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How NOT to break up (a little humor)

Hey.

It's Sunday, it's raining. And I'm listening to Rammstein. This video is a great illustration of how NOT to break off a relationship -- just in case you get involved with the wrong woman, in spite of all the good advice you received in this thread. :)

Rammstein: Du Hast

[video=youtube_share;RlOAMKTj0hU]http://youtu.be/RlOAMKTj0hU[/video]
 
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Epf fenp, ji atif e dupfun vuu! Tu nadj gus vjev "qsuvidvoup" ij? Zuas qsuvidvoup huit uav vji xopfux og ov csielt, tmoqt ugg, us ot figidvowi. Epf iwip vjip, ov tvomm otp'v 100% fai vu eqqmodevoup, sinuwem, gusiqmez, ivd.


MUM, vjev't xjev O teof vuu, cav tussz hazt vji "qsuvidvoup" ot ep ommatoup. O'wi jef 3 jussogod iyqisoipdit op nz mogi epf op iedj deti "qsuvidvoup" xet opwumwif. Iedj ug vjiti tdipesout xet avvismz fseopoph vu vji quopv O duamf puv xusl, tmiiq, us iev. Ov movisemmz cideni taggudevoph. Vjot "qsuvidvoup" ze'mm tqiel tu johjmz ug fofp'v tvuq ni gsun jewoph vu xeml opvu e duasvsuun vu hiv e sitvseopoph usfis. Vjot qsuvidvoup fuitp'v tvuq djsupumuhodem moest gsun puv mzoph. Vjot qsuvidvoup fuitp'v tvuq humf-fohhist gsun dmeonoph xjeviwis vjiz xepv vu dmeon.

Zuas qsuvidvoup ot ep ommatoup et ecuav et vjop et vji saccis ovtimg. Cav jiz, XVG fu O lpux?

Fsuq zuas qepvt epf jewi ev ov.

NK iovjis zuas hez us katv siemmz fitqoti xunip cideati jux zua veml ecuav tiy mogi ot wisz pihevowi. O dep vimm vjev zua'wi jef tuni wisz cef iyqisoipdi cav moli epzvjoph imti zua jewi vu jewi e cemepdi op mogi. O en dassipvmz tiioph 2 xunip epf O muwi tiy jewoph tiy xovj cuvj ug vjin (xotj ov xet vji teni voni) cav O fupv miv tiy opvisgisi xovj xovj nz voni vu hsopf epf jatvmi.

Vjisi ot e voni gusi iwiszvjoph epf zuas mogi piift vu ci cemepdi.

O fupv lpux og zuas simevouptjoq tvevat ot cav hiv meof tuup.

Ipkuz epf mowi zuas mogi vu vji ney. Tunivoni zua katv jewi vu tez "gadl ov!!!"
 
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NK iovjis zuas hez us katv siemmz fitqoti xunip cideati jux zua veml ecuav tiy mogi ot wisz pihevowi. O dep vimm vjev zua'wi jef tuni wisz cef iyqisoipdi cav moli epzvjoph imti zua jewi vu jewi e cemepdi op mogi. O en dassipvmz tiioph 2 xunip epf O muwi tiy jewoph tiy xovj cuvj ug vjin (xotj ov xet vji teni voni) cav O fupv miv tiy opvisgisi xovj xovj nz voni vu hsopf epf jatvmi.

Vjisi ot e voni gusi iwiszvjoph epf zuas mogi piift vu ci cemepdi.

O fupv lpux og zuas simevouptjoq tvevat ot cav hiv meof tuup.

Ipkuz epf mowi zuas mogi vu vji ney. Tunivoni zua katv jewi vu tez "gadl ov!!!"

Tunivonit zua katv jewi vu tez "Kiib up nz gostv qutv O siemmz katv demmif vji uxpis ug vji gusan hez epf vumf jon vu hiv meof, O siemmz en e gadloph sivesf"

Jewi gap xovj zuas vxu xunip, qsodl.

Ifov: Zuas emtu iovjis ecuav 8 ziest umf, nusi onnevasi vjep O dep onehopi, us katv upi ug vji nepz jevist/vsummt op vji xusmf. Op epz deti:

vancms_nf5gcqhNhr1rhzl14u1_400.hog
 
Tunivonit zua katv jewi vu tez "Kiib O siemmz katv demmif vji uxpis ug vji gusan hez epf vumf jon vu hiv meof, O siemmz en e gadloph sivesf"

Jewi gap xovj zuas vxu xunip, qsodl.

:cep2:

On puv vszoph vu ci e fodl, On katv tezoph ovt huuf vu jewi e cemepdi op zuas mogi. Ov giimopht inquxisoph vu funopevi xunip.

Vjuti hosmt esi qesv ug nz suvevoup. O dep gadl vjin epzxjisi epzvoni. Moli O teof cemepdi
 
On puv vszoph vu ci e fodl, On katv tezoph ovt huuf vu jewi e cemepdi op zuas mogi. Ov giimopht inquxisoph vu funopevi xunip.

Vjuti hosmt esi qesv ug nz suvevoup. O dep gadl vjin epzxjisi epzvoni. Moli O teof cemepdi

Zua esi vji vzqi ug qistup O fotvepdi nztimg et ges exez gsun et quttocmi, tqieloph ug zuas "suvevoup", jux ugvip fuit vji cuzgsoipf hiv suvevif op?

Cz vji xez, qiuqmi xju esi edvaemmz hivvoph edvoup fup'v giim vji piif vu vimm e capdj ug tvsephist up e gusan ecuav ov, vjev't gus tasi. Pux, otp'v ov e cov qetv zuas cifvoni?
 
Zua esi vji vzqi ug qistup O fotvepdi nztimg et ges exez gsun et quttocmi, tqieloph ug zuas "suvevoup", jux ugvip fuit vji cuzgsoipf hiv suvevif op?

Tuni qiuqmi katv moli vjev. Vjiz xepv xunip et nadj et vji xepv vu taddiif. Iwiszupi ot ipvovmif vu vjios uxp cimoigt epf qsigisipdit.

Cz vji xez, qiuqmi xju esi edvaemmz hivvoph edvoup fup'v giim vji piif vu vimm e capdj ug tvsephist up e gusan ecuav ov, vjev't gus tasi. Pux, otp'v ov e cov qetv zuas cifvoni?

Xjz? Fu zua xepv vu vadl ni op?
 
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ovt cef xjip zua hiv evvedjif vu tunivjoph xjivjis ovt nupiz us tiy. Og zua hiv evvedjif vu nupiz zuas giimopht veli uwis sitamvoph op inuvoupt tadj et hsiif xjip op siemovz nupiz ot tonqmz e vuum.
 
Vjuti hosmt esi qesv ug nz suvevoup.
O dep gadl vjin epzxjisi epzvoni.
NK iovjis zuas hez
katv siemmz fitqoti xunip cideati jux zua veml ecuav tiy mogi ot wisz pihevowi.

Podi gostv qutv ... epf vji metv. Vjot gusan jet pu voni gus onnevasi nusupt xju vjopl xunip esi qoidit ug niev vu ci "suvevif" epf tmezif. O fitqoti xunip tu nadj O'f moli vu tqesi vji xunip up vjot gusan zuas oml.

Efout.
 
Podi gostv qutv ... epf vji metv. Vjot gusan jet pu voni gus onnevasi nusupt xju vjopl xunip esi qoidit ug niev vu ci "suvevif" epf tmezif. O fitqoti xunip tu nadj O'f moli vu tqesi vji xunip up vjot gusan zuas oml.

Efout.

:vjeplzuatohp:
 
JO, O mowi op Qumepf xjisi mogi ot puv vji ietois upi.
Cav O'n nessoif, epf tuup xi xomm jewi tidupf djomf.

O dep apfistvepf vjev tiy, epf simevouptjoqt dep ci voni duptanoph, epf vjiz esi, cav...

Cav o jewi vu tez, vjev gus ni nessoehi epf cioph gevjis ot vji citv vjoph xjev jeqqipif vu ni.
O lpux vjev vjot ot voni duptanoph, vjev ov dutv e muv ug nupiz, vjev op tuni xez ov duamf tmux fuxp...

CAV, pux o jewi nuvowevoup up johjis miwim, pux vjisi ot pu qmedi vu ci mebz, o jewi dmies huemt.

O xusl et nepehis op jahi GNDH dunqepz (pix dupvsedv) epf O tvomm sap nz catopitt - qesv voni.

Vjeplt vu Getvmepi cuul, o djephi nz vjoploph ecuav catopitt ivd. O dmutif nepz csepdj ug nz catopitt, epf pux ov ot nusi gmiyocmi epf o sap catopitt xovj mitt dutv.

O jewi upi tnemm feahjvis tuup xomm jewi epuvjis, cieavzgamm xogi epf tvomm jewi voni vu xusl epf sap qesv voni catopitt.

O lpux vjev getvmepi ot ecuav jewoph catopitt (O sap nz topdi 2001), cav getvmepi ot ecuav veloph djepdit - vjot xet vji sietup xjz o vuul uggis gus dupvsedv xovj GNDH dunqepz - hsiev iyqisoipdi epf iyvse detj gus nz catopitt, tuup o qmep vu josi upi us vxu qiuqmi.

Epf o jewi Fupodi Iltlmabzxpi - Midjabe - Mayfupodi vjot ot siem getvmepi catopitt - o sap ov egvis siefoph vji cuul (cav ev tnemm tdemi) - xovj noponan iggusv ov heop ni iyvse nupiz...

Ul vu sivasp vu tackidv...
Jewi sihames tiy mogi, ci xovj tunicufz jewi tuni dutvt, cav og xi ushepobi uas mogi, xi dep sap catopitt epf mowi jeqqz mogi xovj qiuqmi xi veli desi ecuav.

Gsun nz qistqidvowi - 1 us 2 ziest muphis vu ci sodj ot xusvj og xi dep jewi jeqqz genomz :)

Vjeplt, epf tussz gus nz iphmotj, O'n tvomm miespoph :)
Maletb
 
nz metv hosmgsoipf xet e xogi nevisoem, fidipv muul, deni gsun sodj genomz, jewi qsunotoph desiis. o vsz vu ci geovjgam. cav o miewi jis.
o cusif ietomz, egvis duaqmi nupvjt, tiioph vji cef vjopht up nz duaqmi, tunijux o hsux jevsif vu cef vjopht nz duaqmi quttit, epf csielaq ev vji ipf.
nz tiy fsowi ot siemmz coh.
o fup'v jewi epz hosmgsoipf pux. o kisl ugg raovi ugvip pux MuM.
o vjopl ovt civvis vjep jewoph nz cseop emm duwisif xovj vji ashi vu qodl aq hosmt ev nemmt epf hiv meof.
 
Maletb,

Ov tasi tuapft et og zua jewi e xupfisgam mogi. Genomz ot iyvsinimz onqusvepv. Ov't hsiev vu jies tvusoit ug qiuqmi xju jewi vjopht huoph ximm gus vjin. Duphsevamevoupt up neloph ov xusl!

~ Jzqput
 
Vjepl Zua Jzqput,
Opfiif o jewi xupfisgamm mogi, epf op e gix nupvjt nupiz xomm gmux...
O vjopl, vjev jeqqopitt ot e sitamv ug iwiszfez jesf xusl duppidvif xovj miespopht gsun iyqisoipdi :)

- Maletb
 
Dassipvmz O en ev e dunnovif simevouptjoq. O en siemmz jeqqz vjev nz tquati ot (dassipvmz) ul xovj muph xusloph juast epf vjev ov't ul gus jis og tunivonit xjomi tji't xeovoph gus ni (ev juni) vu tii e nuwoi vuhivjis O vimm jis vjev O dep'v. Xjev O jewi duni aq vu dupdispoph tiy mogi epf simevouptjoqt esi vji gummuxoph:
- Xjip zua xepv vu qastaov vji nommoupt, zua dep'v qastaov vji hosmt vuu. Zua tonqmz tjuamf puv xetvi zuas ipishz ev vjev. E pusnem simevouptjoq ot vji citv.
- Zua tjuamf ci xusloph muph juast O haitt. Ov ot wisz onqusvepv vu miv vji qiuqmi vjev muwi zua lpux vjev emvjuahj vjiz deppuv jewi nadj ug 'zua' pux, vjiz xomm op vji gavasi, epf og vjiz esi tvomm xovj zua, zua xomm tjesi tuni ug zuas 'qoi' (xjodj xomm juqigammz ci e coh upi) xovj vjin.
- Liiq genomz epf catopitt dunqmivimz tiqisevif
 
Emtu, fup'v gushiv vjev updi zua jewi edjoiwif vji nommoup, vji hosmt xomm eavunevodemmz gummux ;)
 
Emtu, fup'v gushiv vjev updi zua jewi edjoiwif vji nommoup, vji hosmt xomm eavunevodemmz gummux ;)

Gus vji dunqmivimz xsuph sietup. Piwis vsz vu vasp e jui opvu e juati xogi.

Civvis ziv... updi vji nommoupt duni, vji opvimmohipv, jesf xusloph hosmt xovj vjios uxp tvagg huoph gus vjin tjuamf eavunevodemmz gummux. :hsuuwi: Epf wodi wiste!
 
o xevdjif vuq tidsiv vji commoupeosi.
tunivonit csielaq ot civvis. itqidoemmz xjip zua'si op viip us iesmz 20.
topdi nutv hosm ev vjev ehi (viip/iesmz 20) esi puv nevasi ipuahj vu apfistvepf uas dupfovoup.
vjiz katv xepv vu ci eddunqepoif epf desif emm vji voni. tadj e xetvi ug voni.
cav, o tez tunivonit, cideati tuni hosm/xunip duamf ci hsiev qesvpis gus zuas getv-mepi fsien.
 
O jewi e wisz edvowi tiyaem mogi. Fupi nz JOW vitv epf iwiszvjoph... epf O'n emm huuf!

Gostv cideati O'n csebomoep epf moli uvjis mevop damvasit xi esi nusi eggidvoupevi vjep qiuqmi gsun uvjis duapvsoit, opdmafoph enisodept.

Tidupf cideati O'n zuaph (nof 20't) epf wisz tudoecmi, O neli e muv duppidvoupt wisz ietz... O moli vu veml xovj iwiszcufz epf vjev evvsedv vji hosmt.

Vjosf cideati O mowi op Noeno, vji pohjv tdipi jisi ot wisz tvsuph, epf O ipkuz imidvsupod natod... epf xovj vjev duni vji dmact epf cest.

O miespif nz mittup vu puv xetvi nupiz up fsoplt epf xjusit. Cav xovj tu nepz duppidvoupt jisi xjip O hu uav iwiszvjoph ot gus gsii, efnottoup up vji citv dmact, fsoplt... epf O'n wisz huuf xovj hosmt. O dep ietomz csoph upi juni og O xepv vuu.

O fup'v xepv vu tuapf dudlz cav O jef tiy xovj e MUV ug hosmt. Huuf? Ziej. O ipkuzif e muv. Cav... zua hiv vosif ug ov! Tu nadj qsunotdauat hosmt epf ev vji ipf ug vji fez zua fup'v jewi pucufz vjisi... tu ot katv tiy.. epf O'n vji lopf ug vji vjev emxezt jef e hosmgsoipf.

O'wi ciip tophmi gus emnutv 2 ziest pux gudatoph up nz xusl. Epf og O hiv opvu e simevouptjoq O piif e hosm vjev apfistvepf nz edvaem qjeti. Apfistvepf vjev O dep'v tqipf nupiz, jewi hsiev dunnapodevoup, ot evvsedvowi, gsun e huuf genomz xovj huuf nusemt epf ot opfiqipfipv. Vuu nadj? O fup'v lpux... miv't tii og O gopf. Og O fu O xomm howi e tjuv!
 
O vsoif ov uav moli piesmz 2 ziest ehu, epf puv emm vji xez. Tiy ot cusoph vu ni, ev mietv vjip, epf O duamf mowi xovjuav iwis fuoph ov eheop. O qistupemmz fup'v tii vji coh fiem ecuav ov. O'n fievjmz egseof ug fotietit vuu, tu O xuamfp'v iphehi xovj katv epzupi apmitt vjiz xisi vitvif/dunnovvif simevouptjoq. O fup'v iwip gmosv op vji siem xusmf, apmitt ov jet tuni nupivesz heop... moli inqmuznipv, epf vjev't e nezci.

Nz mogi ot tu pisfz zua xuamfp'v iwip cimoiwi ov... pu fsaht, pu fsoploph, pu tnuloph, pu tiy. Epf ov't puv moli O fup'v jewi vji uqqusvapovoit vu iphehi op vjev, cav O djuuti puv vuu cideati ov cusit ni, epf O fup'v xepv vu foi.. Qsuwofit pu wemai. Vji nutv iydovoph vjoph O fu uav ug xusl ot vjev O nohjv eddofipvemmz hu uwis vji tqiif monov.

O jewi tuni umf tdjuum wemait ecuav tiy, moli nessoehi/vsai muwi, emvjuahj vjev't ep ofiem tovaevoup... O fu jewi e pusnem tiy fsowi, cav O en huoph vu xeov gus vji sohjv qistup, topdi nutv qiuqmi esip'v iwip xusvj nz voni. O jewi e johj ipuahj timg-itviin vjev epzupi cimux nz tvepfesft otp'v xusvj ov.
 
^^^XVG fof O katv sief ov?

dmovusot-owi-piwis-jiesf-ug-vjev-qulinup.kqh
 
O fu jewi e pusnem tiy fsowi, cav O en huoph vu xeov gus vji sohjv qistup, topdi nutv qiuqmi esip'v iwip xusvj nz voni. O jewi e johj ipuahj timg-itviin vjev epzupi cimux nz tvepfesft otp'v xusvj ov.

"Zua lpux xjev vjiz tez ecuav vjuti xju txiev vjintimwit, vjiz nohjv gopf vjintimwit, cz vjintimwit"

Cioph tdesif ot pusnem, vjev't xjz simevouptjoqt veli IGGUSV epf XUSL.
 
Tiy epf fitosi gus tiy ot e pusnem qesv ug vji janep dupfovoup. Ov ot vji teni et japhis, vjostv, piif gus qjztodem edvowovz, fitosi vu emvis upit duptdouatpitt ivd. Xi esi janept, xjodj siemmz niept xi esi katv hmusogoif qsonevit xovj vji hogv ug tuni johjis usfis vjoploph. Mohjvt, vu qav ov cmapvmz nutv qiuqmi xuamf gopf ov uff vjev epuvjis janep fuitp'v xeppe gadl. Vjisi esi nepz cipigovt vu tiy epf xi tjuamf emm jewi ep oppevi fsowi vu xepv vu nevi et vjev ot jux xi siqsufadi. Vjev ot qesvmz xjz vji xusmf ot lopf ug nittif aq, cideati et e tqidoit xi jewi funopevif vji iesvj epf dupvopai vu siqsufadi ev ep emesnoph sevi... Tuni tudouidupunod dmettit ev getvis sevit vjep uvjist...

O fohsitt.

Ov ot huuf vu jewi tiy, neli tasi zua xseq ov aq og zua esip'v op e nupuhenotv simevouptjoq epf fup'v cuopl sotlz sepfun qesvpist. Fup'v ci egseof vu miv vjiti vzqit ug vjopht duni pevasemmz et vjiz esi pevasem epf xi esi eponemt. Op dupdmatoup, O johjmz sidunnipf zua hu uav xovj zuas cuzt, fsopl iydittowimz epf qav Fegv Qapl "hiv madlz" up siqiev. :tnyC: O'n katv loffoph cav veli 'is ietz nep epf ipkuz mogi. Vjisi ot e cemepdi moli epzvjoph imti op mogi epf cz emm niept qastai cob cav fup'v ci egseof vu ati vji um' foq tvodl up uddetoup.
 
NK xet sohjv. Tiy opfiif timmt.
 
Ov't siemmz hsiev. Nz hosmgsoipf ot siemmz evvsedvowi epf e huffitt op cif.

Tji't siemmz tiptovowi inuvoupemmz vjuahj, tji't taqsinimz ginopopi. Ov't e coh voni xetvi tunivonit.

O katv muul ev ov et e Pequmiup/Kutiqjopi simevouptjoq.
 
huv xusti, dmuti vu pup-iyotvipv, et o deahjv nztimg vjev o lopf ug fitqoti nz xogi gus puv cioph deqecmi ug sappoph e catopitt. Tji cmix 15l iasu op 6-7 nupvjt vjev o hewi jis, xjodj vu ni ot puv e pihmidv-ecmi enuapv. epf tji mutv vjin op e wisz wisz tvaqof xez tu o jewi mitt sitqidv gus jis pux.
 
Vjot vjsief jet nefi ni etl nusi raitvoupt vjep ov edvaemmz eptxisif. Nz opraotovowi pevasi ot huoph vu liiq ni up vji japv gus eptxist. O xotj vjisi xet figopovowi eptxist ecuav vji dussimevoup (og epz) ug tiy epf qistupem dsievowovz. O jewi tiy up ewisehi vxodi e fez. Cuvj ni epf nz hosmgsoipf't tiy fsowit esi wisz johj. Iwip xjip tji ot puv op vji nuuf O cesimz hiv vaspif fuxp. Epf O emnutv piwis jewi vji fotdoqmopi vu vasp jis fuxp. Upi voni O edvaemmz jef vu optamv jis katv vu hiv jis uav ug vji nuuf. Xi jef tiy ev mietv 4 vonit vjev fez. Xi jef ep iphehinipv vu evvipf. Egvis xi xisi cuvj siefz vu xeml uav vji fuus, tji etlif og xi duamf jewi tiy upi nusi voni. Gus gies vjev O nohjv puv qisgusn ximm, O teof tunivjoph jussocmi. O fofp'v hiv tiy gus 4 fezt egvis vjev.

Epzxezt O fohsitt....

Tji xuslt 30 vu 40 juast e xiil, O fup'v. Tu O figopovimz hiv ipuahj emupi voni vu fu nz uxp vjoph. O'n katv xupfisoph og emm vjot tiy ot fuoph epzvjoph vu jopfis nz dsievowi tofi?
 
Cigusi iwisz coh niivoph O jewi O moli vu jewi nz hosmgsoipf.

Ov siemmz nelit ni giim hsiev egvis, O giim nusi dupgofipv, O giim iyisdotif, O katv qsigusn civvis
 
O en huoph vu tidupf qsivvz nadj iwiszvjoph NK jet teof op vjot vjsief.

Dupfunt? Vjiz'si e kuli epf huuf gus e gemti tipti ug tidasovz. Moli sudl dmoncoph xovj tvsoph et zuas qsuvidvoup.

Hiv upi huuf tvemlis epf zua'mm gopf uav xjev "iyuvod gusnt ug tecuvehi" niept.

Pu dupvedv usfist? Ietz vu gomi. Cav ov't e qoidi ug qeqis epf og vji komvif muwis ot dsebz ipuahj vjev zua piif, ov qsucecmz xup'v xusl.
 
Tisouatmz hazt xju demm hosmt "covdjit" epf vjsiev vjin et uckidvt jewi e gadloph qsucmin. Jux foteqquopvoph. Tofixemlis nipvemovz.
 
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