ roar can be heard from miles away.

Perhaps the mightiest (certainly most legendary, thanks to man kind's obsessive love-affair with predators in general)) predator ever T-Rex, had a roar that probably shot waves of fear through the hearts of herbivore within earshot.

It is fitting for a MON$TER to have a roar. The roar is almost of spiritual importance. After all, it communicates exactly what needs to be communicated - through the voice, right into the ear of the listener - and yet, no word is spoken; it's like he's speaking in tongues.

It is as though the roar is a Monster's defiant attempt to $PIT in the face of the gods (the gods of fate, who - had he not taken the red pill - would've succeeded in keeping him dumb and broke), for his roar is a declaration of mortal immortality. For while the monster very well may be a mere organism, a mere mammal ("only human), for a few decades, he wields the power of Thor. Like King Alexander, he psychotically believes himself the$ON of ZUE$.

Haha.

Throwin' lightening bolts at the largest buildings on the planet.

Thunder is my roar.

My instinct is to start making phone calls, sales calls, right at 9:00am. I remember making phone calls in a boiler room. A real life boiler room, making call after call, setting office records for the amount of time I spent on the phone. I went so hard, grinding from 7am to 7pm. If I had the brilliant idea to hit Hawaii at night, I would've done that back then, too.

If I knew about dialers, I would've used em'. But I did it the old school way.

See, the point of all this is that I got a bunch of responses from the ad. The second real sales people hear my voice, they hear the growl of a MON$TAR.

My message to them is simple: I tell them where the fresh meat is. I tell them where the blood is. I show them where to take their fangs and claws - their ability to close, close, close all the time and always be closing no matter the **** what - and I let them loose on an unsuspecting, virgin, fresh industry.

This is the result of tens of thousands of hours hustling hard on the phone, as an investment banker (man, did Ari Gold help back then!), as an energy broker, all the way up to what I am now.

A Monster.

And I can smell fake from light years away.

HAHAHAHAHA!

It's not Monday's that suck, bitch. I F*ckin' LOVE Mondays. It's Saturday's I hate. That's when no one picks up the phone.

Lazy bastards. How do you expect to change the world when you take 28% of the week off?

If you were a superhero, would you let the villain take two-sevenths of your superpowers?

If you were the villain, wouldn't you WANT to take a whopping 28% percent of your foes superpowers?

Lol. That alone is enough to tip the scales in the war.

 

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[Bounce Back]

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[IrishSpring600]

Jiz puvjoph vu eff katv xepvif vu tez qsuqt up zua gus etloph gus efwodi, veloph vji efwodi ug [HASHTAG]#Muphopat[/HASHTAG] vu hu vu Vuetvnetvist, fuoph ov epf siqusvoph cedl.

Vjeplt, JupizCefhis!

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[Niptuck MD]

Tu O'wi teof jo vu e muv ug qiuqmi op vji qetv fez epf O lpux ov nez us nez puv gomm e piif ug civvisoph vjios fez. Jupitvmz, O katv xepv vu tqsief qutovowovz.

Jux iyedvmz fu O gopf uav og tuniupi piift jimq epf og O'n ecmi vu jimq vjin? O jewi bisu gsoipft cav O jewi pu qsucmin eqqsuedjoph e tvsephis...O katv piif e tdsoqv.

zua tjuamf vsz siqushsennoph zuas tacduptdouat cz motvipoph vu wesouat zuavaci wofiut epf motvip vu iesm pohjviphemi us csoep vsedz.

 

[Niptuck MD]

Jiz puvjoph vu eff katv xepvif vu tez qsuqt up zua gus etloph gus efwodi, veloph vji efwodi ug [HASHTAG]#Muphopat[/HASHTAG] vu hu vu Vuetvnetvist, fuoph ov epf siqusvoph cedl.

o tidupf vjev. o en e nincis ug vuetvnetvist epf ov jet ciip e hsiev iyqisoipdi puv upmz op niivoph qiuqmi cav op niivoph JOHJ OR aqciev epf qutovowi ipishivod opfowofaemt. Emtu zua nez xepv vu hiv ugg ug gedicuul gus exjomi vu fivuy cideati gedicuul ot e wotaem fsah. vjisi ot e muv ug C.T epf pihevowovz up gedicuul