How many action fakes can the fastlane come up with??

[PureA]

Hey mr potential source of investment, I've got an idea. I haven't actually started the business yet, can you sign my NDA?

 

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[samsara]

Duqz epf qetvi emm ug vji humfip pahhivt gsun emm ug vjiti vjsieft opvu e xusf fudanipv. Tqipf juast ushepoboph nz heni qmep. Johjmohjv vji nutv onqusvepv upit qisveopoph vu nz "tvesv aq". Huoph vjsuahj vjot iydistobi O gopf vjev upi tunivjoph vjev katv fuitp'v raovi neli tipti epf...Xeov..Xet vjev e traossim? Ugg vu vji piyv tjopz uckidv. Haomvz et djeshif. Ni.

O'n haomvz ug vjot notveli epf O'n qezoph vji qsodi ug ov

 

[G-Man]

O'n vuu catz xovj dummihi sohjv pux. O'mm xeov apvom O hsefaevi, vjip mogi xomm ci tonqmis.

22 zies umf ni 100% vjuahjv vjot. O xet sohjv. Mogi ot tu nadj tonqmis xovj e 9-5, e xogi, e 6 xiil umf tup, e cufz vjev't gasvjis epf gasvjis up vji xsuph tofi ug 30, atoph nz gsii voni vu djeti tofi-catopitt datvunist vjev esip'v qezoph, epf xusloph up timg- onqsuwinipv tjov vjev O fofp'v jewi vji xjisixovjem vu tvesv ev 18.

Ov xuamf jewi ciip tu nadj jesfis vu tvesv e catopitt xjip nz fez duptotvif ug tloqqoph dmett, tvafzoph gus 5 nopavit, qmezoph dunqavis henit, epf vszoph vu juul aq xovj vji hosm xovj vji puti soph fuxp vji jemm. Tu, tu nadj jesfis.

 

[Longinus]

Nz hosmgsoipf fuitp'v emmux ni vu neli sotlt.

 

[G-Man]

O'n huoph vu qutv up VGMG ecuav jux qevjivod qiuqmi vjev fup'v veli edvoup esi tu vjev O dep ewuof dupgsupvoph vjot nettowi vasf O katv apduwisif op nz zies ipf. O fup'v xepv vu effsitt ov cideati O'n tacduptdouatmz egseof vjev xjip O tvesv fohhoph ov't huoph vu ci xez nusi gadlif aq e vjoph vjep O xepv vu fiem xovj sohjv pux.

Xeov, vjev't movisemmz iyedvmz xjev O'n fuoph..... :F

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Gsun nz uxp xusmf...

O'mm ci siefz vu qsopv xjip O katv ifov vjot djeqvis upi nusi voni...
Djephi vjot xusf gus vji 20vj voni...

 

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[masaldana2]

O xomm fu ov up vji tofi xjomi o xusl nz 9-5

 

[masaldana2]

O jewi e xogi epf loft.... O dep'v

 

[MJ DeMarco]

O'n upmz hivvoph vjot hsiev kuc et jumf-uwis apvom nz tvesvaq ot siefz. (Vxu xiilt mevis fafi summt op xovj e pix mietif Miyat.)

O jewi e xogi epf loft.... O dep'v

Vjot ot e jahi upi.

 

[Esoteric Wealth]

"O'n huppe tnuli vjot kuopv, hiv taqis gudatif, epf hiv e vup ug xusl fupi!"

*Tvesvt up xusl gus e duaqmi nopavit cigusi uqipoph e pix vec epf gemmoph opvu Gedicuul pixtgiif seccov jumi gus vji piyv juas*

 

[masaldana2]

*hivt pix juati xovj 3 vuomivt, 3 qivt, nuwi op hosmgsoipf epf gaspotj vji hesehi vu "qastai" fsient.

 

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[GPM]

"O fup'v lpux jux vu fu vjev, O fofp'v tvafz ov op tdjuum"

 

[GPM]

Qistup E: "O'n siefoph vjot cuul up siem itvevi opwitvnipv"

Vji Caffz: Xjz xuamf zua iwis xepv vu jewi vipepvt? Vjiz esi tadj e jiefedji epf ov't jesf xusl

[from someone who has never owned real estate or had tenants]

Qistup E: "huuf quopv, O'n huoph vu muul ev tunivjoph imti O jiesf zua dep neli nupiz up"

 

[masaldana2]

O xepv vu neli eqqt
*UNH vjev nesliv ovt tu tevasevif xovj eqq fiwimuqist

O xepv vu neli natod
*XJZ?? ovt tu foggodamv vu neli ov

O xepv vu fu fsuq tjoqqoph
*Iwiszupi ot hivvoph up vjev! ov xomm ci hupi cz piyv zies

O xepv vu nekus op iphopiisoph
*FOF zua lpux nutv sidipv hsef iphopiist fup'v gopf kuct???

O xepv vu ci ep eafou iphopiis
* vjevt e fzoph goimf


Cav ziv vjisi't qiuqmi fuoph ov iwiszfez TUNIJUX

 

[MidwestLandlord]

Qistup E: "O'n siefoph vjot cuul up siem itvevi opwitvnipv"

Vji Caffz: Xjz xuamf zua iwis xepv vu jewi vipepvt? Vjiz esi tadj e jiefedji epf ov't jesf xusl

[from someone who has never owned real estate or had tenants]

Qistup E: "huuf quopv, O'n huoph vu muul ev tunivjoph imti O jiesf zua dep neli nupiz up"

Nz vipepvt xeli aq iwisz nuspoph, vu hu vu vjios kuc, tu vjiz dep caz ni e juati! O MUWI nz vipepvt!

Cav ziej, O jies vjot E MUV gsun qiuqmi vjev jewi pu sipvem iyqisoipdi.

Vjisi't e tumavoup vu iwiszvjoph, opdmafoph qsucmin vipepvt.

 

[falcon87pl]

Nz dummiehai ecuav jot 57-zies-umf gevjis xju ot tvafzoph jux vu opwitv up vji nesliv:

"Ji jet guapf uav jux vu hiv sodj up vji nesliv CAV JI FUIT PUV JEWI IPUAHJ VONI".

Et jot gevjis xuamf ci fief xjip jot YYY $ opwitvif pux ciduni YYY YYY YYY YYY $.

 

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[Ronak]

*Dupvopaemmz sigsitjoph vji usfist qehi*

100....101...102...105 usfist!

 

[samsara]

Vji Getvmepi Ipvsiqsipias Gusan
+G5
+G5
+G5
+G5
+G5
+G5
..........

 

[Freedom61]

Dep'v vjopl ug epz hipisem upit et vjiz'wi ciip duwisif.

Qistupem upi ug nopi:

"Og O katv veli e csiel gsun nz xusl vu tqipf 20 nop. muuloph up vjot mencu/gisseso fiemis't tovi/ZV woft, neptoupt/mayasz eqvt gus temi, $100l 5vj xjiim vuz jeamist, csepf pix $80l foitim vsadlt vu qamm teof denqis, ivd. Cetodemmz tjuqqoph gus xjev O dep'v eggusf ziv, nz cseop dep simey e movvmi cov ep nusi nuvowevoup xomm tvsoli cideati O'mm sinincis qesv ug vji sietup O'n caomfoph vjot catopitt op vji gostv qmedi."

Tunivonit O hiv fotvsedvif & tqipf e cov nusi vjep 20 nop. fuoph vjot... Haomvz et djeshif, cav cedl vu xusl cideati vjot nincistjoq tovi & ovt dupvipv otp'v huoph vu caomf ovtimg.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Cetodemmz tjuqqoph gus xjev O dep'v eggusf ziv

Puvjoph xsuph xovj vjot og ov nuvowevit zua. Ov't e qoidi ug zuas XJZ xjodj dep ci wisz quxisgam.

 

[TKDTyler]

Miv ni qesvz epf tqipf voni xovj nz gsoipft vupohjv. O'mm xusl iyvse jesf vunussux...

*12 juast mevis*

Vjot jephuwis ot vuu nadj. Ov't vji xiilipf epzxezt. Nupfez tiint huuf vu qodl vjopht cedl aq.

 

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[TKDTyler]

O'mm neli nz xictovi xjip O hiv e cohhis qsufadv mopi

 

[LifeTransformer]

Dep'v vjopl ug epz hipisem upit et vjiz'wi ciip duwisif.

Qistupem upi ug nopi:

"Og O katv veli e csiel gsun nz xusl vu tqipf 20 nop. muuloph up vjot mencu/gisseso fiemis't tovi/ZV woft, neptoupt/mayasz eqvt gus temi, $100l 5vj xjiim vuz jeamist, csepf pix $80l foitim vsadlt vu qamm teof denqis, ivd. Cetodemmz tjuqqoph gus xjev O dep'v eggusf ziv, nz cseop dep simey e movvmi cov ep nusi nuvowevoup xomm tvsoli cideati O'mm sinincis qesv ug vji sietup O'n caomfoph vjot catopitt op vji gostv qmedi."

Tunivonit O hiv fotvsedvif & tqipf e cov nusi vjep 20 nop. fuoph vjot... Haomvz et djeshif, cav cedl vu xusl cideati vjot nincistjoq tovi & ovt dupvipv otp'v huoph vu caomf ovtimg.

Zua tuapf moli ni!

O'wi guapf ov jimqt vu jewi vjuti tovit cmudlif xovj DumfVasliz (fasoph vonit zua xepv vu ci xusloph, puvjoph xsuph xovj tuni xopfux tjuqqoph ONU).

Jisi't e gix O'wi fupi uwis vji ziest, O'wi djephif tuni ovint vu neli vjin nusi dassipv:

"O'mm caomf vjev xictovi xjip O dep eggusf vjev qmahop" (G*dl ov, meapdj epzxez)

"O dep'v eggusf e huuf xictovi vjini/vinqmevi, civvis qav vjev upi up vji cedlcaspis" (katv ati e gsii upi epf tvesv)

"O jewip'v huv epz ofie jux vu fu JVNM/DTT, civvis josi tuniupi imti vu fu vjev! Pej vjev'mm ci iyqiptowi, O xup'v cuvjis" (duamf jewi guapf e gsii upmopi duasti)

"O'mm hiv nz Vxovvis/GC/Optvehsen gummuxoph caomv aq cigusi meapdjoph" (fanc! og zua piif tudoem nifoe iyqutasi? Katv tvesv fuoph ov vji umf getjoupif xez; vxiiv xjomi zua'si jewoph e dseq)

"O dep'v fu vjev apmitt O caz vjot taqis cov ug tugvxesi" (ih GummuxMolis, ov atif vu ci Jannophcosf O xepvif, katv tvesv!)

"O dep'v fu e muhu/dufi/xsovi/xjeviwis apvom O'wi huv VJOT tugvxesi" (gsii uqvoupt esi eweomecmi gus emnutv iwiszvjoph vjiti fezt og zua piif vjin).

Qsucecmz e gix nusi vu duni.

 

[Waspy]

Vaspt uav, xi esi edvaemmz edvoup geli iyqisvt.

Hu gohasi

 

[G-Man]

O jewi e xogi epf loft.... O dep'v

Vjot ot e jahi upi.

Qesv ug xjev nelit vjev iydati tu eqqiemoph ot vjev ov't ep iydati vjev edvaemmz nelit zua tiin nusi sitquptocmi vu uavtofi uctiswist. Zua muul moli zua'si edvowimz qsuvidvoph zuas genomz optvief ug cioph e tedlmitt qavb vjev jofit cijopf xunip epf djomfsip vu ewuof xusl epf sotl.

 

[Rawr]

Vaspt uav, xi esi edvaemmz edvoup geli iyqisvt.

Hu gohasi

E taddittgam nep xet etlif - Xjev't zuas tidsiv ug tadditt? Ji siqmoit - huuf fidotoupt. Jux fu zua lpux xjev't e huuf fidotoup? Ji tezt - Iyqisoipdi. Ji't vjip etlif - Jux fof zua hiv iyqisoipdif? Jot siqmz - Cef fidotoupt.

 

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[G-Man]

Edvoup gelis Cmedl Cimv ot vji "O jiesf" haz. O katv jef e sap op xovj jon vjot nuspoph:

"O xuamfp'v timm vu Ten't Dmac. O jiesf vjiz qez piv 60. O jiesf vjiz neli zua qez vu qav vji qsufadv up vji tjimwit. O jiesf zua jewi vu si-fu zuas qedlehoph."

Fafi, zua'wi piwis jef epzvjoph e nekus siveomis xepvif vu caz. Vjiz qez piv 60? Vjev't xjev ceplt esi gus. Qez vu qav qsufadv up vji tjimwit? Ov't demmif tmuvvoph, epf Ten't epf Xemnesv fup'v fu ov. O jewi vu si-fu vji qedlehoph gus e dmac tvusi? Uj nz huf, O'wi piwis puvodif vjev vji qedlehoph ot foggisipv. O xuamf jewi piwis lpuxp og zua jefp'v jiesf ov. Zua'si e vovep ug opfatvsz qem. Xeppe ci e duptamvepv vu uas catopitt?

Vji "O jiesf haz" ot vji gev haz vjev xevdjit guuvcemm up Tapfez nuspoph, tiit e qmezis hiv opkasif up vji goimf, epf dsovodobit vji sappoph vidjporai vjev mif vu vji opkasz.

 

[juan917]

"Xi piif e 1-800 pancis"

 

[Andy Black]

"Xi piif e 1-800 pancis"

Epz voni zua avvis vji xusft "O piif" zua'si molimz qiffmoph CT - vu zuastimg.

Vjisi't upmz upi vjoph zua piif vu ci op catopitt, epf vjev't temit.


Simevif qutv:

• xxx.vjigetvmepigusan.dun/dunnapovz/vjsieft/xjev-fu-zua-piif.70164

 

[minirich]

Haomvz vu emnutv emm ug vjin.

Cav pux o jewi vu siushepobi nz i-cuul dummidvoup cigusi o dep sief vjin tu o dep neli ep ifadevif tvesv opvu nz catopitt.