Hey fastlane forum. Just need to get something off my chest, you might think I’m bitch in regards to this post. But I need some perspective or some new light on my life.
I’m 18 have a corporate job in the slow lane and another job on the side, I have various F*ck this moments that enable me to change my ways for a couple weeks then I succumb to myself. Due to external factors that I give in to things that disrupt my “flow” I guess you can say or I’m just being a bitch or coward who knows. Such as watching family’s soccer game etc.
Throughout my own self discovery reading various books, especially MJ’s. I have been aware of the rate race or the “red pill” for a couple of years. Seeing that unfold within my work life, personal life and just self awareness when I look around it is like everybody’s existence is just copy and pasted, copy and pasted. The people look at there phones like robots, it doesn’t feel I have purpose or anything I just simply exist. I had a goal which motivated me as reason to get this slow lane job (i would learn more about my industry and get paid to do it) so I thought that was a plus. But it simply isn’t it anymore.
It takes me a hour and a bit to get work and come back home, I make use of my time by reading books and gaining “knowledge”. When I came across MJs books which I read numerous times, I happen to always feel that reading books are just action faking. I’ve always desired freedom that entrepreneurship seems to provide, I guess you can say I’m a “wantrepenuer”. MJ states that the passion doesn’t exist (doing what you love) in which u agree but the journey that is the process doesn’t seem any better. It just feels like an empty circle jerk like the freelancing, copywriting and dropshipping crazes on twitter where they jack each other off for hours on end. Commenting on each others posts and all the other crap.
I have just feel like life has sedated me. I wish I had some sort of urgency to get off my a$$ and not have a choice but to do something. I’m well off tbh and I’ve kept note to always take the opportunities I’m given because I have the privilege of being able to fail and then to get right up again. Since how I’ve landed a corporate job at a young age while everyone else is studying or becoming tradie/apprentice and just filling the gap in there souls with consumerism and lots of alcohol on weekends.
I just don’t feel present in life anymore. I would even be willing to fight someone to the death just so I could fully experience life and how the moments of my life and existence lay in my very hands. If I have been defeated I would happily pass away as life has decided that for me.
I don’t know if you will find me psychotic, it’s just a monotonous cycle and circle jerk going around and around. The work that I do, it has no meaning or value to me. I try and think of problems that occur to me so I can be of use and attempt to resolve them but nothing comes to mind. I’m not looking for something revolutionary such as bill gates or mark zucker berg as I know the money is made in the tiny skews, such as the tracksuit pants that I wear and they have zipper pockets.
It feels like I have to develop a hard skill to create a business or I’m just procrastinating who truly knows anymore tbh. I know that the feeling of pride and passion will come with the work that is being done. But I just happen to feel that I have no purpose for my existence any more. Or I’m experiencing a “existential crisis”, I didn’t know they happened every week. If someone older could impart some wisdom that would be much appreciated.
My life besides my two jobs, gym, and travel to work leaves me a round 6-7 hours of sleep. I’m willing to work further but I have nothing to drive too, so I just get some sleep instead of cutting it out.
I could go on about this for ages but anyways I could have become a big bitch. But I would appreciate any guidance or advice. I doubt the grammar in this whole rant is even correct as I’m typing frantically on my iPhone, I apologise in advance.
Cheers Lachlan
I’m 18 have a corporate job in the slow lane and another job on the side, I have various F*ck this moments that enable me to change my ways for a couple weeks then I succumb to myself. Due to external factors that I give in to things that disrupt my “flow” I guess you can say or I’m just being a bitch or coward who knows. Such as watching family’s soccer game etc.
Throughout my own self discovery reading various books, especially MJ’s. I have been aware of the rate race or the “red pill” for a couple of years. Seeing that unfold within my work life, personal life and just self awareness when I look around it is like everybody’s existence is just copy and pasted, copy and pasted. The people look at there phones like robots, it doesn’t feel I have purpose or anything I just simply exist. I had a goal which motivated me as reason to get this slow lane job (i would learn more about my industry and get paid to do it) so I thought that was a plus. But it simply isn’t it anymore.
It takes me a hour and a bit to get work and come back home, I make use of my time by reading books and gaining “knowledge”. When I came across MJs books which I read numerous times, I happen to always feel that reading books are just action faking. I’ve always desired freedom that entrepreneurship seems to provide, I guess you can say I’m a “wantrepenuer”. MJ states that the passion doesn’t exist (doing what you love) in which u agree but the journey that is the process doesn’t seem any better. It just feels like an empty circle jerk like the freelancing, copywriting and dropshipping crazes on twitter where they jack each other off for hours on end. Commenting on each others posts and all the other crap.
I have just feel like life has sedated me. I wish I had some sort of urgency to get off my a$$ and not have a choice but to do something. I’m well off tbh and I’ve kept note to always take the opportunities I’m given because I have the privilege of being able to fail and then to get right up again. Since how I’ve landed a corporate job at a young age while everyone else is studying or becoming tradie/apprentice and just filling the gap in there souls with consumerism and lots of alcohol on weekends.
I just don’t feel present in life anymore. I would even be willing to fight someone to the death just so I could fully experience life and how the moments of my life and existence lay in my very hands. If I have been defeated I would happily pass away as life has decided that for me.
I don’t know if you will find me psychotic, it’s just a monotonous cycle and circle jerk going around and around. The work that I do, it has no meaning or value to me. I try and think of problems that occur to me so I can be of use and attempt to resolve them but nothing comes to mind. I’m not looking for something revolutionary such as bill gates or mark zucker berg as I know the money is made in the tiny skews, such as the tracksuit pants that I wear and they have zipper pockets.
It feels like I have to develop a hard skill to create a business or I’m just procrastinating who truly knows anymore tbh. I know that the feeling of pride and passion will come with the work that is being done. But I just happen to feel that I have no purpose for my existence any more. Or I’m experiencing a “existential crisis”, I didn’t know they happened every week. If someone older could impart some wisdom that would be much appreciated.
My life besides my two jobs, gym, and travel to work leaves me a round 6-7 hours of sleep. I’m willing to work further but I have nothing to drive too, so I just get some sleep instead of cutting it out.
I could go on about this for ages but anyways I could have become a big bitch. But I would appreciate any guidance or advice. I doubt the grammar in this whole rant is even correct as I’m typing frantically on my iPhone, I apologise in advance.
Cheers Lachlan
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