Why only certain people "enjoy" the process? (Or is it something else?)

[Tallphil]

It's funny that I just stumbled upon this thread.

Around 1 year ago I started my journey of "wanting to be an entrepreneur". It's been the toughest and yet most rewarding journey of my life.

Enjoying the journey is all about doing something today that you BELIEVE will pay off in the future. That's why passion is KEY. Sometimes it takes a while to see your ROI (time/money).

I was cleaning cars 8 hours a day and using all of my free time to launch and learn the trades of my business.

- I know what an emotional roller coaster feels like.

Around 2 months ago I was able to quit my full time job and ever since I've been doing and feeling GREAT!

Yesterday, at around 3PM it was beautiful outside. I decided to bring my dog and have her run and play in a big open field. As I was watching her as happy as she can be, I started feeling very emotional. It was one of those special moments that you can't help but feel and have a sense of ROI.

Why? Because I was thinking about my own journey. Where I came from. The small actions and decisions that led to this moment. The times were I felt there was no hope, that I almost stopped believing in myself but somehow pulled through.

Be grateful for what you have. Don't compare your journey to someone else's journey.

If someone has more than you, find out why.

 

[luniac]

I've stumbled upon a book recently called:
FLOW
by MIHALY CSIKSZENTMIHALYI

It's a psychology book and is based on a lot of collected research

I'm only 30 pages in but a key message is to get absorbed in whatever you're doing, whether u enjoy the activity or not.
Happiness is a tricky thing, if you ask "am i happy?" you're no longer happy.

I'm an amateur athlete and have been familiar with the "In The Zone" concept for many years, but i've never though about it outside of a sports context.
The book has a sports section i haven't reached yet but i have a feeling that's what it'll be about.
I'm intrigued by this connection. Being in the zone 24/7. That might be true happiness.

The reasoning is that as humans we've historically always tried to find meaning in life, and end up depending on religion, or existentialism or whatever. But these are just distractions and eventually the mind once again wonders back towards questioning reality. And since as far as we know so far, we can't find this answer, it causes suffering and whatnot...

But when you're absorbed into some activity, hobby, or whatever, you're just not thinking about these unanswerable questions.
It's like happiness through distraction, but a fulfilling distraction, a long lasting distraction.

Watching TV is a distraction too but it's not quality like improving a skill or solving problems, etc. Simple pleasures for the sake of pleasure are also not the answer.

Anyway the book is real interesting so far!

Gotta thank sinister lex, he mentioned the book "A guide to rational living" and i looked up a cool summary discussion of it:
https://www.optimize.me/wp-content/uploads/A-Guide-to-Rational-Living.pdf

The summary mentioned the book FLOW, and well i found it free to read online so couldn't resist.

 

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[Kung Fu Steve]

@Kung Fu Steve thank you. That certainly hit home. It is a problem that i haven't solved and it's getting to me. It has been for months if i think about it.

I would like to offer my sincere thanks for you taking your time to write such a long and detailed reply. And i would also like to thank everyone who's contributed.

I do have a friend who has always said he'll borrow money to me if i need it. My Dad has also said in the past that if i really needed it he would re-mortgage one of his properties. I hate asking anyone for money though.

I know my Dad will have a go at me, give me the 3rd degree etc. Even though he's got about 20 properties and i've never asked him for anything before. He'll really make me feel like shit. I was thinking about this the other day and i was with my 8 year old son at the time who's very clever and i said to him, if you ever need anything whether its support, money or anything else don't ever be afraid to come to me. I wouldn't want him to feel like i do now. I've actually been working my way towards asking my Father for months but just can't seem to do it. I know he's got a cash flow problem himself at the moment which hasn't helped. It's not easy picking up the phone and saying Hi Dad, any chance i could take you up on your offer of remortgaging something and putting £125k in my bank. Thanks. haha.

I suppose not knowing is the worst part. If i think about it, even if he does give me shit can it be worse than what i'm facing now? If he says yes then i would feel like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.

Anyway i'm going on a different tangent now so i'll leave it there.....

125k is a big loan. What is actually necessary to fulfill your purchase orders now? Or how committed are you to moving every unit to ensure that money get repaid?

We can talk emotion all day long but you also need strategy. If you're looking for a sunset and you run east as hard and fast as you can -- you'll never find it.

What are you selling? Is it a high end product? What would you do with the 125k? Could you accomplish the same thing with 25k? or 2.5k?

Within a few seconds you already became more resourceful -- keep it up!!

 

[wade1mil]

I've been on both sides of this. The difference for me was scarcity mindset vs abundance mindset.
That's it.
Nothing is fun when you have no time, money or hope.

 

[G-Man]

Just read the entire thread, and all I can think is: What would Victor Frankl say?

Maybe: Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

Maybe: Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'.

Maybe: Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it.

Mostly I think he'd say: I was happier in Dachau than you are in __________. Maybe your situation isn't the problem.

Before anyone gets offended, yes I'm putting words in Victor Frankl's mouth. This is the internet dammit.

 

[Young-Gun]

We spend most of our lives trying to escape our fear of death.

Why do we want to make money? To feel secure and live long.
Why do we want to be healthy? To feel secure and live long.
Why do we want to have good relationships? To feel secure and live long.

Feeling like we're escaping death gives us a certain pleasure which most people confuse with happiness. It's the rush we get from buying a new car or getting a new girl.

What happens once we make enough money is that we don't know what to do anymore because we're so used to running away from death. We're trying to avoid the fear of nothingness / purposelessness that's getting more and more present, the less we have to run away from. We search for meaning.

We start new businesses or project our desire for purpose into another area that we can improve on ("now that I have money, I can focus on getting the body of my dreams and THEN life will be perfect").

Of course, this also won't happen. If you are fortunate enough to be at this stage of life, then the solution is to stay with that fear until it's gone, without reacting to it. It's just a feeling and will cease after enough time spent with it. What comes afterward is the real joy.

How does that all relate to enjoying the process?

It's quite simple actually: Whenever you're still in the process of building your business, you're likely running away from death. Nobody enjoys running away from something, this is why the process can feel dreadful and motivation decreases.

Whenever you're not happy working, ask yourself "Is my real motivation to work right now to escape death?" (aka. make ends meet?). Most of the time, if not all the time, the answer will be a yes.

In this stage, if we exchange the running away from with a running toward, life changes.

If you're working for a higher goal than surviving, which also concerns other people ("I really want to teach X how to do Y, that's why I'm creating my course!"), then you need less will power to sit down and work.

If you, in addition, decide to spend time with your fear of death (or the more dominant manifestation of not making enough money), you have less and less to run away from and more and more to run toward.

Happiness increases, quality increases, output increases, income increases.

Wow, super deep. Thanks for the morning thoughts. I think you are 100% correct, but I never thought about it this way.

For me, money/income is definitely tied to anxieties about life and death. Thanks for helping putting a piece of the puzzle together, and I'll make the most of this day - enjoying the process, and staying happy to be alive, regardless of finances

It's a sunny day and there's a soft white cat in my yard! Coffee is hot and I've got tons to do.

 

[Paul David]

@Kung Fu Steve thank you. That certainly hit home. It is a problem that i haven't solved and it's getting to me. It has been for months if i think about it.

I would like to offer my sincere thanks for you taking your time to write such a long and detailed reply. And i would also like to thank everyone who's contributed.

I do have a friend who has always said he'll borrow money to me if i need it. My Dad has also said in the past that if i really needed it he would re-mortgage one of his properties. I hate asking anyone for money though.

I know my Dad will have a go at me, give me the 3rd degree etc. Even though he's got about 20 properties and i've never asked him for anything before. He'll really make me feel like shit. I was thinking about this the other day and i was with my 8 year old son at the time who's very clever and i said to him, if you ever need anything whether its support, money or anything else don't ever be afraid to come to me. I wouldn't want him to feel like i do now. I've actually been working my way towards asking my Father for months but just can't seem to do it. I know he's got a cash flow problem himself at the moment which hasn't helped. It's not easy picking up the phone and saying Hi Dad, any chance i could take you up on your offer of remortgaging something and putting £125k in my bank. Thanks. haha.

I suppose not knowing is the worst part. If i think about it, even if he does give me shit can it be worse than what i'm facing now? If he says yes then i would feel like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.

Anyway i'm going on a different tangent now so i'll leave it there.....

 

[ZF Lee]

@proper , the process is indeed hard and grueling. It is for me. Hell, a Fastlane war fought on multiple fronts (studying in college and grinding) is no joke. In the few years to come, I will have to give up many more things in order to get more traction. I'll be screwing a 'stable' academic path that leads to a 'stable' job, screwing the acknowledgement and praises of my peers and relatives. I'll be facing lots of other dangers and threats which the normal 9-5er will not.

Sure, I hate the process at times. I don't like it. I feel like a dirty soldier hiding in a trench amidst the Fritz bombardment of mortar shells.

But I don't give a damn!

Do you know why?

Slowlane harvest: The harvest is small, but the workers are (too) many. Think corporate redundancy, overpopulation effects and competition. You know shit gonna get real when five hundred people are fighting for fifty jobs in the agency.

Fastlane harvest: The harvest is wide, but the workers are few. The workers are few, since everyone thinks a huge harvest is too hard to gather in. Because the workers are few, they use MACHINES or hire other workers to harvest the crops, and comb in more goodies.



Process and hard work are universal values, but the issue is WHERE is the harvest, WHAT are the MACHINES, HOW to use and get the MACHINE, and HOW to MAINTAIN a good steady production of crops. Only then process and hard work is fully weaponised, becoming more meaningful!

 

[MythOfSisyphus]

Personally, I've always found that even when I wasn't making any/much money at all there were parts of creating/running businesses that I loved, and parts that I hated.

I always really enjoyed coming up with new ideas, coming up with business or product names. Designing the website layout, writing business plans etc. However I never really enjoyed the grunt work like building backlinks for SEO, or dealing with customers.

Now that my business is doing well that hasn't changed at all. There's parts of the journey I love, and parts that I hate. Overall though, I'd say I love the journey with all it's ups and downs far more than I loved working a regular job.

I can definitely identify with the OP though, in the days of very little success I often became disillusioned for long stretches and gave up on my projects before finding the desire to start something new months later. So success definitely makes it easier to love the process, or at least to endure the parts you don't love so much.

 

[Paul David]

Did you just solve your own problem?

The business does not generate enough profit *yet*.

 

[Paul David]

I don't wanna sound like I've "made it", because that's not true. I'm not 100% fastlane yet.

But yeah, probably. I'm not quite there yet either though, so I guess I'm not sure.

It was more of a product of me realizing that no matter what I did, I was never happy with it. I'm a very high energy guy, and contentment, gratefulness, and satisfaction have not come easy.

Nothing was ever good enough. Always more! more! more!

Always living in the future. If I had this, or did that, then I could finally be happy.

And that's no way to live.

I'm still working on it though haha.

This is exactly what my Wife says to me regarding always wanting more. She didn't write that for you did she? haha.

This is also translates to my non working life thinking about it.
I have a weight goal that i'm currently trying to achieve so i've set myself a target of 15 miles of running per week and 2 fasting days (600 calories or less) per week in order to achieve that. Now today is one of those fasting days. I just want to get the day over with so i can eat more normally tomorrow. Again i'm looking into the future. I also think though that sometimes in order to achieve something you have to sacrifice.

I know i need to enjoy more of the here and now, i think i just don't know how. I understand it must also be difficult for my wife and kids to live with someone who thinks like i do. It's hard enough for me and there are times i wish i could be that person who's content with what's he's got. That's just not me though. Not at the moment anyway.

 

[Darko Jocic]

So, you wanna enjoy the process, eh? Well, let's analyze what seems to be the issue.

First, why don't we pinpoint exactly when you are not enjoying the process? It might surprise you, but, it's not while you're in the process. You feel dissatisfied with the process only in the brief(hopefully brief, that is) pauses you make in between resuming the process. A person can only focus on one thing at a time(you can look it up yourself if you need to), which means "multitasking" is a very fast shifting of attention from one thing to the next(had to mention it, since most people try to discredit this with "multitasking exists, so you're wrong").

So, while you're in the process, no problems. As soon as you stop being in the process, problems occur. Interesting...

Looks like you're stopping the process so you can think about how much better it would be if you had everything the process is supposed to provide for you.

Moving on. You say you need more money and traveling in order to enjoy the process.
- Ask yourself this: "Can two(or more) people feel differently about the same thing?", or: "Can someone have the money and the traveling, but still not enjoy the process?"

Obviously, yes. The world is vast, after all. So?

So, THAT IS the very point. If an object can be looked at from different perspectives, then it obviously ISN'T the thing that's creating the perspective.

Whoa, you've just solved your own problem instantly. 2 people feeling differently in the same circumstances is 100% legitimate proof that the feelings are entirely controlled by the person, as the person is the only variable. The environment stays constant.

"You said just money and traveling, but now you're saying everything except the person is the same!" Exactly. Why? Because relevance. You could get a brand new toaster for free today, but it's not what you think you need to enjoy the process. You've singled out money and traveling for a reason. They're relevant. Anything else could change, but you need those exact things to enjoy the process. Everything else is irrelevant, right?

Right. Well, not quite. Yes, everything else IS irrelevant, since you singled out what you wanted. And yes, money and traveling ARE important to you, because you've singled them out. Now, we've already proven that they, by themselves, can't help you(like, at all) to enjoy the process. But, they are important, still.

We all know very well what we want; What we need, not so much.

So, now, we've proven that what you feel, i.e. your perception, is fully within your control, you're the one creating it.
Now, you may or may not be wondering: "If it really was in my full control, everything would be picture-perfect, right?". Not necessarily. Are YOU picture-perfect?

This has been getting deeper than I've originally intended, so I'll just stop.
My point was, YOU are responsible for everything. Nothing in the environment can really affect you, and as such, you don't need money or traveling to enjoy the process. You need to accept that there is nothing stopping you from enjoying the process(except yourself). Let yourself enjoy, and you will.

 

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[Paul David]

@Paul David Update please!

Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve posted. I’ve been working on myself and my business.

I’ve just re-read the whole thread and once again I would like to thank yourself and everybody else who’s taken the time to respond.

I also hope the initial question has helped others who were struggling on finding the answer.

Myself? I’ve definitely got more of an understanding now between the differences between the process and problems that occur in general business. I feel as though I’ve still got further to travel but I’m on my way.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Paul David]

So...you'd enjoy the process more if you had a Range Rover in the driveway?

Do you really think that's true?

No it's not. Actually a Range Rover would be desirable but it's not at the top of my list. I had brand new Mercedes Cars before and i know that after the initial buzz the excitement wears off. I would though without a shadow of doubt enjoy the processes more if i was earning £20,000 a month and could afford to travel more. That's my number 1 aim before any bigger house, car, etc.

 

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[LPPC]

Do external/material things bring guaranteed happiness? I don't think so. Knowing this, you can make an informed decision on how to live your life. Worth checking out:

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xxqg4PHg3M

 

[c_morris]

Nothing was ever good enough. Always more! more! more!

Always living in the future. If I had this, or did that, then I could finally be happy.

And that's no way to live.

I'm still working on it though haha.

Amen. I think we've all been here at some point in our lives. It's a tough hurdle to leap and even when you get past it, there tends to be another that follows it.

The key is to recognize when you have these thoughts/feelings and take action to stop them.

Sent from my SM-G930W8 using Tapatalk

 

[Paul David]

Bump.
Thank you so much @Kung Fu Steve. Your posts in this thread are so important to me today. You just bent my head & turned it 180 degree the other way around! Thank you, thank you and thank you...
Also @Paul David , I really appreciate your OP, your honesty here. I can relate to most of what you described here. Any updates Paul? Thanks

Since my last update in January i've launched my new brand and sold my power adapter brand. I felt a big weight lifted off my shoulders when the old brand was sold. 15 years of was long enough and had taken its toll.

I've been using facebook ads to grow the new brand and to be honest was expecting a better start than i've had.

I've also recently been reading a lot of self help books, mindset improvement and Bob Proctor type you tube videos. They have certainly improved my outlook as i was really struggling a few months ago.

At the moment the initial excitement of launching the brand has gone and now the real in the trench work has begun on growing it. I will be a lot happier when it's earning enough to provide at least an adequate monthly wage but this is where i believe a lot of entrepreneurs give up or look for other things.

 

[BigRomeDawg]

I took home about $80,000 last month...boring.

I can't relate, but I think if myself and others on the journey really absorbed this, our thoughts and actions would be way different

 

[germandude]

Whenever I feel overwhelmed, stressed out and look at the hardships to come, I remember one sentence and go on. It's magnificently perfect because it invokes the need for work and the need of control in you. The sentence is:

"All you can do is all you can do. And all you can do is enough."​

 

[proper]

Look how much further ahead you are. Look at what you've already accomplished. Look at your mindset and how it's different than the vast majority of people around you. And then start to get grateful for the shit you've forgotten. Like your health, your family, your wealth, the roof over your head, the technology you didn't have to invent that you run your business on now -- hell the ability to HAVE a problem like you're currently having.

Thanks a lot, Steve. Your words are like slapping on my face, but in a much nicer way. It tells me to wake up, look at things around me and be grateful.

For my past startup projects, I always gave up on the first set of road blocks. The roads are closed! There is no way I can do this. It is just no way. "The App Store is saturated! I can not think of any app ideas! People and their dogs are making apps." That is my quote in 2009... Instead of working on meeting the basic needs, I was always chasing shining new ideas. Because that's the event I enjoy. I hate the process and avoided it like hell.

Fast forward to today, I see things very differently. I'm working on the process instead of the events. But the process is hard work. I got frustrated a lot of times. I was wondering why all of the gurus seem to love it so much... It sounds like a wonderful experience...

Your words and some other contributors to this post make it very clear that the process is indeed hard work. I will need to find a way to enjoy it!

 

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[Big Z]

May I suggest a book called the "The Practicing Mind".

Also Mindset is so important. If you spend a lot time in a negative mindset for this reason or that, you block yourself from seeing the solution to the problem. This creates more problems and you get a snowball effect.
It takes effort at first but it's so important to check yourself when you get in that state of mind and go back to staying positive. Meditation helps with this, because it will make you aware of your thoughts as if you are just watching and you don't get involved in the thought and so you have an opportunity to shift the mental process. Let that negative thought flare up and fizzle out, by just observing yourself.
When you stay positive you think more clearly which results in your creative mind being more available to solve issues that come up constantly in your business, life , etc.
Hope this helps
Z

 

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[Kung Fu Steve]

@Paul David Update please!

 

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[Intax]

This is also translates to my non working life thinking about it.
I have a weight goal that i'm currently trying to achieve so i've set myself a target of 15 miles of running per week and 2 fasting days (600 calories or less) per week in order to achieve that. Now today is one of those fasting days. I just want to get the day over with so i can eat more normally tomorrow. Again i'm looking into the future. I also think though that sometimes in order to achieve something you have to sacrifice.

I know i need to enjoy more of the here and now, i think i just don't know how. I understand it must also be difficult for my wife and kids to live with someone who thinks like i do. It's hard enough for me and there are times i wish i could be that person who's content with what's he's got. That's just not me though. Not at the moment anyway.

The problem is the event driven approach described in Unscripted . If you do your running and fasting for your goal "to be more healthy, thinner,..." you aren't enjoying the process.

The process to your goal will only make you happy if you'll be able to find joy in sports, healthy eating, to forgo,....
Try to appreciate these actions, not for the sake of getting closer to you goal, only for the action itself. You can actively learn to enjoy activities you didn't like in the first place.

Learning to enjoy the process which brings us to our goal is the healthiest way to reach our goal finally.

I can highly recommend the classic book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"

 

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[GoodluckChuck]

Part of being more successful than others is being better at handling the boring parts. Everyone has to do it. Life is short but the days are long. The people that can push through are the ones that get the rewards. Check out 75 Hard.

What gets me excited is looking past the little bits of work I need to do and seeing the big picture. I'm trying to build a machine that can run without me. It's currently broken and incomplete so it's super exciting to me to solve those problems. Once they are solved I'll have to find other problems to solve. It's that challenge that keeps me engaged and excited. I think this is what a lot of people fall in love with. They find real meaning and purpose in solving these problems because they are the only ones for the job.

Read the book Man's Search for Meaning and you'll get some great tips on creating meaning in your life. Once you have your why you can endure any how.

 

[Paul David]

May I suggest a book called the "The Practicing Mind".

Also Mindset is so important. If you spend a lot time in a negative mindset for this reason or that, you block yourself from seeing the solution to the problem. This creates more problems and you get a snowball effect.
It takes effort at first but it's so important to check yourself when you get in that state of mind and go back to staying positive. Meditation helps with this, because it will make you aware of your thoughts as if you are just watching and you don't get involved in the thought and so you have an opportunity to shift the mental process. Let that negative thought flare up and fizzle out, by just observing yourself.
When you stay positive you think more clearly which results in your creative mind being more available to solve issues that come up constantly in your business, life , etc.
Hope this helps
Z

Finally got around to reading The Practicing Mind this weekend. Here's a particular interesting quote from it.

"Most of us find that we are very good at practicing properly during recreational activities. We perform these activities with all our attention in the present and on what we are doing. What is the difference, then, between work activities and recreational activities?

Why do we find it so much easier to focus on something we consider play than on something we consider work? If we can find answers to these questions, they could help us advance our efforts toward operating in a present-minded state all the time. I have found that the only difference between the two sorts of activities is that we prejudge them.

We make a conscious decision that if we enjoy an activity, it is not work. So we must temporarily suspend our definition of work as referring to our daily vocation. Work, in this discussion, refers to any activity we don’t feel like doing, and though it could certainly include our job duties, or at least parts of them, it could also include any activity that we think is “undesirable.”

We know that this prejudgment of whether an activity is work or play is not universal, because one person’s hobby is another person’s drudgery. Some people love to garden; others don’t even want to cut the grass. I watched a program one evening called The Joy of Snakes. To me, that’s a self-contradictory title, but to the show’s host, it made perfect sense.

The knowledge that we prejudge our activities and then place them into one of the two categories is very powerful. It demonstrates to us that nothing is really work or play. We make an activity into work or play by our judgments. The next time you find yourself doing something that you really don’t feel like doing, stop for a moment and ask yourself why. What is it about the activity that makes you feel that way?

You will find that many times you really can’t put your finger on why you don’t want to do something. You will end up saying, “I just don’t feel like doing this right now.” This implies that what you feel like doing is something else that you have defined as “not work.” You are not in the present but instead are in the future, anticipating another activity."

 

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[Paul David]

I dunno man, I've struggled with the same feelings you have most of my life.

I've traveled a LOT...boring.

Nice cars...boring.

I took home about $80,000 last month...boring.

The only thing that worked for me was finding a "why" that was bigger than myself.

My kids. Charity work. My God. All bigger than myself. But still not enough...

My "why" ended up being the process itself.



This ^^^^

Hmm very interesting. I think i may need to read that a dozen times or so before it sinks in.
Do you think however you needed to experience those things though personally in order to rule them out? I'm a big believer in "why" and i've spent a lot of time thinking about it.

 

[Paul David]

At the end of the day there is a science to achievement. You follow certain formulas and you achieve a certain result. Like a recipe. MJ and the Fastlane reveal one of these formulas. There's laws, there's steps, if you follow them -- you will find the success.

On the other hand there is an ART to fulfillment. What fulfills you will be drastically different than what fulfills me.

It is a **MUST**, not a should to figure out this part of life.

You can achieve all the success in the world, you can make everyone else happy -- but if you can't make yourself happy? If you can't master the art of being fulfilled? Well, you end up like a Chris Farley, a Kurt Cobain, or a Robin Williams.

Being fulfilled doesn't mean you're happy all day, every day. In fact, it usually takes a little discomfort to find out what your true path is and what truly fulfills you -- and the reason it's called an ART is that there are a million things you can do to be fulfilled... but I will warn you that not a single one of them involves an event.

You remember MJ talking about process versus event, right?

The challenge for most of us (me included) is that there have been several times in our lives where we think "if only THIS would happen, then I can be happy."

A financial goal, a thing goal, a relationship -- a whatever. 100% of the time though I guarantee the moment you hit a goal -- something you've wanted to achieve there will be a point where you say "is this all there is?"

It happens to every single human being.

Astronauts who go to the moon, return to a ticker tape parade, dinner with the president, and then they become alcoholics... because what is there to do once you've been to the moon? Something you've trained your entire life for? And you realize that EVENT that THING that you wanted so bad and achieved? Well it wasn't really the thing itself...

We're all looking for a feeling. An emotional state called happiness. Satisfaction. Pride. Winning. Whatever you want to call it. But the dangerous part about seeking the event over the process is that state is temporary -- that's why we all ask "is this all there is?"

So to answer your original question I'd highly recommend while you think being in love with the process is bullshit -- you must find a way to love it.

You must find a way to make the day-to-day work fulfilling because the danger if you don't is that you may end up bored, you may end up frustrated, you may end up lethargic, you may end up depressed, sad, angry, pissed off, you may end up feeling like "what's the point?", and ultimately you may end up living a life unfulfilled.

And I would argue that's the ultimate pain.

Where you let yourself become so dead inside that you can't enjoy the adventure of a smile. Where you won't let yourself get excited because you've been let down so many times that it would be foolish and naive to allow that to happen again. Where you spend 8-12 hours of your day slaving away at work that you hate, work that isn't fulfilling, work that doesn't support you.

I agree most people are saying they "love the process" simply because Gary V says it and it's cool. But I've got to say if you don't find a way to be fulfilled in your work -- there's a good chance it's going to lead to a miserable existence.

There's my 3 cents... I had an extra penny in my pocket today...

Very Interesting thanks.

So I've just woken up and checked my shipment in China to see if it's cleared customs yet. No it's still on hold. Has been for 3 days now. We've got no stock of 80% of our lines. Sales are down drastically.

My other supplier has sent me a Skype message saying an order is ready to ship and needs payment. I can't pay because of the delays from the first order has caused a major cash flow problem.

If I had money then the first problem wouldn't be great but certainly not as stressful as it's making me now and the second issue wouldn't exist because I'd simply pay for the goods.

Processes haven't changed but my enjoyment of them would be drastically different.

Of course I could be then unhappy about something else but at least it's on a rung higher up the ladder.





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[mindfulimmortal]

I hear successful entrepreneurs say it quite a lot on motivation youtube videos or seminars.
Instead of focussing on the end goal, enjoy the journey and process along the way they say.

Personally for the majority of people in business i think it's bullshit. If you're just starting out in business and you're all excited about how much money you're going to make, or how you are going to change people's lives, give them value etc then yes i believe you will enjoy the "initial" process.

If you're making $25,000 a month or whatever your desired figure is then yes i believe you will be enjoying the daily process.

For anybody else, especially those who have been in the process for a number of years when the initial excitement has long gone and you've not reached your desired level, i believe the process becomes akin to those who go to work for somebody else every day.

It's Monday morning now, it's raining as usual and i've just taken kids to school. I'm just about to go on my daily 3m run then i will sit down and start work for the day. I can work from home or go to the office, which is exactly how i like to work compared to having to sit in a car stuck in traffic like a lot of people. So that side is all well and good.

However i wouldn't say i'm going to exactly "enjoy" what i'm going to do today. I don't look forward to sitting at my screen all day whilst the rain pounds against my window. Sure it's better than a lot other alternatives and i don't wish to sound ungrateful but if i had woken up this morning and seen that i'd made my desired target X amount of sales would i enjoy the process a lot more? Hell yes.

If i could afford to spend every school holiday away in the sun somewhere, drive a Range Rover, not have my wife work, be debt free etc how would i feel about spending this very same Monday. It would be great. I wouldn't want to do anything different.

Unless someone can perform a mindset change on me without evasive surgery i personally don't believe it's possible to enjoy the process unless you're a startup or have a desired financial income.

There is a great book called Shop Class for the Soulcraft that examines the changes from building/making things (motorcycle, woodworking, etc.) to the move of more of an abstract services or information work. Back in the day we all were part of a process of building something physical. You got to see the results of your process such as a new motorcycle being driven off your lot. Today we sometimes don't see the customers result or solution being solved directly and the sense of satisfaction is challenging. There is no holy grail answer to make it more direct but understanding the process and what Costomer Jobs to be done are being solved helps.

 

[MarekvBeek]

Most of the times I read, and I rarely post something here. But this topic hit me somehow...

After reading this topic and thinking about it, this was what came to my thought.

I feel this topic is really a question of happiness.

What makes you happy in life?

When I think of my life, I think of how I grew and grow as a person. I'm not a rich man in the sense of money, but I do feel rich when I think of how I care less of what other people think.

I created a book I wanted to write for a long time. Many people would say that it wouldn't work out. I thought, just sh*t up and write Marek. Now the book is out and do you think people still say the same?

Yes I have other challenges now, which I ignored for a few weeks after finishing the book. I thought I was finished. Same like someone said here, I "paused". From that moment I started to feel more and more frustrated/demotivated.

"What the hell is wrong?" I thought.

Well nothing is wrong, I just lost my sense of purpose. Now I found a new purpose to promote my book. And yes... it came from choosing betweem options.

So if you have options (and yes you have) you will "enjoy the process". When I wrote my book, I had many options. But I chose to pursue the book.

It sounds silly and like a cliché, but you have to find purpose (and re-read MJ's chapter on Need (Chapter 30)). If you don't, then be honest to yourself. I don't want to own a Lamborghini, maybe someday I will, but it's not my purpose. Mines are different than yours, find yours!

Marek

 

[sparechange]

funny was just thinking about this a few moments ago, i think enjoying the process is a part addiction to escaping your reality.

atm my reality involves taking a bus, train and having to walk by a lamborghini dealership frequently, it puts a bit of pain inside me and i feel like worthless scum riding the bus, i want to be the guy in a $500k+ lambo with nice clean clothes and a gorgeous woman with massive breasts sitting beside me.

but who am i? just some stupid loser that rides a bus. as a reminder when im feeling tired when working on something ill think about this quite frequently. consider the process a temporary escape.