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Hi all,
In advance, know that this is a long post, but if you're interested in giving me feedback on my current approach/plan, please jump down to the bottom. But if you're interested in reading my journey in personal development and life that has led me to this decision, here, of the self-made/entrepreneurial route, continue straight on...
I'm 32 years old, currently live in Las Vegas, and have for a while "dabbled" in thoughts of entrepreneurship and "the fastlane life" but am really now getting to "this really is the road I must commit to." I've gone on a handful of life journeys so far, and this one is just the one I need to conquer now.
My background is that I went to college (hadn't a clue that this was a choice before, I just thought "Yeah you're supposed to go to college -- slowlane mentality"), I got a degree in computer science, but actually for reasons I didn't understand at the time, I had ambitions of getting a PhD in artificial intelligence. During my junior and senior years, I realized that my reasoning was misguided (unconscious false assumptions I had about the path I was wanting to go on), and started to feel lost. I considered joining the military, since I was fat, and thought "I think I'm smart enough, but the physical world is a challenge for me." I had this vision that bootcamp in the marines would be amazing. But when my mom cried at this thought, I didn't go.
I ended up losing a bunch of weight (I used to weigh 250 lbs), had an emotional experience that made me see I need to lose it, and I found the right book (when the student is ready, the teacher appears) to help me drop a lot of the weight. I still had later phases in this journey of health/fitness/weight loss, but that's my first journey.
Then, I started getting job offers from companies like Google and Microsoft, and saw that (for a just out of college kid), that earning 80k a year was very seductive. I knew nothing about business. I do remember in my first job, though, always wondering "My team doesn't make the company money. It is an investment in a future technology that may or not actually work. My manager sucks but he's managing an important project with 10 software engineers salary under him. How does the financials of this really work?" I thought about how I spent money and how my money came in as a paycheck. I was pretty bad at managing my money at this time, but I was wondering "How does my company make money and how do they decide how to spend it, especially on teams like ours?" I was working at Amazon.com, by the way, in a team that eventually built some technology for AWS. Amazon really is, as Bezos says, investing in things that may or may not pan out, 10 years later. Today, I realize "Oh, I was curious about accounting and cashflow and finances." I was a future entrepreneur, but I didn't really know it. Because I was, working on a previous journey.
I also realized "I need to learn how to meet girls" and started taking a lot of action in that area, as well as using my income to fund that other goal of mine, more or less. I started doing online dating, went to bars a lot, found some unusual mentors -- I don't recall where I met him, but I strongly remember going to bars a bunch, with this black guy, who seemed to be a compulsive liar (he borrowed $20 from me 5-6 times before I realized "Hmm, he always forgets to pay me back? Unlikely..."), was sharp looking, you could tell he worked out, so I thought he would be a good wingman. In a way, he was. He always said "I have to go pee. But why don't you go talk to those girls, I'll join in when I'm back from the bathroom." So that was actually good, he was throwing me in because he couldn't handle the first part, and in retrospect, I realize that was super good for me, doing the hard thing.
I was definitely on a hero's journey. I spent a few months doing this shit, and eventually on another night, I got really pissed off at a different "mentor" and left the bar he was at. That night, I found a girl who eventually became my first girlfriend. Eventually, I realized she was kinda emotionally f*cked up (more than me haha), and I'm glad my parents told me not to marry her (she was 28 and I was 22). I was really upset by this at the time, but then I found the book "The Game" on Amazon. This was my "second journey" in life. I never knew why girls didn't (appear to) like me, and I would soon get all of that handled.
So, then, I did the pickup artist thing for 5-6 years, slept with a lot of girls. At a certain point, I realized "I can sleep with a lot of girls, and I'm still not happy. F*ck." I started getting really depressed.
This was around age 28. I had gotten "good enough" with dating that I realized this wasn't the limiting factor in my happiness. I got fired from a job that I was trying to do well at. I guess I was emotionally not well-adjusted -- the main way I knew how to fix my mood was with sex and girls, and also things like giving people advice. Luckily, I never used drugs, though.
I had met a friend through the pickup artist world who did door to door sales, and he sold me (lol) on the awesomeness of that lifestyle. I thought it would be great, he said "as good as you are at pickup, you will definitely own this, easy, no problem."
I tried for a while, got 2 "almost sales" which actually I can say I'm proud of, given how "screwed up" I was in the head at that point. But those "almost sales" weren't enough for me to really make the decision to continue selling a product I didn't believe in (Vivint Home Security and Automation). I did see a lot of people who owned the product and how they felt trapped in a 67 month contract. So I eventually quit. (I don't think I'm as worried by that anymore, btw...sometimes people make bad decisions, but its not my job as a salesperson to tell them the bad part of my product, only the good parts. I don't necessarily consider that unethical...though I'm not going to go back to that work, either...)
I got another software job, but I had also randomly bought an audiobook that I thought was self-help, but it was really, more or less, about psychotherapy. I remember listening to that book, and at a certain point, hearing a statement the author, who to me was very trustworthy, say something that made me very angry. When he said it, I had this realization "This is why I have issues..." and kind of understood why I always thought I should go to a therapist, without really having a clear reason why. I was clear I needed that emotional help at this point, but quickly forgot.
I found a therapists website where I was living who listed that same book on his site, but thought "I feel fine" so I stopped thinking about it. I was uncertain whether I should go, so I didn't. One day, while on a break from work, my phone started buzzing, and I looked at it, and it said "Incoming call... Dad". I started tearing up quite a bit, and was very shocked at this. The memory of that is still very strong, and causes me to tear up as I write this now. At that moment, I decided "OK, I need to call that therapist guy." That really began the "third journey" of my life.
That also went in bursts and lulls, sometimes I thought "I don't need this" but I would have challenges that many didn't. I learned about a lot of stuff, depression, social anxiety, borderline personality disorder, and since at one point I moved (to where I currently live, Las Vegas, to be near some "fastlane friends" and try and start my own thing), I realized...that journey wasn't over. I still had some ups and downs, and tried some different therapists (BTW there aren't many great therapists in Las Vegas as in Seattle, as I soon learned).
Eventually I did some program called "The Landmark Forum" which really helped me out a ton. I believe that unblocked me enough to more or less "complete" what I referred to as my "third journey" (the whole therapy and internal emotional struggles).
In the past few months I have come to realize, I have a LOT of curiosities and a LOT of challenge focusing on one thing. I eventually realized that some sort of a decision needed to be made. I was unsure what path to take, and I was considering:
1. Keep being a software engineer (employee)
2. Change paths and become a therapist (I had so involved into this world that I actually really like it)
3. Change paths and get a PhD in biology/biochemistry/neuroscience (I also really get obsessively read books in any of those areas)
I started reading a book called "Decisive: How to Make Better Choices in Life and Work" by Chip and Dan Health and realized "Wow, I avoid making decisions." I knew I had to make a decision, and when I had those 3 options, one of the things these authors suggested is "Get more options. What if we took away all the options you are currently considering?"
I realized I was avoiding the entrepreneur option.
And eventually, I've come to realize, by looking a lot of my past, that this really is my next journey.
I've been reading a lot of the right stuff lately:
- The Millionaire Fastlane
- Robert Kiyosaki's "Rich Dad's Before You Quit Your Job: 10 Real-Life Lessons Every Entrepreneur Should Know About Building a Multimillion-Dollar Business" audiobook
- Decisive by Chip and Dan Health (not necessarily only for entrepreneurs but I guess we have to be good at making decisions!)
And, I believe my current plan is this:
1. Move back in with my parents, work on finding the right SAAS app to build -- I have an info product that my friend gave me his copy of that gives a guide of how to do this. I know it will be hard. I'm going to give myself a 6 month period of working on this path before I stop to reconsider "How is it going and do I need to change my direction to a different approach?" I guess what I mean is that even on the Millionaire Fastlane map, there will still be other roads to take, and I may need to change my road. So at this 6 month period, I will ask that question.
2. Also, during these 6 months, I will be doing some research on Sales Engineer and Software Sales jobs. Kiyosaki talks about how sales is really important for entrepreneurs, and so its possible that getting a Software Sales job in industry for 2-3 years (as Kiyosaki says, get a job only to learn, which would be the WHY of this sales job, before returning to building something). By the end of these 6 months I would have a clear idea of (1) if I pursue a software sales position, what industry do I want to sell in? (2) if I pursue a software sales position, what companies would I want to sell in? and also I would have done (3) spoken with some existing software sales people I've met through my social network or just cold emailing through LinkedIn in order to learn what they do and get an idea of that job market, so I can at least have somewhat of a network of people I know of if I go that route.
3. Keep reading the right books as an adjunct while taking action.
So basically:
1. find the right niche to build a SAAS product for
2. 6 months in, I may switch to a Software Sales position, based on what I've learned while doing (1) for 6 months
What's good is that:
1. My dad is on board with my plan (he had no real negative criticism, even though he tends to be critical of my plans and options)
2. My most "fastlane-minded friend" (he runs several businesses that are SAAS-based) thought both were good options, he was not 100% sold on "Software Sales is a necessity" but he said "The sales part of my work is the hardest, when my sales guy is out and I have to do sales calls, having read the sales books was really important, but it still shakes me up" (he is doing fairly good in business, so his endorsement gives me confidence). He said he more likes that in the SAAS option I would be going out and finding small business people's needs.
3. My expenses will be relatively low
My 2 biggest self-criticisms of this plan is:
1. Health insurance (not yet accounted for)
2. I will be living in Baton Rouge LA (another friend, who is more in the VC world, gave me general advice, "Get immersed in startups"). I don't know how good that area is in terms of meeting fellow entrepreneurs, compared to say, SF for a "startup minded" person or San Diego which appears to be big for entrepreneurs as well -- social support/network is useful I know, and my partial solution at least, to that is to immerse myself in a forum such as this one
Anyway, nice to meet you guys, thanks for those who have read the wall of text, and if you have any feedback on what I've stated so far. Peace!
--Tom
In advance, know that this is a long post, but if you're interested in giving me feedback on my current approach/plan, please jump down to the bottom. But if you're interested in reading my journey in personal development and life that has led me to this decision, here, of the self-made/entrepreneurial route, continue straight on...
I'm 32 years old, currently live in Las Vegas, and have for a while "dabbled" in thoughts of entrepreneurship and "the fastlane life" but am really now getting to "this really is the road I must commit to." I've gone on a handful of life journeys so far, and this one is just the one I need to conquer now.
My background is that I went to college (hadn't a clue that this was a choice before, I just thought "Yeah you're supposed to go to college -- slowlane mentality"), I got a degree in computer science, but actually for reasons I didn't understand at the time, I had ambitions of getting a PhD in artificial intelligence. During my junior and senior years, I realized that my reasoning was misguided (unconscious false assumptions I had about the path I was wanting to go on), and started to feel lost. I considered joining the military, since I was fat, and thought "I think I'm smart enough, but the physical world is a challenge for me." I had this vision that bootcamp in the marines would be amazing. But when my mom cried at this thought, I didn't go.
I ended up losing a bunch of weight (I used to weigh 250 lbs), had an emotional experience that made me see I need to lose it, and I found the right book (when the student is ready, the teacher appears) to help me drop a lot of the weight. I still had later phases in this journey of health/fitness/weight loss, but that's my first journey.
Then, I started getting job offers from companies like Google and Microsoft, and saw that (for a just out of college kid), that earning 80k a year was very seductive. I knew nothing about business. I do remember in my first job, though, always wondering "My team doesn't make the company money. It is an investment in a future technology that may or not actually work. My manager sucks but he's managing an important project with 10 software engineers salary under him. How does the financials of this really work?" I thought about how I spent money and how my money came in as a paycheck. I was pretty bad at managing my money at this time, but I was wondering "How does my company make money and how do they decide how to spend it, especially on teams like ours?" I was working at Amazon.com, by the way, in a team that eventually built some technology for AWS. Amazon really is, as Bezos says, investing in things that may or may not pan out, 10 years later. Today, I realize "Oh, I was curious about accounting and cashflow and finances." I was a future entrepreneur, but I didn't really know it. Because I was, working on a previous journey.
I also realized "I need to learn how to meet girls" and started taking a lot of action in that area, as well as using my income to fund that other goal of mine, more or less. I started doing online dating, went to bars a lot, found some unusual mentors -- I don't recall where I met him, but I strongly remember going to bars a bunch, with this black guy, who seemed to be a compulsive liar (he borrowed $20 from me 5-6 times before I realized "Hmm, he always forgets to pay me back? Unlikely..."), was sharp looking, you could tell he worked out, so I thought he would be a good wingman. In a way, he was. He always said "I have to go pee. But why don't you go talk to those girls, I'll join in when I'm back from the bathroom." So that was actually good, he was throwing me in because he couldn't handle the first part, and in retrospect, I realize that was super good for me, doing the hard thing.
I was definitely on a hero's journey. I spent a few months doing this shit, and eventually on another night, I got really pissed off at a different "mentor" and left the bar he was at. That night, I found a girl who eventually became my first girlfriend. Eventually, I realized she was kinda emotionally f*cked up (more than me haha), and I'm glad my parents told me not to marry her (she was 28 and I was 22). I was really upset by this at the time, but then I found the book "The Game" on Amazon. This was my "second journey" in life. I never knew why girls didn't (appear to) like me, and I would soon get all of that handled.
So, then, I did the pickup artist thing for 5-6 years, slept with a lot of girls. At a certain point, I realized "I can sleep with a lot of girls, and I'm still not happy. F*ck." I started getting really depressed.
This was around age 28. I had gotten "good enough" with dating that I realized this wasn't the limiting factor in my happiness. I got fired from a job that I was trying to do well at. I guess I was emotionally not well-adjusted -- the main way I knew how to fix my mood was with sex and girls, and also things like giving people advice. Luckily, I never used drugs, though.
I had met a friend through the pickup artist world who did door to door sales, and he sold me (lol) on the awesomeness of that lifestyle. I thought it would be great, he said "as good as you are at pickup, you will definitely own this, easy, no problem."
I tried for a while, got 2 "almost sales" which actually I can say I'm proud of, given how "screwed up" I was in the head at that point. But those "almost sales" weren't enough for me to really make the decision to continue selling a product I didn't believe in (Vivint Home Security and Automation). I did see a lot of people who owned the product and how they felt trapped in a 67 month contract. So I eventually quit. (I don't think I'm as worried by that anymore, btw...sometimes people make bad decisions, but its not my job as a salesperson to tell them the bad part of my product, only the good parts. I don't necessarily consider that unethical...though I'm not going to go back to that work, either...)
I got another software job, but I had also randomly bought an audiobook that I thought was self-help, but it was really, more or less, about psychotherapy. I remember listening to that book, and at a certain point, hearing a statement the author, who to me was very trustworthy, say something that made me very angry. When he said it, I had this realization "This is why I have issues..." and kind of understood why I always thought I should go to a therapist, without really having a clear reason why. I was clear I needed that emotional help at this point, but quickly forgot.
I found a therapists website where I was living who listed that same book on his site, but thought "I feel fine" so I stopped thinking about it. I was uncertain whether I should go, so I didn't. One day, while on a break from work, my phone started buzzing, and I looked at it, and it said "Incoming call... Dad". I started tearing up quite a bit, and was very shocked at this. The memory of that is still very strong, and causes me to tear up as I write this now. At that moment, I decided "OK, I need to call that therapist guy." That really began the "third journey" of my life.
That also went in bursts and lulls, sometimes I thought "I don't need this" but I would have challenges that many didn't. I learned about a lot of stuff, depression, social anxiety, borderline personality disorder, and since at one point I moved (to where I currently live, Las Vegas, to be near some "fastlane friends" and try and start my own thing), I realized...that journey wasn't over. I still had some ups and downs, and tried some different therapists (BTW there aren't many great therapists in Las Vegas as in Seattle, as I soon learned).
Eventually I did some program called "The Landmark Forum" which really helped me out a ton. I believe that unblocked me enough to more or less "complete" what I referred to as my "third journey" (the whole therapy and internal emotional struggles).
In the past few months I have come to realize, I have a LOT of curiosities and a LOT of challenge focusing on one thing. I eventually realized that some sort of a decision needed to be made. I was unsure what path to take, and I was considering:
1. Keep being a software engineer (employee)
2. Change paths and become a therapist (I had so involved into this world that I actually really like it)
3. Change paths and get a PhD in biology/biochemistry/neuroscience (I also really get obsessively read books in any of those areas)
I started reading a book called "Decisive: How to Make Better Choices in Life and Work" by Chip and Dan Health and realized "Wow, I avoid making decisions." I knew I had to make a decision, and when I had those 3 options, one of the things these authors suggested is "Get more options. What if we took away all the options you are currently considering?"
I realized I was avoiding the entrepreneur option.
And eventually, I've come to realize, by looking a lot of my past, that this really is my next journey.
I've been reading a lot of the right stuff lately:
- The Millionaire Fastlane
- Robert Kiyosaki's "Rich Dad's Before You Quit Your Job: 10 Real-Life Lessons Every Entrepreneur Should Know About Building a Multimillion-Dollar Business" audiobook
- Decisive by Chip and Dan Health (not necessarily only for entrepreneurs but I guess we have to be good at making decisions!)
And, I believe my current plan is this:
1. Move back in with my parents, work on finding the right SAAS app to build -- I have an info product that my friend gave me his copy of that gives a guide of how to do this. I know it will be hard. I'm going to give myself a 6 month period of working on this path before I stop to reconsider "How is it going and do I need to change my direction to a different approach?" I guess what I mean is that even on the Millionaire Fastlane map, there will still be other roads to take, and I may need to change my road. So at this 6 month period, I will ask that question.
2. Also, during these 6 months, I will be doing some research on Sales Engineer and Software Sales jobs. Kiyosaki talks about how sales is really important for entrepreneurs, and so its possible that getting a Software Sales job in industry for 2-3 years (as Kiyosaki says, get a job only to learn, which would be the WHY of this sales job, before returning to building something). By the end of these 6 months I would have a clear idea of (1) if I pursue a software sales position, what industry do I want to sell in? (2) if I pursue a software sales position, what companies would I want to sell in? and also I would have done (3) spoken with some existing software sales people I've met through my social network or just cold emailing through LinkedIn in order to learn what they do and get an idea of that job market, so I can at least have somewhat of a network of people I know of if I go that route.
3. Keep reading the right books as an adjunct while taking action.
So basically:
1. find the right niche to build a SAAS product for
2. 6 months in, I may switch to a Software Sales position, based on what I've learned while doing (1) for 6 months
What's good is that:
1. My dad is on board with my plan (he had no real negative criticism, even though he tends to be critical of my plans and options)
2. My most "fastlane-minded friend" (he runs several businesses that are SAAS-based) thought both were good options, he was not 100% sold on "Software Sales is a necessity" but he said "The sales part of my work is the hardest, when my sales guy is out and I have to do sales calls, having read the sales books was really important, but it still shakes me up" (he is doing fairly good in business, so his endorsement gives me confidence). He said he more likes that in the SAAS option I would be going out and finding small business people's needs.
3. My expenses will be relatively low
My 2 biggest self-criticisms of this plan is:
1. Health insurance (not yet accounted for)
2. I will be living in Baton Rouge LA (another friend, who is more in the VC world, gave me general advice, "Get immersed in startups"). I don't know how good that area is in terms of meeting fellow entrepreneurs, compared to say, SF for a "startup minded" person or San Diego which appears to be big for entrepreneurs as well -- social support/network is useful I know, and my partial solution at least, to that is to immerse myself in a forum such as this one
Anyway, nice to meet you guys, thanks for those who have read the wall of text, and if you have any feedback on what I've stated so far. Peace!
--Tom
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