2016-17 Fastlane Fantasy Football (Official)

[Vigilante]

I emailed MJ with my intent to play in the Fantasy Fastlane 2016-17, but I am posting here on the Fastlane Forum as well. My team was awful last year and I need to make up for that bad showing last season and get back to winning, like I did in the first season of the FF, where I finished second. The last two seasons have been fun and competitive and I expect no less this season. In the immortal words of boxing referee Mills Lane: "Let's get it on!"

second is the first loser

 

[Veloce Grey]

Have you ever studied horse racing

I feel appalled you ask that question out of the blue as if Irish people are a bunch of problem gamblers, on top of their predilection for brawling/drinking/getting sunburnt.

Though I will point out that when researching the family tree via old newspapers I found out great great granddad came out on a ship from Ireland in the 1860s, went to the races and got two months in jail for starting a brawl over which horse had won a particular race. The paper devoted a huge amount of space to the trial-must have been a slow news month.

 

[Vigilante]

Good call out! Well played!

Was out on jobsites last two days while @Vigilante was windsurfing (yes, jealous). I am not a 65 year old woman on ebay all day, so let me dig out my paypal info and get my dues in.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

1) Draft date is set ... Thursday September 1st, 8:30 PM MST.
2) Draft order is set (I chose the first random order).
3) Waiver Rules will be FAAB -- Free Agent Acquisition Budget, which by all measures, seems to be the fairest.

$100 waiver budget -- top bid receives waiver claim, in case of ties, person with worst record receives claim.
$100 must last your entire season. You can bid $0.

Scoring DIFFERENCES versus Standard more variation w/kickers and defenses

1) QB Thrown TD (6 vs 4)
2) Half-point PPR (point per reception)
3) Field Goals (sliding scale from 2.5 - 4pts based on distance, missed FG's are NEGATIVE points if less than 40 yards. XP miss, -1. (See league scoring)
4) 100+ Yards Rushing by Player, 2 point bonus.
5) Defensive Changes

• 4th down stops +1,
  
• Tackles for losses .1 point.
• 3-and-outs, .25 points,
  
• Yards allowed > 500, -1pt,
• < 100 yards allowed +3
• 0-100 yards allowed +2
• 100-199 yards allowed +1

 

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[Richie Rich]

Fantasy Fastlane/Shiva Bowl Champion – SarcastaballAllStars (15-1)

Fellow Fastlaners, thank you all for an amazing season of Fantasy Football. I’m still in shock at not only winning the championship, but how great a season my team had. Fifteen wins and one loss. Unbelievable. A ten-game winning streak and then a five-game winning streak to close out the season. Unreal. This season has been a nice distraction from the pains, stresses and problems of real life. I’m still adjusting to life post-cancer diagnosis/surgery/treatment, so having this to look forward to has been nice. I know I’ve been extremely lucky (in life and in FF), so I will enjoy this and I look forward to defending my title next year, so long as MJ will have me back to play next year and my health holds up (knock on wood!). I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and that you all have a great New Year.

MJ, my hat is off to you sir for running a top-notch FF league once again this year. Thank you for allowing me to participate again this year, although you and everyone else in the league probably wish I hadn’t! But seriously, I hope whatever you are facing health wise is minor and merely a bump in the road and nothing long-term and/or serious. This league would not be fun without you as the commissioner.

I get a kick out of telling friends and family about who I play against week to week. Some don’t believe me, so I have to show them the Amazon page for the Millionaire Fastlane and the Fastlane Forum. Sorry to name drop, but you guys are like rock stars to me, starting with nothing but an idea and creating your own individual empires and creating value from nothing. I don’t get starstruck by “celebrities”, but I do when it comes to those who have created and sustained successful businesses.

I’ll shutup now, but thanks again to everyone who played and for making this season the best I’ve had so far. I hope everyone who played this year (minus You Will Win, for obvious reasons) comes back to play next year. I can’t believe how fast this season went. I hate to see it end, but it was a fun ride. Now I have to figure out what do I do for an encore?

BTW: For those wondering about my team name, I was struggling to come up with a unique name and I remembered the South Park episode, Sarcastaball and I figured, why not? If you haven’t seen the episode, it’s pretty funny, if you like the type of humor that South Park is known for. It’s been a few years since it aired, as it makes fun of the replacement refs, but goes after the NFL for trying to make a game that is inherently violent safe to the point of losing what makes football what it is and why people watch it. Sorry, I had to throw the Shiva Bowl mention in there. My nephews got me to watch The League on Netflix and I’ve been calling the championship the Shiva Bowl. Let the eye rolling commence.

 

[ZCP]

I'm in. You changing your team name to 'Lucky Horse Shite'?

 

[ZCP]

Put @Vigilante in. From his other thread, he has nothing but free time by the ocean to scrape the waiver wire for a top 3 team.
His team name will be 'Notable'.

 

[Andy Black]

@Andy Black make just take that as a challenge!

Ha. Flattery isn't going to work @ZCP.



I have a good track record of going into sports I don't know and winning with fantasy teams (think spreadsheets, data, a special & secret tactic, and a few wasted hours) .

However, I'm obsessive-compulsive so know to step away from rabbit holes.



PS: If you want to know my secret tactic that's simple, replicable, and no-one else seems to follow (yet so obvious you'll face-palm) then just Paypal $77 to FantasyTeamGuru96@gmail.com

 

[devine]

Interactions in this thread are golden.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Got one spot available...

If you want it, the first to post here gets it.

-- You must be an INSIDERS OR have at least 50 posts. (Sorry, don't want to play with an anonymous user)

 

[Vigilante]

I smell a sandbagger!

I heard side wagers are a good way to learn.

As long as nobody plans on taking advantage of the new kid, but you all seem reputable.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

I wonder what Jay Ajayi goes for in the bidding this week after rushing for 200 yards....

$1 MEEEEEELION DOLLLARS!

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Just thought I'd mention that the two LAST PLACE teams in the league were celebrated by Yahoo's draft ratings receiving their only 2 A's.

And now they sit in the cellar.

If there is one certainty in life and fantasy football, it is that you DO NOT want Yahoo to give you a good grade on your draft!

Yup, I found this to be true. Their draft grades mean shit. Every year at the season's end, I go back and look at draft grades. I found the A's at the bottom of the barrel moreso than the B's and C's.

Yahoo don't know shit -- celebrating a Yahoo draft grade is like celebrating because you received a Publisher's Clearing House envelope in the mail.

 

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[Vigilante]

Congrats SarcastaballAllStars on an awesome year.

There were a couple of powerhouses in the league that clearly dominated. While I disagree (vehemently) with Dr. Pete's waiver wire concept, his results stand on their own.

Next year, how about we not have the draft at F*cking 3AM Eastern time? I realize it is a solid strategy for you desert dwellers, but I didn't have anyone on my team I liked.

Thanks @MJ for a fun diversion. With the exception of the one ridiculous whiny bitch, it was a fun season. Not many recommended changes for next year. The waiver pool was pretty skinny though, so if your draft sucked or you auto drafted there wasn't much you could do about fixing up a shitty team. No way to really change that though other than a smaller league.

I also do think for next year there needs to be a consolation bracket. Some of the other software providers (ESPN specifically) provides that and might keep people engaged longer. Won't matter to me though as I will be in the playoffs next year. I also never made the correlation between people's fantasy teams, real names, and fastlane forum screen names so maybe next year we can put the list on the fantasy home page so I know whose a$$ I am kicking.

Thanks to all who participated (except the one ridiculous whiny bitch) for a fun and great fantasy football season!

 

[Iwokeup]

Congrats SarcastaballAllStars on an awesome year.

There were a couple of powerhouses in the league that clearly dominated. While I disagree (vehemently) with Dr. Pete's waiver wire concept, his results stand on their own.

Next year, how about we not have the draft at F*cking 3AM Eastern time? I realize it is a solid strategy for you desert dwellers, but I didn't have anyone on my team I liked.

Thanks @MJ for a fun diversion. With the exception of the one ridiculous whiny bitch, it was a fun season. Not many recommended changes for next year. The waiver pool was pretty skinny though, so if your draft sucked or you auto drafted there wasn't much you could do about fixing up a shitty team. No way to really change that though other than a smaller league.

I also do think for next year there needs to be a consolation bracket. Some of the other software providers (ESPN specifically) provides that and might keep people engaged longer. Won't matter to me though as I will be in the playoffs next year. I also never made the correlation between people's fantasy teams, real names, and fastlane forum screen names so maybe next year we can put the list on the fantasy home page so I know whose a$$ I am kicking.

Thanks to all who participated (except the one ridiculous whiny bitch) for a fun and great fantasy football season!

You know, you talked smack but failed to deliver.......

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Actually, our league this year DID have a consolation bracket, but it didn't start until week 15. Looks like I won it, LOL.

Duh, I am wrong here. Looks like there was no consolation bracket and that was just the losers of the championship bracket still playing -- I took 5th place and I didn't even know I was still playing for a prize pool.

Looks like next year we need to be clearer of the rules -- I wasn't even setting my line up after the week 14 loss and elimination.

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Everyone has been paid. Great year guys -- next year will be even better as we trade down to 12 teams!

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Folks, it is that time again this year! As defending champion and league commissioner, it's time to start this year's azz whooping again!

If you played last year, you have a spot reserved in the league.

However, I MUST HEAR from you if you intend to play again this year.

@bigred
@Iwokeup
@Veloce Grey
@Likwid24
@saigon
@ZCP

There are several others who I do not know your username.

If you played last YEAR and are playing THIS year, please let me know.

Otherwise, I will replace your team.

 

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[Andy Black]

And @Andy Black HAS to be in. He could put together a video series for us on how to scrape the waiver wire.
American football rules!

I read this thread all the way through and sooo don't have a clue what you're all talking about - which is probably why you want me to play.

In this case though, the fish knows he's the fish so will respectfully not sit at the table with his chips.


Now why did I say fish and chips? That's only gone and made me hungry...

 

[ZCP]

@Vigilante , I had no idea font size could be that big. No fear.

The bet: Head to head. Winner has better regular season record OR deeper playoff run. Any tie broken by most points scored in regular season.

Add on: When @Andy Black signs up, he joins us in this as a three way bet.

 

[ZCP]

which is it? Regular season record or deeper playoff run? I will do either.
Andy Black will never join. He's not wise to the ways of the American (football).

Both. Regular season record first. If one of us makes the playoffs and the other does not, playoffs is the winner. If both make the playoffs, whoever goes farthest in playoffs is winner or regular season record as tiebreaker if both go out in same round. Any other tiebreaker is points scored in regular season.

@Andy Black make just take that as a challenge!

 

[Vigilante]

Ha. Flattery isn't going to work @ZCP.



I have a good track record of going into sports I don't know and winning with fantasy teams (think spreadsheets, data, a special & secret tactic, and a few wasted hours) .

However, I'm obsessive-compulsive so know to step away from rabbit holes.



PS: If you want to know my secret tactic that's simple, replicable, and no-one else seems to follow (yet so obvious you'll face-palm) then just Paypal $77 to FantasyTeamGuru96@gmail.com

Have you ever studied horse racing

 

[ZCP]

PS: If you want to know my secret tactic that's simple, replicable, and no-one else seems to follow (yet so obvious you'll face-palm) then just Paypal $77 to FantasyTeamGuru96@gmail.com

Got anything on craps or roulette?

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

Both. Regular season record first. If one of us makes the playoffs and the other does not, playoffs is the winner. If both make the playoffs, whoever goes farthest in playoffs is winner or regular season record as tiebreaker if both go out in same round. Any other tiebreaker is points scored in regular season.

You talk a lot of smack for someone who hasn't paid their dues... @Vigilante has!

 

[MJ DeMarco]

Any added points for a QB & WR pair? "stacking".

No, other than that pair get's 12 pts, plus yardage on a TD pass. 25 YD TD Pass = 16 pts.

 

[Veloce Grey]

I think I need to sell this deal better, perhaps by showcasing the talent predicted to be available at picks 41 or 44....

Andrew Luck-went 1st overall in our draft last year! Had some slight injury issues but performed really well for 13 of the 14 league members who could happily sit there thinking "well at least I didn't take Andrew Luck first overall". That means 92.8% of the league were delighted with how he played last year.

Greg Olsen-Basically a slower, slightly worse version of Gronk but he's at least far more durable. Though to be fair I also own a teddy bear who is more durable than Gronk. Talks more sense too.

DeMarco Murray-aside from leading the league in rushing in 2014, he's got a really Fastlane friendly name.

Frank Gore-sure he and Vig went to school together but if the NFL respects equal rights for aged gentlemen they'll soon bring in a rule change to let Frank ride his mobility scooter around the field instead of running. No more injury issues as the tires on those things are far easier to replace than an ACL.

 

[Vigilante]

Perhaps we could start the draft at 2AM Pacific? That would be 5AM Eastern.

Hope the autodraft doesn't misfire or I will have a lot of waiver wire work to do.

 

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[Veloce Grey]

You kind of just diluted the value of my bitching.

I was bitching just for the sake of bitching. The draft time isn't changing.

I just wanted to get a placeholder in there in case my autodraft sucks with the rankings I have painstakingly provided.

Have I got a deal for you!

I'll log in using your details and draft according to your rankings while making sure it doesn't go nuts and draft you 5 QBs or 0 QBs.

It will only cost you a 6th round pick.

Today only I'm also providing an upsell where for one easy payment of an 8th round pick, every time MJ makes a selection I'll berate it in chat saying "na horrible selection that guy's a bust"

 

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[Vigilante]

I will mock his picks and I don't even need a reason. Or an incentive.

 

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[MJ DeMarco]

If there is one certainty in life and fantasy football, it is that you DO NOT want Yahoo to give you a good grade on your draft!

Yup, I found this to be true. Their draft grades mean shit. Every year at the season's end, I go back and look at draft grades. I found the A's at the bottom of the barrel moreso than the B's and C's.

 

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