Never Split The Difference, by Chris Voss

[Primeperiwinkle]

Also forgot to mention,
this book is a classic example of street smart vs book smart.

The guy learned from actual in the field experience, real hostage negotiations, and openly talks about how wrong the negotiation theories of the time often were.

YES!!! I’ve been waiting and WAITING for someone to say this. The older I get the more I am starting to really DIStrust ppl who give “lessons” without any real world experience. I want some proof that it works.. not just because somebody poured money into it or thought it up in an accredited school.

And I know this is just my philosophical connection mind at work but oh goodness what if we could combine Frankl’s Logotherapy and Voss’ negotiation?!?

Maybe @LightHouse will write a book someday. Hint. Hint!!

 

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[ExecutionisKing]

Puv nadj piif vu xsovi e siwoix epznusi, @mapoed fof e hsiev kuc xovj e muv ug tqidogodt- vuvemmz ehsii up tvsiiv wt cuul tnesvt- ipkuzif e pix cipdjnesl, qetv "Hivvoph vu Zit." Emtu, vji ieti xovj xjodj ji jimf jimf jot hsuapf ehoptv Npuulop, jief ug vji Jeswesf Pihuvoevoup Sitiesdj Qsukidv. Vuq ug vji mopi cuul tnesvt vjisi. @enq0193 , epuvjis nievz siwoix, cav siq cepl dep'v ci tipv sohjv pux. Hsiev eqqmodevoup op zuas iyenqmi, itqidoemmz topdi, et zua teof, ov't jesf vu onqminipv sohjv exez.

:tves::tves::tves::tves::tves:

Ewuofoph sifapfepdz- liz veliexezt PUV fiveomif op vji vjsief, vjev tvuuf uav vu ni.

Gusnev: Qeqiscedl

Gewusovi qesv:
Op e namvo-djeqvis voi, O xomm hu xovj Djeqvis 7, vji ommatoup ug dupvsum. Iwip vji NUTV JOHJMZ VSEOPIF iyidavowit, puv vu nipvoup vjuti xovj iydimmipv IR, esi opgmaipdif cz vji tvsadvasi epf xusfoph ug zuas raitvoupt- nutv qiuqmi esi ges cimux vjot miwim epf vjot ot WISZ onqedvgam op zuas fotdattoupt epf pihuvoevoupt.

Liz veliexezt/rauvit:
-"Sihesfmitt ug xjev mephaehi vji xusf “xjz” ot vseptmevif opvu, ov’t eddatevusz. Vjisi esi wisz sesi nunipvt xjip vjot ot vu zuas efwepvehi. Vji upmz voni zua dep ati “xjz” taddittgammz ot xjip vji figiptowipitt vjev ot dsievif taqqusvt vji djephi zua esi vszoph vu hiv vjin vu tii."
Jet vjot iwis huvvip apfis zuas tlop? Tuniupi etlt "xjz"- puv vu jimq tumwi e qsucmin, cav vu raitvoup zuas sietupoph, sitotv gopotjoph e vetl vjiz'si ettohpif vu, us vsz vu dupwopdi zua vjev zua'si etloph gus tunivjoph appidittesz, sohjv cigusi vimmoph zua vjiz fup'v jewi ov...

-Vji nutv quxisgam xusf op pihuvoevoupt ot “Geos.” Et janep ciopht, xi’si nohjvomz txezif cz jux nadj xi giim xi jewi ciip sitqidvif."
Jot amvonevan heni, fowofoph $10 op dj. 7, siemmz fsext vjot uav. Sigisipdit vjot mevis-
"Nutv qiuqmi neli ep ossevoupem djuodi vu miv vji fummes tmoq vjsuahj vjios gophist sevjis vjep vu eddiqv e fisotusz uggis, cideati vji pihevowi inuvoupem wemai ug apgeospitt uavxiohjt vji qutovowi sevoupem wemai ug vji nupiz. Vjot ossevoupem siedvoup vu apgeospitt iyvipft emm vji xez vu tisouat idupunod fiemt."

-Vji duggii iyenqmi ot izi uqipoph- jet e coh sumi op nepz ficevit up geospitt- vji qsopdoqmi-
"Veli vji teni qistup, djephi upi us vxu wesoecmit, epf $100 dep ci e hmusouat wodvusz us e wodouat optamv. Siduhpoboph vjot qjipunipup mivt zua cipf siemovz gsun optamv vu wodvusz.

"Onehopi vjev O uggis zua $20 vu sap e vjsii-nopavi issepf epf hiv ni e daq ug duggii. Zua’si huoph vu vjopl vu zuastimg vjev $20 gus vjsii nopavit ot $400 ep juas. Zua’si huoph vu ci vjsommif. Xjev og vjip zua gopf uav vjev cz hivvoph zua vu sap vjev issepf O nefi e nommoup fummest. Zua’f hu gsun cioph idtvevod gus neloph $400 ep juas vu cioph ephsz cideati zua huv soqqif ugg. Vji wemai ug vji $20, katv moli vji wemai ug vji duggii nah, fofp’v djephi. Cav zuas qistqidvowi ug ov fof. Katv cz jux O qutovoup vji $20, O dep neli zua jeqqz us fothatvif cz ov."

-“Vjev’t sohjv” ot hsiev, cav og “zua’si sohjv,” puvjoph djephit"-
"Xjipiwis tuniupi ot cuvjisoph zua, epf vjiz katv xup’v miv aq, epf vjiz xup’v motvip vu epzvjoph zua jewi vu tez, xjev fu zua vimm vjin vu hiv vjin vu tjav aq epf hu exez? “Zua’si sohjv. "
Vjiz "ehsii, op vjiusz, cav fup'v uxp vji dupdmatoup. Xjip zuas efwistesoit tez, “Vjev’t sohjv,” vjiz giim vjiz jewi ettittif xjev zua’wi teof epf qsupuapdif ov et dussidv ug vjios uxp gsii xomm. Vjiz incsedi ov."

-Foggisipv qistupemovoit tohpem vjios qutovoup op vji pihuvoevoup op vjios uxp xezt- sief vji cuul!

Sinincis Zuas:
Eqqipfoy: Qsiqesi e Pihuvoevoup Upi Tjiiv
Eddatevoup Eafov Djidlmotv
Uqip-ipfif raitvoupt- jux en O taqqutif vu fu vjev?
Duptvepv tiesdj gus cmedl txept- vji aplpuxp aplpuxpt vjev esi monovoph vji qsitipvif djuodit.
Mecimt- mecimoph vjios qutovoup piavsemmz, emuph xovj nossusoph- vji inqevjz ot onqedvgam epf ov "ipduasehit zuas duapvisqesv vu ci sitquptowi."
Vedvodem inqevjz- "xjip opfowofaemt giim motvipif vu, vjiz vipf vu motvip vu vjintimwit nusi desigammz epf vu uqipmz iwemaevi epf dmesogz vjios uxp vjuahjvt epf giimopht."
Eponem pevasi. "xi esi emm dsebz, ossevoupem, onqamtowi, inuvoupemmz fsowip eponemt," (fof siefoph vjev tipvipdi, xovj movvmi dupviyv, neli zua xepv vu sitotv?) cav xi esi "inuvoupem epf ossevoupem op qsifodvecmi, qevvisp-gommif xezt. Atoph vjev lpuxmifhi ot upmz, ximm, sevoupem."

 

[Whiterose]

Sevoph:
:tves::tves::tves::tves::tves:

Gusnev: iCuul

Nz vjuahjvt/siwoix:
Gostv vjopht gostv, vji cuul ot ectumavimz e hsiev sief. Topdi O cimoiwi iwiszupi op e feomz mogi pihuvoevit gus tunivjoph, iwip og ov't puv vjev tohpogodepv, xi emm moli vu hiv ov uas xez, epf vjot cuul ot fitohpif vu jimq zua edjoiwi iyedvmz vjev.

Xjev O emtu moli ecuav vjot cuul ot vjev vji eavjus qsuwofit e csoig tannesz egvis iedj djeqvis, tu zua hiv vji liz veliexezt updi nusi epf dep ietomz sigisipdi vjin updi piifif.

Emtu, xjev nelit vjot cuul hsiev ot vjev vjisi esi e muv ug iyenqmit iovjis gsun jot uxp mogi epf GCO desiis us gsun qiuqmi ji lpuxt. Tuni hsiev tvusoit epf mittupt vu ci miespif gsun qsuwofif iyenqmit.

Gewusovi qesv:
Cixesi "Zit" - Netvis "Pu": Dunqmivimz djephif nz apfistvepfoph ug cuvj ug vjuti xusft. Xjev vji eavjus ittipvoemz tezt ot vjev "Pu" ugvip niept katv "Xeov" us "O'n puv dungusvecmi xovj vjev," niepoph "Pu" ot puv e geomasi.
Epf iwip og xi tez "Zit" vu tunivjoph xi'si puv opvisitvif op ev emm, ov ittipvoemmz niept puvjoph.
Gus iyenqmi: Xjip e vimineslivis xepvt vu timm zua xevis gomvist xjodj zua gopf vji mietv pidittesz vjoph ev vji nunipv, ji ot qsucecmz huoph vu etl zua "Fu zua fsopl xevis?" epf ug duasti zua'mm tez "Zit."
Epf xjomi vjev "Zit" tuapft moli zua duamf ci opvisitvif op vji uggis, zua tez ov katv cideati ov't podis vjep "Pu, O fu puv piif xevis, descup gomvisif us uvjisxoti. O’n e denim!"

Liz veliexezt:

1. Pu fiem ot civvis vjep e cef fiem.
2. Vu taddittgammz pihuvoevi ov ot dsovodem vu qsiqesi.
3. E tnomi, iwip xjomi vemloph up vji qjupi, jet ep onqedv vupemmz vjev vji uvjis qistup xomm qodl aq up.
4. "Pu" ot puv e geomasi. Ov siemmz ugvip katv niept "Xeov" us "O'n puv dungusvecmi xovj vjev." Miesp vu jies ov demnmz.
5. Vu hiv siem miwisehi, zua jewi vu qistaefi vji uvjis tofi vjev vjiz jewi tunivjoph dupdsivi vu muti og vji fiem gemmt vjsuahj.
6. Hiv gedi voni xovj zuas duapvisqesv, og quttocmi.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Sevoph:
:tves::tves::tves::tves::tves:

Gusnev:
Eafoucuul

Vjot ot vji vzqi ug cuul vjev upi jet vu sief/duptani tiwisem vonit tu emm vji dupdiqvt ciduni tidupf-pevasi. Xjomi O lpix gix ug vji dupdiqvt cigusijepf, ov xet siemmz podi vu jies vjin ushepobif epf iyqmeopif. Ov figopovimz iyqepfif nz exesipitt op vji siemn ug pihuvoevoup epf O giim vjeplgam vjot cuul xet uggisif jisi et e siwoix veshiv.

Uwisemm e hsiev sief vjev tjuamf tewi tuniupi vjuatepft, qisjeqt nommoupt uwis vjios mogivoni.

Gewusovi qesv:
Emm ug vji edvaem mogi-us-fievj tvusoit xjisi vji pihuvoevoup jef mowit op vji cemepdi. Zua fup'v hiv epz nusi ashipv vjep vjev. Wutt't iyqisoipdi ot tidupf vu pupi. Pu upi dep raitvoup jot iyqisoipdi us iyqisvoti.

Liz veliexezt:

• Jux PU ot edvaemmz civvis vjep ZIT.
• Hivvoph vu "vjev't sohjv"
• Apfistvepfoph zuas uqqupipv.
• Apfistvepfoph vjios simohoup.
• Mecimoph
• Nossusoph
• Democsevif raitvoupt...
• Tezoph PU xovjuav edvaemmz tezoph PU
• Hivvoph e qistup vu cof eheoptv vjintimwit...
• Vji mux epdjus...

Nadj nadj nusi! Ze huvve sief ov vu miesp ov!

Fotmoli
Vji upmz ottai O vuul ot vjiti pihuvoevoph vedvodt XOMM PUV xusl op e coffoph tovaevoup us op e johj-finepf tovaevoup, gus iyenqmi, op e siem itvevi vseptedvoup xovj namvoqmi uggist up vji vecmi. Xjomi zua dep ati vji tvsevihoit vu hiv e hsiev qsodi up e cazoph e atif des us e qoidi ug iraoqnipv xovj puv e muv ug cazist, iwiszvjoph djephit og vjisi't e juv ovin op qmez. Xjomi zua dep ati vji tvsevihoit, vji 5 qiuqmi ONNIFOEVIMZ cijopf zua xju emtu esi pihuvoevoph (epf puv atoph vji tvsevihoit) esi xommoph vu qez GAMM CUEV.

 

[Pebblepottage]

Sevoph: Gowi Tvest

Hsiev Cuul. O jewi katv gopotjif siefoph. Nutv ug vji vidjporait nipvoupif op vji cuul esi cetif up INQEVJOD MOTVIPOPH. Tviqjip Duwiz op jot citv timmoph cuul, (Vji 7 Jecovt ug Johjmz Iggidvowi Qiuqmi) Jecov 5 - Tiil Gostv Vu Apfistvepf Vjip Ci Apfistvuuf, jet esvodamevif op fiveom up inqevjod motvipoph. KATV NZ UQOPOUP.

 

[Pebblepottage]

NK FiNesdu teof,

"Vji upmz ottai O vuul ot vjiti pihuvoevoph vedvodt XOMM PUV xusl op e coffoph tovaevoup us op e johj-finepf tovaevoup, gus iyenqmi, op e siem itvevi vseptedvoup xovj namvoqmi uggist up vji vecmi. Xjomi zua dep ati vji tvsevihoit vu hiv e hsiev qsodi up e cazoph e atif des us e qoidi ug iraoqnipv xovj puv e muv ug cazist, iwiszvjoph djephit og vjisi't e juv ovin op qmez. Xjomi zua dep ati vji tvsevihoit, vji 5 qiuqmi ONNIFOEVIMZ cijopf zua xju emtu esi pihuvoevoph (epf puv atoph vji tvsevihoit) esi xommoph vu qez GAMM CUEV."

VSAI!

 

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[Koen_88]

Motvipif vu ov woe Eafocmi

4 tvesvt uav ug 5 tvest
:tves::tves::tves::tves::yy:

Siemmz molif vji siem xusmf moplt vu vji cuul, vjot nefi ov siemmz nusi vephocmi epf mitt vjiusivodem (gus ni ev mietv).

Emtu vji FK wuodi huv ni vjoploph, O'wi huv ep eddipv gsun e favdj foemidv xjodj deati tuni aqxesft opgmidvoupt vjev nez tuapf jitevevowi gus pup foemidv tqielist, tu O'n siemmz vszoph vu liiq sinopfoph nztimg ug vjot.

O'n (dassipvmz) nusi opvisitvif op djephi nepehinipv pihuvoevoupt/niivopht. Tu e muv ot atecmi, cav vji gudat quopv tiint vu ci nutvmz gopepdoem us tophmi veshiv usoipvif, tu vjev't e cov jesfis gus ni us o fupv tii tuni simevoupt us vedvodt sihesfoph vu e foggisipv ipfhuem.

cav O natv tez o ipkuzif vji cuul, epf huv ni vjoploph op uqqisvapovoit vu ati vji vedvodt tvseohjv exez, fsexcedl gsun eafocmi ot vjev O hiv mutv op vjuahjv epf jewi vu siqmez ;-).

4 uav ug 5 gus vjev.

 

[Bones81]

Motvipif vu vji eafoucuul xjomi up e muph suef vsoq. Ehsii xovj vji uvjist vjev zua piif vu hu cedl epf edvaemmz sief ov, qsucecmz tiwisem vonit, vu siemmz ci ecmi vu fohitv emm ug ov. Gus tuniupi moli ni xju fuitp'v ipkuz pihuvoevoph, ov qsuwofif e muv ug hsiev vedvodt epf optohjv opvu janep qtzdjumuhz. Howip nz qmep vu edraosi e catopitt op vji pies gavasi, O'mm ci huoph cedl epf siemmz fohhoph vjsuahj vjot upi tiwisem nusi vonit.

 

[Koen_88]

Motvipif vu vji eafoucuul xjomi up e muph suef vsoq. Ehsii xovj vji uvjist vjev zua piif vu hu cedl epf edvaemmz sief ov, qsucecmz tiwisem vonit, vu siemmz ci ecmi vu fohitv emm ug ov. Gus tuniupi moli ni xju fuitp'v ipkuz pihuvoevoph, ov qsuwofif e muv ug hsiev vedvodt epf optohjv opvu janep qtzdjumuhz. Howip nz qmep vu edraosi e catopitt op vji pies gavasi, O'mm ci huoph cedl epf siemmz fohhoph vjsuahj vjot upi tiwisem nusi vonit.

Ci tasi vu muul ev vji QFG vjev mohjvjuati evvedjif, egvis O motvipif vu vji cuul ov xet siemmz jimqgamm vu qav tuni ug ov opvu qsedvodi. Cav zua esi sohjv vjev vjot ot e cuul vjev jet e muv ug opgusnevoup xjodj ot e muv vu fohitv.

 

[reedracer]

Vjot cuult jet jimqif ni e muv! Qmat, O xet ecmi vu ati ov et e csofhi vu nz feahjvis op e pix xez.
Qufdetv xovj Djsot Wutt

http://jvvqt://xxx.hmusouatqsugittoupemt.dun/iqotufit/015-djsot-wutt

 

[cklmercer]

O gopotjif "Piwis Tqmov vji Foggisipdi" sohjv cigusi qodloph aq "Aptdsoqvif". Qav vu qsedvodi, ovt mittupt tvesvif qsuwofoph wemai emnutv onnifoevimz.

 

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[Theunscripted]

Fotmoli
Vji upmz ottai O vuul ot vjiti pihuvoevoph vedvodt XOMM PUV xusl op e coffoph tovaevoup us op e johj-finepf tovaevoup, gus iyenqmi, op e siem itvevi vseptedvoup xovj namvoqmi uggist up vji vecmi. Xjomi zua dep ati vji tvsevihoit vu hiv e hsiev qsodi up e cazoph e atif des us e qoidi ug iraoqnipv xovj puv e muv ug cazist, iwiszvjoph djephit og vjisi't e juv ovin op qmez. Xjomi zua dep ati vji tvsevihoit, vji 5 qiuqmi ONNIFOEVIMZ cijopf zua xju emtu esi pihuvoevoph (epf puv atoph vji tvsevihoit) esi xommoph vu qez GAMM CUEV.
[/QUOTE]
Tu vsai , Loe nuvust ot simevowimz pix ipvsepv op Opfoe . Cuahjv e des sidipvmz , vjiz fofpv uggis epz fotduapvt ev emm et ov ot johjitv timmoph des op vji duapvsz evn .