Do you whine at job interviews too?
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Free registration at the forum removes this block.So I don't want to get burned again going for a job as a programmer.
I'm a loser. I've done nothing for a year! I worked as a real estate agent for a month and I hated it because all I could do was drink after contacting way too many people and not showing enough. Of course I was inexperienced and I didn't market as much but I didn't have any funds and I put up way too many excuses. I don't have much to believe in.
I find myself almost a year since that day I decided to intern in the profession and I haven't made money since I quit the job, actually, back in January. I'm pretty much breaking down and I have nothing to believe in, or not much to believe in. I'm currently on the 1st day of the Bold and Determined Program; it's almost over, the day. I just need to get my 100 squats/push-ups/crunches in (which will happen before bed; but I'm too anxious to do any right now). I don't have much to believe in except this program.
I just don't know how to make money fast and I feel like time has finally caught up to me. All of my ex-friends, because I have no friends, now have jobs. Even the dumbest person in my math class works as a research analyst. And I got rejected from two interviews even though the interviewer liked me, but he wasn't the decision maker. I don't know if I should just get a job, because I always get rejected. I don't know if I should freelance, because when I did, I wrote two java programs for $12. And I don't know if I should network, because I don't trust anyone.
All I know is I want to make money, but I don't have anyone to believe in. The only thing I believe in is this B&D program. But I don't even believe in the writer. Because of the negative things everyone says about him and his success, like how he advertises bluehost and how that's a bad practice. It's like everywhere I go, I'm looking for the wrong answers and I get them.
Where do we go from here? EDIT: (On the plus side, I can't remember the last time I had a sip of alcohol - must have been over a few months now.) Oh yeah, I also have $0 in my bank. Also, I'm setting a goal to make money - part of the program I'm on is to set a definite and specific goal. I definitely want to make some money and specifically more of it. But how?
Then get a job.
Well I went to college, got a Bachelor's in Applied Math, and was hoping to work as a programmer/developer/research analyst (like my friend who failed way more classes, got worse grades, partied more, and still gets paid more ???????????????????).
Well, how do I go on?
I've been doing data science for the past couple of weeks and it's been going good. But I'm heavily losing interest in it because there's people who want me to work with certain data sets and I want to work with my own, although I'm sure they're both as interesting. I'm not even getting remotely paid yet, but I'm getting some perks along the way...and I guess I'm growing somewhat...BUT I WANT MONEY AND NOTHING ELSE REALLY MATTERS.
Its the easiest way to some money. But freedom will eventually become important too.
Jobs are training wheels. Some can learn without them, but they are a useful step for most. Most people, though, never even consider taking them off.
Well then get a job as a teacher ... Or start a business. Either way get on with it and quit your bitching. At least to yourselfTeachers are in demand but it's a slowlane dead-end $40k for life.
Well, I can't help but like this. Plus your profile pic, even if it is of Denzel. It just communicates "here, there's another path."
I'm really lost right now. I think I'm going to go back to square one. That's why I'm wondering here. Maybe programming isn't for me. Maybe it's not them, it's me. I'm just not a good fit for a programmer. And that's why I'm wondering how you can make money online.
To be honest, I don't know. Square one...I don't want to work for a 9-5 job because of all of the things I've heard "Oh but you won't be financially free!", "I get to travel the world because I blogged", etc.
I'm a loser. I've done nothing for a year!
I worked as a real estate agent for a month and I hated it because all I could do was drink after contacting way too many people and not showing enough. Of course I was inexperienced and I didn't market as much but I didn't have any funds and I put up way too many excuses. I don't have much to believe in.
I find myself almost a year since that day I decided to intern in the profession and I haven't made money since I quit the job, actually, back in January.
I don't have much to believe in except this program.
I just don't know how to make money fast
All of my ex-friends, because I have no friends
And I got rejected from two interviews even though the interviewer liked me, but he wasn't the decision maker. I don't know if I should just get a job, because I always get rejected.
I don't know if I should freelance, because when I did, I wrote two java programs for $12.
And I don't know if I should network, because I don't trust anyone.
All I know is I want to make money, but I don't have anyone to believe in.
It's like everywhere I go, I'm looking for the wrong answers and I get them.
Well, I can't help but like this. Plus your profile pic, even if it is of Denzel. It just communicates "here, there's another path."
I'm really lost right now. I think I'm going to go back to square one. That's why I'm wondering here. Maybe programming isn't for me. Maybe it's not them, it's me. I'm just not a good fit for a programmer. And that's why I'm wondering how you can make money online.
To be honest, I don't know. Square one...I don't want to work for a 9-5 job because of all of the things I've heard "Oh but you won't be financially free!", "I get to travel the world because I blogged", etc.
Just some real talk for you - I feel annoyed and kind of sick even reading your comments because they're negative, whiny, and depict the exact person i try to avoid and never be like. I would highly suggest taking a good look at how you appear to yourself and the world and changing it for the better.
It is you. But that's the good news because while you can't change them (whoever 'them" is), you can change yourself. I've rarely got a job, a gig or a new client if deep down I wasn't enthusiastic about it. Even if you say all the right things, if you're not certain, people see through it.
For some of us, getting a job is the best thing that can happen. Yes, jobs are not fastlane and have all kinds of disadvantages. But, when you don't have a clue what the hell you are doing with your life, you still need to eat and put a rough over your head. In the past, I gravitated towards being in business for myself for all the wrong reasons, all ego driven desires to be in control and not get my feelings hurt - none of them good reasons to start a business.
In the past couple of years I've had a string of employers. I've learned to deal with very demanding customers and employers, and for the most part not even get rattled by them. I've learned how to resolve customer complaints. I learned how to take a dysfunctional team of people and have them work like a tight knit family. All on someone else's dime.
For some, success is intuitive. Most of us are here because its not. When I started t get excited about the idea of having great wealth and freedom, I had no idea how much bullshit I had in my head about how life works. I had a ton of personal development to do before I could ever hope to be successful in business.
There are no quick fixes. Get a job. Get your head sorted out. Feel free to quit the job when it starts to cost you more to keep it than to lose it.
You know you're free after you get your degree right?If I was 25 I would probably have some money by now.
My parents pretty much influenced me. They told me since I went to college I should only apply for desk jobs. I was ready to apply for a retail job at Microsoft "to get my foot in" but then my dad was like, "$8? Are you nuts?" and I didn't go to the open house.
Then I try asking him if I can join him in working in construction (which pays him good) and he tells me it's too hot and arid, there's people that faint doing that, but I don't really care. He still wants me working a desk job. I feel stuck.
Edit Here, let me add on to that edit:
I wanted to be a high school teacher. I seriously considered it after playing soccer with someone and he encouraged me. Then, I asked my godfather for advice (he has a PhD in education and has been a teacher for over 10 years) and after asking him for advice, all he told me was it's going to be extremely hard, maybe it's not for you, etc. And basically discouraged me. My own godfather, who i (once looked up to), discouraged me.
I'm on the rocks about making a decision about anything, and it seems like this forum is the only place that encourages me to do things. So I've been leaning towards going to the school board again, because I can make some money, and people tell me i'm just wasting my intelligence.
And lastly, on top of all of this, what if I find in my social group there are some high school teachers? If I ask them for advice, will they give me the same BS? Will everyone? Should I just ignore everyone? I used to ignore everyone and it worked out well getting me into college.
Well, how do I go on?Why do you think the majority of people get jobs instead of starting businesses? Its because guys like us toil on with next to nothing, driving burned out cars and struggling to make ends meet while the people around us drive brand new audis and spend thousands on a new kitchen for their fancy home. Normally all financed. Then we fail and look stupid for not following the beaten track. Keep plodding on. It won't be instant, or easy that's for sure. It may feel like everyone is doing better now but the biggest rewards come with the biggest sacrifices.
But they're getting paid, and that's why I'm mad.Being envious of these guys is like being envious of a trapped animal, because the animal got bait.
Well, I can't help but like this. Plus your profile pic, even if it is of Denzel. It just communicates "here, there's another path."Your profile picture is you squatting. As such, I'm going to assume you also deadlift.
Remember when you first started lifting? I don't know about you, but I went gung-ho on the deadlift, and stupidly decided that gloves were only for pussies.
As a result, I tore the shit out of my hands almost every time from the weight slipping. Blood, missing skin...all of it. It was rough as hell, and sometimes bad enough that I had to take a few sessions off to let my hands recover. It was stupid, but I was set in my ways.
Time went on, blood was spilled (don't worry, I sanitized the bar every time) and I continued to be a dipshit. Looking back, I could've done things differently. I could've gotten straps, I could've just used some gloves..anything to avoid tearing my hands like that. But I didn't.
Years later, exactly where that damned bar used to claim countless layers of skin...I have massive, tough callouses. A knife couldn't cut through these bad boys. And I can deadlift gloveless to my heart's content with no more spilled blood.
Maybe you f*cked up in previous interviews. Maybe you could've done things differently. Maybe you're tired of getting burned, having that emotional layer of skin ripped off by every rejection.
But you know what you have that your well-paid partying friend doesn't? You have those callouses man. He "put on the gloves" by getting a cushy job quickly. You've torn yourself up, bled countless times, and had to keep picking yourself up.
If and WHEN he loses those gloves, his hands are soft. He hasn't bled. Not like you have. You're tougher. Literally.
Embrace the burns. Embrace the lost skin, the rejections, and the pain.
Because at the end of the day, YOU will be the one with the callouses. And it's *those* tough motherfuckers, the ones that have bled without the gloves, that conquer the world.
Why have you done nothing for a year?
What makes you a loser, exactly?
You are still putting up excuses. Why?
What has kept you from making any money?
What's so special about that program? Is that program the 'secret sauce' you've been missing?
Pushups and situps are the missing piece? Are they? Really?
How fast do you expect to make money?
Why don't you have any friends if you haven't been making any money?
Rejected from two interviews = always rejected?
$12 is more than $0, is it not? How many $12 programs can you do per day? Can you do a $50, $100, $500 program?
If you could trust people again, would you network?
If you had someone to believe in, and you could choose who that person is, would you make money?
What if that person was yourself? If you could believe in yourself, would you make money?
If you could find the right answer, would somehow your luck just magically change overnight?
What if finding the right answer just meant looking for an answer, right or wrong? What if there was no right answer? Would you still make money?
If you just knew the one thing, the one weird trick to follow that could make you money, would you do it?
[/QUOTE]Because I've attempted various pursuits such as being a pro soccer player, C++ developer, Java developer, and they've all been fruitless in terms of earning enough revenue to pay even a month's worth of rent.
I do not earn enough money.
I don't know what the truth is.
Fear of begging (i.e. "Hey, want to donate $5?" to a stranger)
It's a set of habits
Irrelevant
Really fast, like I offer some value and then I get a money trade-off. To be honest, I don't really know how it works...
I don't trust anyone. Everyone wants something from me.
People tell me to go the entrepreneurial way, i.e. "I've quit my job and so can you" so I've stopped.
No. I need a new outlet...I just seem very uncertain.
Yes!
No
Yes
Yes!
Yes
Work hard, hustle...it's all been fruitless ever since I've done this with programming.
I was sort of in your position around 1.5 year ago (before I read TMF ).
To make myself more appealing for employers, I started up a university society.
I deliberately delayed my graduation by 6 months to see my university society flourish.
I pitched at major gym franchises and supplement stores. I even got to meet the co-founders for sponsorship.
Despite all the confusion and embarrassment, I managed to signed up more than 150 people for my fitness society.
But it's a university society - so I made jack. But I learned tons.
My parents were sort of disappointed in me for wasting time instead of going to law school ASAP.
I have to admit - I was dumb. Stupid. Naive. Ignorant.
THIS plus all the stupid shit I did in the past - I'm already two years behind all my peers who went to law school.
I might be going off-track here.
But here's my message to you.
YOU WILL HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE.
I even deferred law school for 6 months because I was confused about EVERYTHING just like you.
Then I realized that Fastlane (and life in general) is a marathon (quote from a forum member). Things take time. LOTS OF IT.
Now I'm trying to finish my post-grad so I can get a steady job while supplementing my side business. And this is not even the end of story.
I know I will fail many, many times. Probably cry behind closed doors. Get laughed at. Or have only hundreds of dollars left in bank account while friends are buying houses and Bimmers.
So it's normal to feel all these crazy emotions.
Everyone on TMF (including me) can't help you get rid of your demons and fears.
But keep moving forward.
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