Thoughts on changing your NAME (and IDENTITY)? Both the first AND the last!!

[Lex DeVille]

Stop what?

Forget it. It doesn't matter. Critical thinking is uncommon around here now. This forum needs a CT 101 course for members new and old.

 

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[Pain Brain]

Forget it. It doesn't matter. Critical thinking is uncommon around here now. This forum needs a CT 101 course for members new and old.

Okay. Sorry if I offended you.

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

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[Mattie]

What is there to "lose"? Can you define what is a "victory" and what is a "defeat" (IN LIFE, not at the poker table)? What is really "yours" that you are afraid of losing when betting it all? Your jewels, the titles, lands, dogshit (Sorry I mean "money"), etc. ?

"Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."
-Steve Jobs

Is even the life you live REALLY 'yours'? Can you define 'you'? When were you actually "born"? Was it when a smaller body was pulled out of a bigger body? Or was it when a sperm met an ova? Or perhaps when your "birth-parents" looked at each other with a smirk in their eye? Or perhaps when they planned for a baby and co-created an idea of you? Or perhaps it was when you were just a whisp of imagination in either of their heads before they met?

Can you point out exactly what is a human neck? Where does the head end and the neck really begin? Where precisely? Are the nouns and objects really real or is it just a world of verbs, just a world of "happening"?

Death? Or the illusion of death? (Whatever you wanna call it depending on your tastes)

When do we "die"? Is it when the brain stops functioning? (Latest research says that ain't true). Or is it when we compromise on what we really want and start to exist instead of being truly alive?

Don't we have zero control on when that death cometh? Can you really tell when? All we know is that I am going to die, you are going to die and everyone reading this post is going to die. Your death maybe today, mine tomorrow or vice-versa, does it really matter?

Is there any shit that we can take with us? No money, no jewels, no lands, no titles, no boats, no spaceships, no legacy, no terracotta army, no dogshit, no horseshit, no turds of any kind. No?

Unless you keep different tastes and really truly believe that some guy flew to heaven on a winged horse at the time of his death, or some guy hung on a stick and slaughtered in cold blood, suddenly rose from the dead and started walking, or keep company with such prophets in todays times who claim who can make the dead walk. (In which case, you shouldn't shed one tear when your loved one dies -- you should really be happy that the person is "watching over you" and dancing in pink clouds as happy as pinkworms in a baby's stool. If you cry at that funeral, then you are just fooling yourself and deep down you already know its all horseshit).

When you consider all that, what does it all come down to eventually? Isn't it all just down to that ONE choice in the end? The choice on choosing the MANNER IN WHICH YOU WILL MEET YOUR DEATH?

We all have different tastes. Mine just happens to be a certain way. This video summarizes the MANNER in which I'll go. (Sorry, but you really need to watch the movie 'The Eternal Zero' for more context).

A person at a mental health crisis hotline asked me once what I truly give a F*ck about. Back then I didn't have an answer. Now I do. Its what's in the eyes of that pilot as he goes for that carrier. Its the expression on his face as he dives for one last time among all those screeching bullets and goes straight for opening that F*cking deck. The smile on his face as he is looking directly in the eyes of death and the jaws of the odds as he maxes full speed in the rush to the grave.
I honestly don't give a F*ck about anything else. Only that is true wealth to me. Rest all is 'stuff' and 'shit' in my little world.

I think that would amount to giving zero F*cks, but you can be reckless, violent to self, others, and smash and crash just because your wild and free. Doesn't make you richer by exiting as soon as possible. You have to live your life to the fullest. James Dean is still a living legend, no one ever forgets his life or death.

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

[Spenny]

Wouldn't that be true only because you believe it to be true and you expect it to be that way tomorrow?
What if I expect myself to wake up a different way?
Could my expectations around what will happen tomorrow, make it a different tomorrow altogether?

I don't mean anything mean or snarky really but you'd be happy to know that I actually did show up to the gym just like I said I would and I exceeded my expectations on the workout I had. I enjoyed the whole thing as well.

Can you talk more on what you mean? Clarify please?
Why would it make a difference if I saw a hooker with or without abs? Also, it doesn't look like it to you, does it? Doesn't look like I am working right now, does it?
What does all this look like to you? Am I meeting the definition of moving in the direction of a valid aspiration of myself from the looks of what I talk about in this thread?

Yeah actually a SICKENING, DISGUSTING, RIDICULOUS amount of work to do.

But all of it doesn't fade away. Only the action fades away as it becomes a memory, but I get to keep the experience and take it to my grave.
The only reason why I would actually consider a LTR with a woman (and I see women as some of the best pieces of creation, btw) is because it would make it cheaper to do in monetary terms what I do with these women.
The hookers are a crutch FOR NOW. It won't be that way forever. Also, I COMMAND lust; it is not the other way around.

Yes, because they are 'people'?

Is it okay to have the AUDACITY OF BELIEF and ARROGANCE OF FAITH?

Again, just a question. But I would like to see what you have to say to this one.

Thanks for being open-minded and non-judgmental. We need more of you in the world.

Yeah, bud, I DO want to change. And the change is already in motion. We'll get there.

Same!
And just because I haven't responded to every post in this thread (yet) doesn't mean I am not grateful for the time you took to help me out. I will get back to you if I haven't yet. In the meantime, I want you to know that I am working.

I usually do a more in-depth response to all of my posts, but I'm a bit short of time.

It's fantastic you went to the gym; I didn't doubt you wouldn't. I think front-loading is a just good practice in general. I am not rooting for your demise.

Concerning relationships, I think it may be a better use of time to begin tearing down crutches for things that need to be done, which I'm sure you're doing. I'm not for or against LTMs or hookers, nor for them; it's just that when serious work has to be done, or we are called to it, we have to do it.

As I said, I'm sure you're doing this stuff, but name changes won't add much. Alter egos, though? They work and have worked for many—no need to change names legally.

 

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[Lex DeVille]

It's hard to believe the forum has so many name change experts.

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

[DarkKnight]

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[DarkKnight]

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[DarkKnight]

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[DarkKnight]

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[PureA]

What's a "fake" name? When does a name become "real"? Who's judging?

A fake name is when someone uses a name that isn't theirs...I'm judging, because it has proven to be useful and save time dealing with morons. e.g. as soon as I meet 'Max Power' at the gym I know I am in for a wild ride of bs.

 

[DarkKnight]

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[PureA]

What name is "yours"?

My real name, the one on my passport.

As for gender, I'm non-binary.

 

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[DarkKnight]

NA

 

[PureA]

Which can be "Big Dickus" or Rambo or Godzilla. Then if its on the passport, it makes it "real"?
So when you meet "Max Power", what if the F*cker got that thing down on his passport? And showed it to you? Would your perception of him change or remain the same?

I don't know why this is so personal for you, if you want to change your name go ahead, free world.

My point was just that a fake name is a reliable indicator of a BS artist in my experience 9.9x/10.

I support you doing whatever the f you wanna do.

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

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[Lex DeVille]

THERAPY IS DONE FOR!! Thank you for bringing my awareness to the true issues at play. As long as these utter idiots talk to me, its going to be a never ending loop of more therapy followed by being more confused and f*cked up and more victimhood and pussyfication in a never ending circle of self destruction.

I REALLY don't have the words to thank you sir for saving me from therapy. You were the only one I think on this thread who actually gave that council.

@MJ DeMarco any chance of closing and removing this thread before half of these geniuses get sued for providing unqualified medical/mental health advice?

At least slap a disclaimer on the thread that this is not professional advice for the love of god.

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

[Simon Angel]

After a day of a hard workout, relatively better food, a cold shower and a walk in nature, I agree with you now. They were all wrong, you were right.

Except for the sun, I am going to follow everything you said here. In one year I will be back or in better shape that was once my prime.
This is one of my singlemost important goals for the next one year (and actually life from now on). Learnt my lesson.

Absolutely done sir!!

I met a guy today at the coffee shop. Talked for a few mins, helped me with my car, then he unexpectedly called me during the night and left a message telling me how I was loved and how he and his group of friends were praying for me (without me asking for it).
Changed my mind about the whole thing. He told me about this church where they have a brotherhood of some sort. Going there this weekend.

Again, you were right and I was wrong here. Those people do exist out there, I just never imagined they did before until I met one. Now I know there must be more.

My doctor broke confidentiality with a therapist that I had not given her permission for. Man, that F*cking hurt! Because I never lied to my doctor.
Yes, I agree. They are themselves confused and F*cked. Can't even talk straight and give a straight answer to a simple question.

THERAPY IS DONE FOR!! Thank you for bringing my awareness to the true issues at play. As long as these utter idiots talk to me, its going to be a never ending loop of more therapy followed by being more confused and f*cked up and more victimhood and pussyfication in a never ending circle of self destruction.
I REALLY don't have the words to thank you sir for saving me from therapy. You were the only one I think on this thread who actually gave that council. This is so important to me that I hope you will give me the honor of sending you a souvenir in remembrance and recognition of what you did here. You sir, literally saved my life !!! It was a pretty bad night at the start. Now I am not going anywhere. WTF was I even thinking all along. I wasn't suicidal when these people found me. It happened AFTER they F*cked me up with their "THERAPY". I don't know how you knew, but you somehow did know. And I am grateful for your counsel.

Why would they? Have you looked at them? F*ckED-UP. I wouldn't want to be either their child, their friend or their partner. I truly pity the people in relationships with these people.
Also, for every session, the therapist gets paid one way or the other. Irrespective of the outcome of the session, the therapist gets paid eitherway. Its neither in their interest span or under their set of skills or abilities to "cure" someone from an "illness" that they made up themselves in the first place. Its like inventing a disease, then the cure, only that in this case the cure inspires the creation of the disease instead of the other way around, what critical-thinking would tell you.

Of course they got more depressed. You just seemed to be REALLY watching what was going on instead of listening to the dogshit that's part of their propaganda. And you are a truth-teller. You don't care what people will say like me when telling the truth.
Thank you for saving me from VICTIMHOOD and PUSSY-FICATION.

Edit: I got a little too carried away. There is no "therapy and there is no "therapist". Its all in the head.

EPIPHANY: There is no "disease", and hence no "cure" is needed. Mental Health cured. Now lets do the work.

That isn't the way to go. This "epiphany" may give you a rush and feel empowering at first, but you'll inevitably come crashing down and then blame the forum for the bad advice you got.

I suggest you don't stop working with your therapist for now but do integrate the rest of the stuff you learned in this thread. I'm sure you'll be happy to see your therapist taking note of your good progress.

And whenever you make changes (like incorporating cold showers, a gym routine, or switching up your diet) it's important to minimize the variables (e.g. not suddenly stopping therapy) because it's much harder to read into the results—or lack thereof. Fail to do this and you'll be running in circles for a long, long time trying to figure out what worked and what didn't.

Lastly, you seem to have an external locus of control. It comes up in your writing a lot, so try taking this test and see your results. Be honest with your answers. And then, work on freeing yourself from your limiting beliefs.

 

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[DarkKnight]

NA

 

[Lex DeVille]

Do not delete it please, there is some important information here. It's ok, I have to learn the art of discernment as I will always be self-taught.
Disclaimer is upto you guys.

You've gone from one extreme position to another over a matter of hours. So when you say, "It's ok." That is not a good indicator of what is actually okay.

You're not the problem, though. It's a question of what others might do in the event this thread turns sour.

Maybe nothing happens.

But maybe someone opens a lawsuit against the posters in this thread, or maybe they open a lawsuit against MJ's business or against MJ himself. Maybe it goes somewhere, maybe it doesn't. In any event, it leads to time wasted, emotional investment, and financial involvement.

Where I am located, you cannot practice psychology without being a licensed clinical psychologist with an APA Accredited PhD and a minimum 3,000 hours of supervised internship. That means you cannot diagnose and you cannot advise about how to treat mental health concerns because if you're wrong and the result is someone's death, that's a big problem.

There's a reason attornies on websites like Avvo.com add a disclaimer to their signature line. These are professional, licensed lawyers and they STILL fear providing advice online because of where it can lead.

 

[DarkKnight]

You've gone from one extreme position to another over a matter of hours. So when you say, "It's ok." That is not a good indicator of what is actually okay.

Ok I understand

 

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[Bekit]

Hey @Dark Knight -
Just wanted to say that I care about what you're going through. You are a valuable person, and you matter. I'm sorry it has been so hard.

I'm rooting for you, and I'm glad to hear that exercise, better food, and walking in nature have made a difference.

I hope that you can find the love and acceptance that you've never really tasted.

I met a guy today at the coffee shop. Talked for a few mins, helped me with my car, then he unexpectedly called me during the night and left a message telling me how I was loved and how he and his group of friends were praying for me (without me asking for it).
Changed my mind about the whole thing. He told me about this church where they have a brotherhood of some sort. Going there this weekend.

Church can be hit or miss, but do try to find one that can help you understand the gospel message. Hopefully this one can.

The gospel offers you what you were looking for at the beginning of this thread - a new identity and a new name - not one propped up by self effort and ego, but one where it's more like you die and are reborn with a new father. It promises to make you a new person. It offers you love and acceptance. It gives you a mechanism for how you can walk in love and joy and peace, even in the midst of trials.

Regardless of whether you ultimately accept or reject the gospel, please at least try to understand the gospel message as completely as possible. It sounds like you might have been exposed to some Christian beliefs, such as the crucifixion and the resurrection, without having the understanding of the gospel message that makes sense of these points. (And just a reassurance - you don't have to believe the gospel to understand it - you can pursue this understanding and then make a decision about whether to accept any of it.)

Here's a good summary of what the gospel offers.

View: https://youtu.be/DPTTLWcau7s?si=1k4l3jib6-mReWI8


All the best to you!

 

[Here]

I am only trying get information from you. You didn't answer my question. Would having a strange name on a passport and showing it to people make it real to people or not? Would affect their perception or not of you?

I do think your legal name matters. I find myself needing to disclose my legal name all the time. And people tend to get confused if the name you are using is very different from your legal name.

i use an unusual nickname and even that confuses people.

Why dont you want to change your name legally? I’ve read through the thread and I’m still unsure.

Did your therapist say that they think you should change your name, or that they thought you want to change your name and are encouraging you to follow through?

 

[DarkKnight]

NA

 

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[Pain Brain]

It has been my idea all along and the reason to do it is that there is no reason behind it. There's no point really. I just find it amusing and it's a game to me to throw people off balance and the whole affair is just funny.

That's the actual truth of it all.

Very childish reasoning considering your initial post. Don't understand why you'd waste people's time and suggestions for the sake of amusement.

 

[DarkKnight]

NA