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That is exactly the problem. You place to much pressure on yourself to perform, to do something new, different, produce, etc. This pressure is counter-productive. Your mind isn't free and you will not find what you're looking for until the mind is free. Hence, you create that vicious circle of wanting to do something productive which you cannot find because of the pressure you place on yourself. That was exactly my problem too.How do you not go crazy not doing anything for 6 months? If I take it easy I get stressed thinking I should be making more money or doing something productive.
I don't know you and I don't know your finances. I only have some ideas that come up now about what you could do that makes you feel productive without pressure: volunteer work, find a job in an industry that interests you (even if you have enough finances), learn a new skill. Perhaps backpacking will work for you too?
If it's a burnout you would probably know: extremely bad sleep, a racing mind before you get to sleep and the moment you wake up (early), extreme fatigue during the day and usually a very bad mood. But honestly to me it feels like you're on the edge now. At least I recognize some patterns that I had. If that's true, I really want you to avoid stepping over the edge. Because once you cross that line, recovery is going to take soooo much longer and the journey is not fun.It might be burnout or it might be something else. I don't know.
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